Youtube comments of j0elsuf (@SirJoelsuf1).
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Not gonna lie, I've been wrestling with this kind of stuff for most of my life. I'll be 40 in three months. Still living check to check, still one bad break away from moving back in with my folks and just rotting away there lol.
Part of me doesn't care. After seeing my dad die from cancer right in front of me months after I turned 24, I literally stopped caring about everything. Was like "eh, I'm gonna get cancer and die when I turn 50 so who gives a shit?" So I didn't do shit with my life, just partied, dicked around on 4chan, watched hours of pr0n daily, went to college literally just so I could party and bowl on the team, took hard drugs while working grave shift at a gas station. Not a care in the world...Far as I was concerned I was dead by 50 anyways.
That part will NEVER go away. It's SO easy to slip into fatal nihilism after something like that. Counselors/Therapists haven't helped. Seen about 35 of em, very little progress.
I'm just trying to rebuild everything right now. Don't know how I'm gonna do it, don't have a lot of help, but I really don't care. I like it that way.
That said, I don't regret much. I did a LOT of stupid shit until 35 or so but it was all meant to be anyways. I mean yeah if I made different moves would things be better? Who the hell knows. So why waste time/energy trying to figure it out?
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Wanna save your boy (or yourself, if you feel like you are being emasculated)? Stop watching news on TV, stop feeding into the "American Way" of being uber competitive, STOP supporting Hollywood fantasies, and pull your kids out of public school IMMEDIATELY (or drop out if you are old enough). Your precious little system has failed you, so do to it what you should do to any other entity that fails you: LEAVE IT! Am I saying stop believing in God and be a communist? No, cuz they are worse. I'm saying to stop taking everything so seriously, realize that there is a small group of men and women who have set out to hold the world on puppet strings and since you can't just grab a nuke and blow them up, just enjoy the ride. And watch and laugh your face off while everything around you destroys itself from within.
Creating your own standards for success and laughing at the absurdity around you is the greatest success. But if you still wanna waste your energy determining your own self worth by how good your grades are, how much money you make, and how many chicks you have fucked, then be my guest. Go right ahead. I'll be the one sitting in the stands, popcorn in hand, laughing all the way.
"The world is one big freak show. If you are born in America, you have a front row seat."
-George Carlin
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Shimin Shamim You know I actually kinda agree with you. They aren't bad people, really and they are just pop singers. To me they are just harmless really. Swift has gotten better over the years, her latest songs haven't been so bad. Blank Space is quite catchy. The thing with her doing songs about exes etc. is really only slightly annoying but it did get overwhelming. There's a male equivalent to her, a band called Theory of a Deadman and they are perhaps even more annoying, with literally 7 in 10 of all their songs being about being dumped by some chick or some chick who doesn't want to hook up with them. But different than Swift, they aren't talented at all for being a Nickelback knockoff.
What I really dislike about her is that she thinks Spotify isn't paying her enough. Allow me to give you some perspective. My favorite band of all time is Bad Religion. They have been around for 35 years and they made, as a band, a very small percentage of what Swift made and Swift has only been in the music industry since 2007. At an average age that is approaching 50, they still tour, around the world, and play roughly 100 shows a year, each show costing at most $50 and their set being an hour long usually. They are, for the most part, self managed as well. When they were Taylor Swift's age, they were booking their own shows. But why aren't we hearing anything from them? I feel like maybe a publicist told Swift to say what she said about Spotify not paying her enough tbh.
1D are just another random pop group, so that's all I've ever expected of them. I just don't like the music they play, but that's about it.
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lol I agree. It isn't complicated at all. It's like learning how to bowl, play golf, or play poker. There are certain fundamentals that you need to possess and that's about it. The stuff you listed are some of them, I want to put down three more:
4. Learn people skills. How to talk to a total stranger as if you knew them for 5+ years. Best way to do this is to work a sales job for three months. And I mean a REAL sales job: Selling cars, appliances, etc. There are so many boys who don't know how to do this because they're just dicking around online all day trying to see how many lulz they can seek.
