Comments by "calledtoanswer" (@calledtoanswer) on "The 3 ingredients of the honeymoon phase" video.

@luv.my.pencil477 Don't try to explain yourself to dysfunctional jealous people lol. Sounds like you both take a mature level-headed approach to your relationship. I hope your relationship continues to grow and flourish in stability! Do you both have positive examples from your parents relationships or were you just determined not to experience the same negative interactions you witnessed growing up?
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@luv.my.pencil477 i love that for you guys!!! I know how hard it can be to break the cycle of dysfunction our parents display. May sound weird, but i am really proud of y'all for being able to do that! 😁 ❤ That legit put a smile on my face! 😀 Keep up the good work! I wish you two the best!!! 🌠
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What an amazingly honest and self-aware statement! Good that you recognize your "heated moments" and his understanding. I hope he continues to be understanding and that you become more secure in your own ability for understanding. I hope it does keep getting better and better!
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I hope you are doing okay. It's always tough when a relationship ends. Maybe things would have been different if you saw the video earlier, maybe they wouldn't. Keep growing as a person! Be the best "you" and things have a way of working out better FOR you. Time is on your side!
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Not trying to be mean or cynical, but it doesn't sound like you have a very in depth relationship. Sexting and sex have more to do with infatuation than building a lasting relationship. Don't get me wrong, both of those things are great, but you should have more substance if you want a lasting relationship. Hopefully you can learn more about each other in this phase and maybe build some other bonds to add to the relationship. I think you will find that when you add depth to your connection, the sex can actually get even better. Rabbits have sex all the time, but intimacy and passion are formed through deep connections. Tough question to ask, but i hope your boyfriend also asks how you are doing? Wants to know about your family? Asks about your dog or cat if you have one? Can tell if you are having a bad day? Knows your favorite ice cream? Cause not trying to be the bearer of bad news, but if he doesn't talk to you about more than sex or sexting, then he may be in it just for sex. Make sure a guy wants all of you, not just your physicality. Hope this doesn't seem mean. I am not trying to hurt your feelings. I am just a guy and i know we can be shitty human beings sometimes.
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@CritticalAngel Glad i didn't hurt any feelings! Interesting that the desires were "swapped", but happy to hear you made a decision you felt was best for you. You (and everyone) deserves to have someone love them for their totality! I get that sometimes relationships can be "just physical" and that's fine if it's mutual, but like you said, you wanted different things and it's tough to be compatible if you aren't on the same page. You made a mature decision. I hope you find what you are looking for when you are ready for that type of relationship! 😁
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@tamar1ta I hope it works out for you. I obviously don't know your situation beyond what you have written. I can relate to not dating around and planning to wait for "the one". I hope he earns the loyalty you have shown and treats you well!
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I don't think anyone is ever really okay being alone. We are social creatures. But i know what you mean. I would definitely say your feelings of codependency are more the part you want to focus on. More than likely, the codependency is rooted in some childhood experience. Being able to recognize the inception of codependency is often the greatest hurdle. In the long run (marriage) there will be a healthy level of codependency. That's the main concept of marriage, that two are united as one with common goals and mutual sacrifice. Also, worth stating, sometimes people are made to feel "codependent" because the other person is emotionally unavailable. Be sure that it "really is you" and not just being a bad judge of character and a shitty guy made you feel shitty about yourself. Unfortunately, some shitty men out there thrive off making women feel "insecure or needy" as a way of controlling, manipulating, and ultimately unwilling to commit to a relationship. I say all that to say, it's definitely good to be honest with ourselves about our shortcomings, but don't be too hard on yourself. If you do feel codependent in an excessive way, don't be ashamed to seek counsel or therapy. The biggest benefit of talking with someone is they can track progress with tangible goals and give external feedback when you may be too hard on yourself internally. The best news... you are seeking answers. You will find them! Be patient with yourself! I bet you are a wonderful soul!!!
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I feel this 😂 I love giving and getting back rubs. It sucks when the back rubs stop lol I really messed up when i let go of my ex that used to give me foot rubs too. Granted, it was usually real short just so i would reciprocate, but still much appreciated. Great... now i want a foot massage lol
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@cactus1694 i've always loved giving head to toe massages. And i agree. Definitely makes you feel loved. I have male friends that complain about giving massages. I never understand that lol
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There is no "normal life" even for those that have not experienced abuse, but you can have healthy relationships and live a healthy lifestyle. I think the answer is complicated and nuanced based on what you may have been through, but don't feel you have to attain "something you see in others", because most people only share their "best side" with the public. As long as you feel safe and happy, you are succeeding! I hope you find that place of peace and security ❤
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Definitely not good to hold things in, but i don't think she is advocating "pushing things down". More about expressing feelings/thoughts/concerns in a healthy peaceful manner. It's possible to discuss emotions without getting emotional. The key is empathy. As long as we seek to understand each other and not just focused on being understood, we can have healthy dialogues without turning into full blown arguments. Arguments are like a slow release poison in relationships. Little by little, they cause decay and eventual death. And i'm not talking about small spats over what is for dinner. My grandparents were married for 60 years and they would have "arguments" that lasted about 10 seconds over what time dinner would be ready.
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You're 19. TONS of time to find someone. Invest in yourself (your mental and physical well-being) so you can be your best self when you DO AND WILL meet someone. Be patient.
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😂😂😂
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That's a long time to be committed to someone that is locked up. How long did you date before he was locked up?
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Not weird. I bet you are a fiercely loyal and affectionate person once you get past that 2-3 months. People that care deeply for others and have a lot of love to give are usually slow to give that love away because it takes a lot out of them. In my life experience, people that are slower to open up are some of the best people i have known! I bet you're an awesome person too!!!
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