Hearted Youtube comments on The Car Care Nut (@TheCarCareNut) channel.
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I worked at a Toyota dealer in the late 90's. We had a customer that had been transporting her pet snake in an aquarium, and the aquarium had broken- thus setting it free in the car. She had tried to get it out but it had made its way under the dash on the driver's side. Our service writer was an idiot, so here I was reaching under the dash to retrieve a very irate python from the confines of a Camry dashboard.
I "suited up" (long sleeves and work gloves) and went to doing my best crocodile hunter impersonation. It is at this point I should pause to set the stage, it was mid February and about 20-odd degrees outside, and she had been running the heat on the way to the dealership. Now because of the way reptiles are assembled, that whole "heat" part does tend to amplify their state of being- see also: he was large, angry, and moving with a purpose. I, on the other hand was cold irritated and had no damned clue what my idiot boss had gotten me in to.
All I had learned about snakes to this point in life had taught me that constrictors had no fangs, so I figured "no fangs, no problem", tossed on the gloves and went to reaching around like a near sighted gynecologist. It was after the bastard bit through the glove and made contact with skin that I realized that perhaps I didn't pay enough attention to Animal Planet, for it turns out that "lacking fangs" and "lacking teeth" were, in fact, two completely different concepts, and the ripped glove and (profusely bleeding) hand I pulled back out from under the dash were a testament to my epiphany.
I proceeded to close the doors up and calmly walk to the first aid kit, and tend to my wounds (our service bay had a huge window that connected to the customer waiting area, so we had to be on our best behavior at all times). I spoke with the service manager (trying to get out of a rematch, seeing as I had just gotten my butt kicked by something incapable of self awareness), and was informed if the service writer sold it, I had to do it.
So I cautiously get into the car, and adjust the seat. It bites the toe of my boot as I sat behind the wheel. I pull the car outside and use the only advantage I have over the oversized worm with an attitude problem- I am warm blooded, b#tch.
I open the sunroof crack all of the windows, and put the A/C on max. It eventually releases my boot, and I exit the vehicle. I probably could've gotten it out quicker than I did, but I let that car outside running for about 3hrs. When I went back out to see if it was ready to leave yet I found that it was still irritated, still frightened, but in MUCH less of a hurry, and was much more compliant than the gash in my hand would have led me to believe.
It took about 30 mins to untangle it, but I pulled a 6.5 foot long snake out from under the dash without further injury, and the only collateral damage to the vehicle was the brake switch had been broken at some point during our wrestling match.
fast forward to the following friday, and I'm going over my flag hours, and I see "remove snake/ 0.3hrs"....
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