5. Organize your expectations, desires, and assumptions of yourself and with chicks. Especially assumptions holy sh1t. Make sure they are HEALTHY and not based on stupid nonsense. NO, that single mom doesn't automatically want you to take care of her kids. NO, that sorority chick isn't going to automatically shoot you down cuz you're not in a frat. NO, not every chick you come across is a raging bra burner who will accuse you of sexual assault after you wave at her.
6. Get TF out there. 16 to 20 per week. ANY chick you are attracted to. THAT is how many chicks a dude who is REALLY interested in improving their love/sex life should shoot for. Love how these dudes go "ZOMG I can't find any chicks!1!1!!1!1" then I ask them "well how many have you invited somewhere last week?" Their answer? Like 5 PER YEAR. Unbelievable.
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Shimin Shamim
Psy was just a flash in the pan. Only reason why he couldn't hold up was because Gangnam Style was just a fad and Gentleman was just an after effect. After he released Hangover, he was already forgotten.
If 1D changed their style they may or may not have the same legion of fans. Same with Swift. It wouldn't matter because in order for them to stay relevant in any aspect, they would need to come out with new stuff on the reg. Music just doesn't have its mainstays anymore because there is too much of it and everyone has ADHD now so artists need to constantly keep putting out stuff, even if they are remixes. Linkin Park is a great example of this. They put out new records every three years or so like any other band would, but were smart enough to make sure to also put out remixes of their previous material.
Look at Ellie Goulding and even Carly Rae Jepsen (who I will admit, is VERY talented). Three years ago EVERYONE was talking about them. But now they are forgotten. La Roux, one of my favorite acts of this decade so far, is now gone but in 2010 you couldn't go anywhere without hearing Bulletproof. The last time anyone has heard of Lily Allen, who was one of my favorite artists in the new millenium, was on a Pink song. And she had like one verse. Like the others mentioned, she waited too long in between releases.
The pace of popular music these days as compared to 15-20 years ago is MUCH faster.
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*****
IMO it went from underrated to overrated just by fanboy influence alone. I don't dislike EB. But CT is simply put, a better game. A lot of EB fanboys think its the best jRPG of all time and it simply is not. Chrono Trigger has Earthbound beat in character development, plot devices, sidequests, and most important of all in a jRPG, Replay Value.
Earthbound has funny dialogue, amazing settings and a groundbreaking encounter system, but at the core it borrows from Zelda (find eight things before the final boss) and Dragon Quest (strictly turn based, each player has clear advantages and disadvantages, spell mechanics only exaggerating hitrates and not damage increases when you hit weaknesses)
Chrono Trigger >>> Earthbound. And this isn't a new opinion of mine, I've been saying this since 1996 when I got both games.
I WILL say this, for a jRPG published by Hal Labs/Nintendo Earthbound REALLY took me by surprise especially competing against the RPG giants that were Enix, Quintet, and Square back in 1995. So if this fact is considered I suppose it could be better than Chrono Trigger.
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Mags chann Well ya gotta understand dude, boys nowadays get more emotional than chicks. They turn into butthurt divas over everything. And then you have madmen like Cho, Sodini, and Rodger who, because of getting "rejected" (keep in mind none of those three ever asked any chicks out ever), want to kill people because they aren't getting their dicks wet. Chicks are being told to withhold shooting down boys cuz of shows like Law and Order SVU, where they feature weird, awkward rapist murderers and chicks in their teens and 20s as the victims all the time. And keep in mind chicks are as impressionable as 6 year old boys no matter how old they are. So keeping all that in mind, would a chick want to shoot down a boy, knowing that the consequences could be murder? That's the new fear for chicks now. Until the 2010s or so, it was "save yourself for marriage or you will go to HELL!!" by Tradcons. Now its "don't tell that awkward boy that you don't like him, he might kill you like Elliot Rodger did!!" by SJWs. Its sad really.
