Comments by "Harry Mills" (@harrymills2770) on "Amir Odom"
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@Tynab Never deal with your children in anger. Everyone gets angry, but it better only be like once a year or something. If you're angry with your children, they'll be angry with their children.
"Gentle but firm" is the old saying. I see a lot of moms and some dads who want to be their kids' friend more than they want to be their parent. That doesn't mean you should be unfriendly to your kids. But you have to set boundaries and stick to them. Kids will test their boundaries, and if you show weakness, they'll try to walk all over you, forever.
If they can beg and wheedle to get their way after you told them "no," they will beg and wheedle all the time. That's where fathers are supposed to come in. "No means no" dads. There are some moms who understand this, but not the vast majority.
Rather than telling the kid 5 times to do something and getting louder and more threatening each time, just calmly assess the punishment, whatever it is. Kids actually prefer clear boundaries. When you see a kid throwing a tantrum in the grocery store, you know there's bad parenting going on.
You're the adult. Behave as an adult. Too many let themselves be dragged down to the child's level.
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It started with the boob tube as baby-sitter, while Mom & Dad did their own thing.
In many ways, the Internet REVEALS problems more than it CAUSES problems.
Boomers were raised by "tradition for tradition's sake," and rebelled. This left the Boomers rudderless, because they had(have) no clue what to replace the traditions with. Boomer generation was raised in a very permissive atmosphere.
There was a bifurcation in the next generation: Some just became even more permissive and left-wing. Others rebelled against the decadence and hypocrisy of their permissive, self-indulgent parents.
It was only starting in the '70s, but the public-school indoctrination flipped from tradition for tradition's sake, to reject tradition and hop on the Maoist bandwagon, because capitalism is the Great Satan.
I think as a late Boomer, I'd've been better off with private schooling than the dumbed-down instruction that really started kicking in as the hippies became the teachers. But I still got the traditional indoctrination, for the most part.
The Pilgrims would've stayed in Holland, were it not for the schools and indoctrination with which they disagreed that went on there.
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I think it's funny that in the 1960s-1980s, guys started wearing long hair, tight pants (spandex) and frilly blouses, so America learned to register male/female more by physical traits than clothing. I remember the times of "hair bands," where a lot of rockers dressed very feminine, and they'd kick your butt for referring to them as "she." I knew gang members who wore a trademark earring in their right ear, because it was a signal for being gay, back then. The gang did it to prove how tough they were. Being called a gay pejorative was an excuse for them to beat the living daylights out of you.
We learned to be very discerning in those days. But we no sooner learned to look beyond the clothing, hair, and even makeup, to correctly identify dudes, than this militant transgender fragility stuff came along.
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