Comments by "L.W. Paradis" (@l.w.paradis2108) on "3 great untruths to stop telling kids—and ourselves | Jonathan Haidt | Big Think" video.

Yes, this presentation is very superficial. As for trusting your feelings, I defer to Gavin de Becker, The Gift of Fear. Everyone should read that. There are times when your feelings tell you to get the hell away from someone. Trust those feelings.
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@matthewatwood8641 How ridiculous. Precisely what "anti-fragile" means is highly context dependent, and may vary with age, temperament of the child, and the nature of the surrounding community and the larger society. We're not dealing with protons and electrons, or billiard balls. Among other things, I object to referring to ordinary teasing as bullying, OR treating the latter as the former. Everyone laughs when they go to a school reunion and reminisce about the teasing they endured. No one laughs about bullying. It's like the difference between a rude outburst followed by an apology, and a true threat.
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Exactly. Gavin de Becker, The Gift of Fear. Everything you said is perfect.
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@brettansley8600 People here agree that there ARE situations where his advice applies, but these principles are not universals by any means.
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@alexxx4434 Intuition is ultra-rapid non-discursive pattern recognition, and it is a gift. Among the most precious we have.
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@matthewatwood8641 Actually, my own issue has been taking too much responsibility for the actions of others, and that is obvious to anyone who is astute. I don't care how I come across to you. You're not doing too well in meeting your basic reading and thinking skills responsibilities. No one can do that for you. Blocked.
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@mystuff9999 How is that an example of intuition rather than fear, which is frequently unfounded?
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@bobmcbobbington9220 The popular book Blink explains it well in lay terms. Ultra-rapid nondiscursive pattern recognition: that's what intuition is. As for distinguishing between maladaptive fear and the instinct that could save you, try The Gift of Fear. You think you know things that you don't. What's that like?
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I think that's right, but I also suspect that many people find it too scary. I hope not.
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@michaelduffy3866 Concerning "your gut," I would defer to Gavin de Becker, The Gift of Fear, on exactly when to trust your feelings. There are many times in life when your gut tells you to get away from someone. Believe it.
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@matthewatwood8641 The irony is that Westerners in general and Americans in particular are so high maintenance, but this anti-fragility discourse has you obsessing and "correcting" others who have more sense than you do. For example, twice I did not so much as cry about a grim diagnosis -- and both times it turned out to be wrong, of course. Maybe you need to toughen up? But that would be you, not "everyone."
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@matthewatwood8641 Well, now we know why there is a mental health crisis among the youth . . . And a reading comprehension crisis among just about everyone.
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@matthewatwood8641 I know. Blaming the latest mass shooter for killing your kid is just trying to shift responsibility. Your kid is your problem. /s At some point, a perp is to blame for what they do to others. A better example: the idiotic COVID policies of the government most certainly harmed me and others. Of course we now have to deal with those problems on our own. The problems I'm left with are all mine. Closer to the topic at hand, concerning workplace bullying: when it is severe enough, most European countries have criminal statutes on the books and will prosecute it. Civilized people take it seriously. Here, people line up to make a buck with dubious "self-help" rants. Support that. See how it works out for you.
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@matthewatwood8641 I don't see that being the target of criminals is a challenge that a minor child should have to face, least of all in school. That doesn't mean it has to defeat you. That's not the point. My parents met in a refugee camp, so I know something about overcoming real challenges. It still would have been better had there been no Hitler.
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