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A buddy of mine killed himself about six months after his 30th birthday in the summer of 2014. NONE OF US saw it coming. No tip offs, nothing. We knew that he was having problems with his girl and was working a dead end job, just slumming around in retail but he NEVER seemed to be affected by that when we hung out. At ALL.
My theory was that he was looking at his life, comparing it to others, and that made him feel inadequate, causing him to kill himself.
To me there are three reasons why mental health is not getting better. 1) Social media has created a perpetual high school environment where you're always under a microscope when it comes to how much social value you have. This DESTROYS mental health. 2) Too much damn jargon. It's why I don't trust ANY counselor. They use too much jargon, it only makes things worse in some cases, and just confuses most. 3) Less emphasis on personal responsibility and more emphasis on ego in our discourse. Thomas Szasz famously said that there is no such thing as mental illness, just varying degrees of irresponsibility. As someone who has struggled with suicidal thoughts from my late teens all the way to my early 30s, I was just as triggered as anyone else was when I came across that statement. But then when I put my ego aside, things changed. I became more responsible and almost overnight I was too busy being responsible to even think of hurting myself.
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Whenever someone goes "so you're saying..." to me, I just agree and troll tf out of them. Triggers them out of their mind to where in some cases I get legitimate death threats. Whenever he hit the bottle, my stepdad would come at me like that. So I'd call him out on it. He'd go "so you're saying..." And I'd be like "...yeah, pretty much." Then he'd go "you know, I can kill you without you knowing it." To which I'd say "I believe you. So when are you going to do this? You know what? Do it now." He'd go on a rant and keep issuing death threats, then I'd just walk away, saying "my back's turned my dude, if you want to take me out, now's your chance!"
I'd say these things with a straight face, and VERY matter-of-factly.
Trolling should be a lifelong class. Let's you know exactly who is addicted to drama and who just lets things go. Protip: About 98% of pretty much everyone you meet is addicted to drama, whether they admit it or not. This same 98% will NEVER follow up on their pathetic "threats." The Joker is a great example of someone who legitimately gives zero fucks. That's what wins nearly all arguments. The person who gives zero fucks has nothing to lose.
Peterson isn't exempt of this either. He LOVES drama. Dude will never be happy.
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Best performance/most fun = Manual
Easiest to drive/repair = Auto
Most fuel efficient = Continuous Variable
My first car was my late dad's car, a 1996 Mercury Cougar with a manual transmission. Had a whopping 17 miles per gallon in 3rd gear, but was able to go 0 to 60 in a minute in some change...in 1st gear. But could go 0 to 60 in less than 3 seconds. V8, 4.6 liters, 315ish horsepower, this thing was a TANK. But boy did it let you know if you didn't shift gears properly lol.
After my dad passed he left me a ton of money and I bought a 2006 Nissan Sentra cash with it. Classic automatic transmission. 6 speed, 4 cylinder, 1.8 liters, 140 horsepower. 25 miles per gallon city and 30 miles per gallon highway, but boy was it boring to drive. Super DUPER easy to maintain tho. Just change oil every 7500 miles or so and you're good. Wasn't like that in the Cougar! haha.
Sentra started to run rough at about 315k miles and needed all kinds of new stuff (new axels, control arms, bearings etc) so I decided to trade it in for what I currently drive, a 2020 Versa. This car is tiny. 4 cylinder, 1.6 liters, only 120 horsepower. Yet it uses more oil than the Sentra did (Sentra took 3.75 quarts, the versa takes 4.25? idk you tell me).
Now yes the Versa DOES have a CVT and they've been known to be problematic but my Versa is already and 90k (bought it at 60k, I do ridesharing gig stuff with it) and it seems fine. Just a couple hiccups over those first 30k. Gets about 35 miles per gallon in the city and a staggering 47 (!!!) miles per gallon on the highway. I'll never forget goin on my first road trip with it, filling it with a scant 8 gallons of gas from 1/4 tank and staring at the 450 (!!!!) miles to empty on the screen after for a few seconds. Like How is that possible on 10ish gallons?
