Comments by "Harry Mills" (@harrymills2770) on "Alpha Central"
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@yukitai9063 ... or by copying Mon or Dad. Most of these boys who act out aren't getting much positive attention from Mom or Dad. And if their Dad isn't around, most boys are going to take Mom's measure by age 10 or 12 and do pretty much whatever they please. Some mom's are stern and consistent enough to pull it off, but mine wouldn't've been, not without Dad to put the fear of God into us.
That's about the age I was when I realized Mom couldn't catch me, corner me, or hit me if I didn't want to be caught, cornered or hit. Dad could run all of us down into his 30s, and proved it. By his 40s, all he had to do was act like he was 'bout to get up, mad, and nobody wanted to test him.
But I saw other kids who obeyed their parents, but weren't under constant death threats from the Old Man. After years of teaching, I've learned that you can demand a lot out of people without dire threats, insults, and a$$-kickings.
That's how I was early in my teaching, because that was how my father taught me. But most people don't thrive under the tutelage of a narcissist. I used to think Dad was just toughening us up for the real world, and I suppose he was, in a way, but looking back, it was all about his ego and keeping us kids feeling worthless, and building himself up.
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