Youtube comments of The E Guy (@theeguy9022).
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Psychopathy is not a condition that can be diagnosed, only assessed. I don't think I'm a bad person, just someone who has no reason for being other than whatever echoes I seem to repeat back at people who talk to me. I want without knowing why, I simply want to be the best, the richest, maybe just trying to make my reflection mean something more than the skin that I don't really see as mine. The difference between me and the ones behind bars I suppose is insight, my interest in philosophy keeps me questioning my actions and thus not being too easily swayed by impulses.
I do wonder if I could be a good father sometimes. My girlfriend wishes for a child someday, but she seems to forget there is nothing nurturing about me. She hears crying, I hear noise and an attempt to interfere with my personal time.
I'm open to any questions from others, I don't get to talk about this often so I have a mild interest for the moment, if there is no response, assume I stopped caring.
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Personally I adore the usage of ai as a personal tool. Many say this, but they don't mean it, and ultimately I've poured a decent amount into this. The hardware to just get the images I want cost almost a grand, then I spend a couple days to a week or two getting the right models, Loras, prompts, seeds and perfecting the settings for the specific character I want to make.
There is no denying that my sleepless nights to learn how to use it all were easier than your average artist. But nobody will ever see what I've done unless I'm in their dnd campaign. I have hand tremors and figured learning this would be easier than dealing with a condition that causes me pain and ridicule, but that will be overshadowed by the average user of ai putting in no effort at all to get a decent result.
I'm not an artist, my background is in computers, and I simply need a series of images, songs, and backgrounds that I am sadly not able to invest years into producing.
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Think of it like this, if I was to try and describe the concept of nothing, then I would fail as by describing it, it is no longer nothing, does that make sense?. It's a similar concept here as while we do not feel such things, just by mentioning them you interpret them to mean this thing that you feel that we don't. We do often carry detachment to our own feelings, but this is because most of those feelings are a crushing boredom, jealousy, anger or some other variation of them, so we present with the feelings that we see as beneficial, it's completely natural and it becomes easy to play into a mask when you're capable of almost fully believing it
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Respect and trust are two things that are of crucial importance to us, now to clarify, you will not earn either of these on an emotional level, this is an entirely cognitive process and it depends on the person. A powerful line from my partner for instance was "If I treat you as less than human, how can I be surprised if you act that way?", I gave them my trust in knowing what I am, they gave me their vulnerability, so it's in this situation that I feel comfortable and that I'd like to keep this person close. I do not feel loneliness, but there are very few I can trust with what I am, so it's a wonderful outlet to talk about these things with them and even more so when I get to involve them with my passing hints for fun, it's a small secret we can both have fun with.
So when it comes to the others, I'd say dealing with psychopathy is as easy as staying firm, remember that you have selective empathy for a reason, you do not have to care for everyone and you do not have to play the games presented to you. If you're friends or even lovers with one then remember that everything that is between you two is either entirely or almost void of emotion, do not be surprised when they do things that might seem utterly cold or if they fail to realise something they've done is vile, if you're their lover it might be a good idea to gently bring to their attention what they are, then you can propose a "mask-off" time so to speak, which you may not like but it would be good to help them rest and be more pleasant in general.
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I have had a few partners in search for one that would be able to handle such a relationship, and thankfully I have found one. I do not love them in any sense that people might usually do so, I can feel excitement when they do the things I'm into, I can feel comfort in knowing I can trust them, but in the end my "love" is entirely cognitive. A large part of our communication is done through actions as while I am capable of producing something that would stimulate feelings for them, such things would ultimately provide nothing for me, so physical acts and gifts are important to me.
Some of my favourite times and when I am allowed to take off my "mask" so to speak, when I can make no more efforts to carry typical responses, it's not something my partner likes but they understand that I need such time to collect myself. In the end however, despite saying I do not love them, I do appreciate them dearly, they're something I may think of fondly when they're gone, but even when they're dead I'll feel no need to mourn.
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