But yes, driving a CVT DOES take some finesse. As the video says it has an infinite number of gears and is continuous. This means you shouldn't floor it/gun it to accelerate or else you'll burn it up. Gotta check the belt. Gotta check the transmission fluid too. I'm flushin mine soon. The Versa goes 0-60 in a painful 10 seconds and it will shout at you every second lol. BUT! If you take it nice and easy, it is smooth as butter.
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Probably gonna get some heat for this, but take some time to pay attention here before getting at me.
As someone who dealt with depression and shitty mental health (anxiety, mood swings, suicidal thoughts, homicidal thoughts) for nearly 15 years (from 18 to 30 or so), nearly any given form of shitty mental health is a choice. It's all about being responsible or not.
Believe it or not it's THAT binary, despite what the hacks, swindlers, and drug lords known as the mental health industry would have you believe.
Never forget the words of Thomas Szasz: There is no such thing as mental illness; just a lack of responsibility. Took me a LONG time to figure that kind of thing out. The more responsible I am, the less time I have to BE depressed. The less time I have to think about offing myself (or others). The less time I have to think about worrying about whether I'm good enough or not.
Again, this is coming from someone who not only struggled with suicidal thoughts from my late teens all the way until 30 or so and even though I have never been diagnosed, I have traits of Asperger's, Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, and even Intermittent Explosive Disorder. So I know what I'm talking about, and I'd wager that I know what I'm talking about more than any "expert" out there.
Yes we need to more away from the narrative of "man up, stop being a bitch" when it comes to mental health for dudes. Cuz there is NO substance in that statement. However, the only thing that really needs to change is the language. The message is fine. Swap "man up, stop being a bitch" to "Make the responsible choice, you are worth being responsible" and we're good.
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Mini blog post as a comment incoming: This is coming from someone who struggled with anxiety and depression as well as self harm habits and thoughts until 35 or so.
It's not really WHAT is being eaten so much as how often. The thing about Food/drink/substances in general is that they stimulate the brain and since anxiety is overstimulation, most of the time none of it is necessary, especially if you don't exercise rigorously every day. Case in point, when I ate more than 2x a day and was practically sedentary in my teens and early 20s, I would get really anxious. This would get even worse if I ate often, like every 2-4 hours, which was a fad diet that I fell for in my late 20s. This would happen no matter what I ate or drank.
Nowadays I do intermittent fasting (A MUST for anyone who has anxiety issues AND is overweight like I used to be back in the day) and hydration. Good LORD are we a dehydrated society. If I'm not active I drink a gallon of filtered water per day. Close to two if I know I'll be rigorously active. Drink your damn water.
For the last 2-3 years I've been eating at most 3x a day (and that's IF I know I'm exercising rigorously that day such as lifting weights/running a 5k/bowling more than three games). This INCLUDES snacks. Most of the time I do meal/snack/meal. Roughly 1200 or so calories total.
As for what I have been eating? Peanut butter sandwich 2 to 4 hours after waking up (I'll take my multivitamin shortly after so that it can work its magic since most multivitamins are fat soluble and there's plenty of fat in PB), a small snack a few hours after that I feel like it, then rice and vegetables (or if I want to save money/too lazy to cook rice for 20 minutes, ramen noodles and vegetables) about 3 hours before bed. If I know I'm gonna cheat I'll make sure that it's the ONLY thing I consume THE ENTIRE DAY.
No matter what, I make sure to never do these three things: 1) Eat too frequently. Four hours is the shortest amount of time I can wait between meals. 2) Get dehydrated: A gallon of water a day is the least amount of water I can drink. And 3) Consume more than 2000 calories. Most of the time I max out at 1500 or so. Again, SUPER important if you have anxiety issues AND are overweight.
tl;dr version: Intermittent fasting + Solid hydration = RIP most Anxiety issues.
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First of all, for the love of every deity in existence, can we PLEASE just say "offline" instead of "in real life?" Like good god damn, why is it a thing to say "in real life" instead of just "offline."
