Comments by "Harry Mills" (@harrymills2770) on "Intelligence Squared" channel.

  1. By 14 yrs or so, if your child doesn't self-censor and control themselves, it's too late to teach them. But if you laid the foundation, your child probably DOES become more of a friend, because they're adult enough.
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  2. Yes, Valarie Wolfe. From the destruction of 2-parent households to the replacement of feelings for facts in government-run schools to the War on Drugs. If I didn't know better, I'd say our government's been fighting a war against her own people for decades.
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  3. We inherited a form of child-rearing, which, for good or ill, was what created persistent, cross-generational patterns. I think the '60s generation finally turned its back on "Because I said so!" but 50 years later, still haven't figured out what to replace it with.
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  4. In medieval Japan, a child was indulged in all things, until age 6, after which they were expected to behave as a grownup.
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  5. The right balance of structured and unstructured activities. Kids need to play out of sight of mommy and daddy once in a while, but not to Lord of the Flies extent. Also, disciplining without anger. The kid is still good. The action was bad. Also, probably, do away with the public school system.
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  6. Mrssewhardtoplease: Actually having a keyboard and a computer DOES entitle you to write nonsense. Or do you live in a country where free speech is restricted?
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  7. I think that's a mischaracterization. Sounded to me like she believes there's a balance, and all she's done is tried to find it.
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  8. From my perspective, as an ignorant American, WW I looked more like old colonial interests seeking to maintain their supremacy. France had some real estate it wanted that the Prussians had denied them. And upstart Germany had colonial aspirations that the British didn't like. From my side of the Atlantic, if this debate over Britain's participation is anywhere CLOSE to a tie, then there be NO debate as to whether or not the USA should've been involved. Both Britain and France got what they thought they wanted, but they very much miscalculated the cost of such a "win."
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  9. Depends on the Asian. And I've heard many American would-be musicians whose music I would describe as "digital," which is pretty much what you're saying about "robotic" play. It's a combination of quick-twitch and emotion. Not everybody's wired to play with feeling, and Asians have no monopoly. But probably more Asian parents insisting they keep at it, even when they have no inclination or aptitude.
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  10. But many of them do it by WAY over-controlling their kids, whose genes are JUST as "creative" as us Anglos', but they're just too used to being told what to do. There's a balance between that and the permissive and indulgent neglect you see across a broad spectrum of American society.
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  11. We hold up single mothers as heroines, instead of feeling a little sorry for them and VERY sorry for the children for the bad choices Mommy made.
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  12.  @rickyoldtree  : Human trafficking is under-reported and on the rise, in my humble opinion.
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  13. GENETICS DNA: Sounds to me like the Chinese woman raised her kids in split-personality fashion, first demanding too much, and then resorting to bribery when "Lulu" threw a tantrum and challenged her authority. The key is reasonable expectations and unrelenting insistence that they be met. Sometimes mothers just don't have the spine to hold the line. And, if necessary, the dispassionate (even sad and regretful) assessment of the price - whatever it is - when kids don't hold up their end. They need to understand consequences, so when they're grown up, they know that wheedling, whining and tantrums aren't a viable strategy for dodging their responsibilities. Hard work can be fun, especially if the child sees the reward at the end. Like dealing with Dad, cussing at us (and everything) for hours until we FINALLY got the old Estate Wagon (Buick, 455 cubic inch land yacht) fixed. The payoff? We MEN got to go out on the test drive. And that LONG straightaway where he'd open it up and see what she could do... It was kind of a rite of passage. In my early years as a teacher, I'd hand back tests and read my students the riot act. "This ain't gonna wash! You HAVE to buckle down. How many times did I tell you that the sum of the squares is NOT the square of the sum?!" Now, I'm pretty much always positive. And I'm MORE positive in response to good/better performance. A less-than-perfect GRADE is plenty punishment, enough. And GENTLE remarks regarding concepts involved, on every paper I grade... You don't have to be a hard-ass to maintain high standards. Now, does that mean you should never read the riot act? No. In fact, SOME kids really RESPOND to a swift kick in the ass (figuratively. I was one.), and little else motivates them. Others are so anxious not to displease teacher that the slightest censure can hurt their performance for days. Tough thing about this discussion is every child is different. You can raise Tommy and Samantha exactly the same way, and Tommy grows up to be a doctor, while Samantha becomes an axe murderer. In the classroom, you can't individualize that much. So out with the riot act!
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  14. If they're not hyper-productive, how are we to support the unending growth of government?
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  15. I picked up the trumpet because I wanted to. I practiced a lot because I wanted to get better. In our home, playing an instrument was a choice of the child, and my folks made sacrifices to make it happen. The rest was up to me.
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  16. I actually like John Lennon's "Imagine," and we DO need to evolve beyond nation-states. Trouble is, everyone who seems to agree with me on THAT, thinks that the use of force and central government is how to get there, when we just need the culture to evolve to the point where national boundaries are irrelevant.
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  17. JC1028: I don't think there's a single thing I've said, here, today, that isn't at least half wrong or an over-simplification. But it's still fun to get ideas out.
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  18. Sarah Trachtenberg: Courage, Serenity and Wisdom.
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  19. It's just way too broad a topic to do it complete justice. But some general remarks do survive the test of reason. For instance, we spend more and more on public schools and get less and less in return. THAT paradigm needs shifting (and IS shifting as we speak). More and more parents are voting with their feet, leaving public schools behind. Why is it that when knowledge can be transmitted to millions at zero marginal cost, that costs of education are skyrocketing? (Probably due to state and federal mandates and unchecked growth of bureaucracy).
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  20. Yes. Public schools spend a lot of time teaching very little. They don't know the philosophical linkage between Jefferson and Locke. They've never HEARD of Locke. But they KNOW Jefferson was a hypocrite for owning slaves, and that's all they know. What's amazing, as a college professor, is, knowing the expectation of college EVERYbody seems to have, nowadays, how few American high school students actually come to college with basic college-level math and language skills. Of those who DO, a large subset are home-schooled.
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  21. Discontent is the human condition. Your belly's no sooner full than there's something else you want that you don't have. Doesn't matter what rung of Maslow's ladder you're on. There's always another rung (or another ladder).
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  22. The U.S. should definitely have not gotten involved. We created the conditions that made Hitler or somebody just like him inevitable.
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