Hearted Youtube comments on British Landeur (@BritishLandeur) channel.
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This post is lengthy, so bypass if reading a lot is not your thing 👍
Almost twenty eight years ago, I narrowly escaped a frightening situation that could have ended badly for me. It was not, by far, the first or last one that I dodged or had fallen prey to either; I have managed to escape several attempts against me but, sadly, not in every case.
I lived and grew up within an awful suburb of London where, I can state hand on heart, being a white female was definitely not a ‘privilege’ for me or others that I knew.
I often lived in fear (mostly from physical attack via gangs of teens) and adjusted my behaviours in order to try to avoid becoming a victim. (Everything from sexual assaults to gang related violent crimes in the area.)
The example, which took place in the late 90s, I want to share mainly because some assume that this is a fairly new problem or one that is having its heightened risks towards females (not just children and teens but women and boys/men too) grossly exaggerated by extreme politics.
I was harassed one evening by a persistent, foreign man (who appeared to be North African/Middle Eastern) driving slowly beside me in his car. He would not leave me alone as I walked home, despite my obvious rejections to his repeated attempts to talk to me. He kept asking me to get into his vehicle, which I declined, and then finally to look at what he had in his car. I had been avoiding trying to look at him or make eye contact throughout but, as I turned the corner from the main road into my small street, I looked just to shut him up (hoping he would then go away). I wish that I had not done so as he had his genitals fully exposed and was touching himself as he sat there and then laughed at me. In shock, I immediately insulted him with a profanity. It became immediately clear that he was not a man who tolerated a female speaking back at or down to him.
His entire face changed, in a split second, to absolute rage towards me as he put his foot down on his accelerator to rush his car a little further down my street, and then he abruptly stopped the vehicle. I knew he was going to get out to attack me, so I ran as fast as I possibly could to try to get past him. He rushed out (as predicted and still fully exposing himself) but, thankfully, his right arm got caught in his seatbelt pulling him back and that awarded me a few more vital seconds. Just as I levelled with the boot of his car, he ran around and aggressively lunged forward with his arms to grab me. Had I not arched my back inwards, just a few centimetres, he would have caught me but he stumbled on the ground immediately behind instead. I managed to get across the road to my door, banging and screaming for somebody to open it. He stood across the road, still exposed, waiting and watching the entire time. I was too terrified to take my eyes off him incase he rushed across to approach me from behind. At the point the hall light came on he fled back to his car and swiftly left.
The most shocking part out of all of it, for me, was that I was nine months pregnant but that did not deter him (I was aged 21 - although I did look several years younger than my actual age).
My local police force were called at around 8pm, immediately following the incident, but informed us that due to a shift change I would have to wait around two hours for officers to actually attend. Far too late to catch anyone, had they still been in the locality. I did not feel like a priority case at all. In my view, I had just missed being attacked by a violent and sexual predator who was still out there, driving around, and placing other lone females at immense risk. The police did not appear to be as concerned.
They finally arrived, well after 10pm, with two male officers. One was young and inexperienced, the other quite old and abrupt (limited people skills). He had little patience for me as I was still in shock and unable to spell my full name correctly when repeatedly asked. It was also somewhat humiliating to describe the situation, in full detail, to unknown males. I was lectured more for not getting the license plate number or noticing the car model, alongside several disapproving huffs and tuts.
Another male CID officer, who I had to visit at the local station a week later, refused to log it as an attempted or possible sexual assault (“we cannot deal with the ‘what ifs’”) and reported it in a local newspaper appeal, itself several pages inside within a narrow inner column and only a small few lines, as ‘a flasher’ who exposed himself to a young lady on her street (no mention of his car or attempt to grab me). It did not read anywhere near as traumatic as it actually was.
The entire process made me feel like I was wasting their time by reporting it. It was the first time I had ever called the police to report something (which was, in my case, perpetrated by Asian/ethnic minority individuals/groups within the area - that was a reflection of the locality due to the demographics). For most prior issues I did not bother to report anything (it was already assumed that, for most racial attacks against whites, reporting was a waste of time). Aside from contacting them for advice, regarding a young man who stalked me on and off for around three years (when I was aged between 17-20) but was informed, at the time, that unless he physically harmed me there was nothing in law which permitted the police to arrest him. I learned not to have any faith in the system being able to keep me safe back then.
I wonder, over the years, how many similar or far worse case scenarios have occurred to girls and women that have gone unreported or been treated as insignificant. I have a horrible feeling that this grooming scandal is just the tip of an immensely sized iceberg that has far wider implications across society, up and down this nation.
It is not just happening to girls and women either. Males were r*ped in my locality too. My best friend’s partner only went out to pick up a Friday night takeaway for them and ended up hiding beneath bushes for a period of time, in the darkness of a local park, after a large group of Som*li*n men told him he was good looking, threatened to SA him right there and then chased him. He returned home, shaking and even cried in shock. As a man, aged just under 25, he was rendered just as terrified as any woman would have been. (It really is this bad now in some areas).
I recall reading about this exact pattern occurring in Sweden, many years ago, to girls and women (targeted to be sexually assaulted and beaten, often beyond recognition - I can still recall the upsetting photographs of their bruised and broken faces). It was being referred to as ‘R*pe Jih*d*’ but news of it was being shut down and labelled as (wait for it) lies of the Swedish ‘far right’. [Look it up - it is the same pattern elsewhere in Europe]
I have also read countless comments, over the years, from Hindu and Sikh members regarding this occurring to females within their communities in India but it is called ‘Love Jih*d’ by them instead. Many tried to warn us.
There appears to be a noticeable pattern and correlation/elephant in the room which we have not been permitted to discuss openly, for decades. Why not?
I have not gone out by myself for years as a result of my various past experiences (I do not feel safe enough to). I try to limit chances others could have to harm me by adjusting and restricting my freedoms instead. The irony is that I do that while others can be awarded the ‘human right’ to enter and live freely within our society despite the significant risks they can pose.
🥺
Thank you for discussing issue and the failing services that have apathetically facilitated it all. We need a full, nationwide, [emphasis on] ‘independent’ inquiry into this entire mess and spanning across decades. For this issue and so very much more besides.
Blow the lot open, warts and all, fully.
We should not have to add the obvious disclaimer that, of course, we know that members from all communities can be good, bad or indifferent. Yet we do. Of course there are abusers within all communities.
The concern and reality we have is that some are being protected, by authorities, when they do wrong. The law should be applied fairly, without fear or favour. That is the major contention, not hatred promoting unfounded claims as it is being portrayed by others.
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