7:30 Yeah Cole, that's a unicorn. Those kinds of chicks haven't existed for about 40-50 years now lol. Might sound cynical, but its just how our culture has changed. For better (it is now possible and even encouraged to talk about sex with chicks now which incidentally gets most of em extremely horny cuz most chicks are "allowed" to express their sexuality now lol) and for worse (chicks now have sky-high expectations of dudes but generally aren't willing to improve themselves).
Some of the stuff here is good, most of it sucks. Five seconds is way too long to wait to approach (three seconds is the longest you can wait and yeah, chicks notice this), you should never NEVER physically ask a chick to be your girlfriend/partner/whatever (those terms speak of a culture that does nothing more than create unnecessary expectations), and buying chicks gifts is incredibly passe to the point where it can and will be counterproductive.
The best way you can SHOW a chick you are going out with that you enjoy what she is bringing is to simply ACT like a good dude towards her, a dude who is willing to show affection and drop his guard, but who she can also feel safe around. Make sure she orgasms AT LEAST once during sex/fooling around. I personally aim for at least two orgasms. If the chick "can't" orgasm that is a blood red flag btw. And if you don't know how to make a chick orgasm then my man, you need to work on that, straight up. Chicks are getting to a place where they are now "allowed" to value sex just as much as dudes. Plenty of PDA when you are around others but not in a forceful way. Talk to her about stuff that still affects you to show her that you are willing to drop your guard. Treat her like she is one of your boys but give her just that much more attention/affection. Chicks LOVE that at least in my experience.
And five to ten dates before sex? Bruh. Just...bruh. Even CHICKS would laugh at this.
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19:45 While this DOES seem unfair, it HAS to be that way. And it isn't even dudes judging other dudes that way. Most of that comes from chicks. Chicks want dudes who are experienced. Shows that they have value.
So yeah, just like you should have certain financial milestones by certain ages, you also need to have certain sexual milestones by certain ages. Same with athletic stuff like weightlifting, running, etc.
Not a big fan of Andrew Tate since he is the biggest asshole I have ever seen on the internet since Jake Paul, but he was talking about this kind of stuff on this platform and he's not wrong about it. Dudes need to prove to the world that they have value. Chicks look for it, dudes look for it, hell LGBTs look for it. In order to create value, you need to play the game...to a POINT at least.
In this day and age you can't just meditate and "rise above" it cuz that doesn't PROVE anything. It's like someone living check to check saying that they're happy even though they aren't financially secure or someone who is overweight who claims that they are "happy" even though they are incredibly unhealthy.
However! When it comes to sex, once your count is somewhere around 7 to 17 (depending on how educated you are on sex and sexual techniques etc) you are good to go. Just like you're pretty much good financially if you make around 90k a year and are generally healthy and fit if your body fat% hovers around 15% (or a BMI of 20ish). That's my opinion anyways.
Exploring where the drop off among ourselves and preaching that among ourselves within our own confines would be MUCH better than Cole's VERY totalitarian solution that he described at the 23:40 mark when it comes to this stuff. Seriously, why is "Hey government! Make this stop!" The ONLY solution ANYONE has for ANYTHING anymore? Be better, Cole.
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As someone who dealt with depression and shitty mental health throughout most of his 20s, this is accurate. And I'd go as far as to say that even CLINICAL depression is a choice. It's all about being responsible or not.
Believe it or not it's completely binary, despite what the hacks, swindlers, and drug lords known as the mental health industry would have you believe.
Never forget the words of Thomas Szasz: There is no such thing as mental illness; just a lack of responsibility. Took me a LONG time to figure that kind of thing out. The more responsible I am, the less time I have to BE depressed. The less time I have to think about offing myself (or others). The less time I have to think about worrying about whether I'm good enough or not.
Again, this is coming from someone who not only struggled with suicidal thoughts from my late teens all the way until I turned 30 and even though I have never been diagnosed, I have traits of Asperger's, Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, and even Intermittent Explosive Disorder. So I know what I'm talking about, and I'd wager that I know what I'm talking about more than any "expert" out there.
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