Comments by "Magic Beans" (@Magic_beans_) on "The Onion's Future News From The Year 2137" video.

  1. I particularly like how the characters’ names appear to have been culled from food advertisements (Zesty, Vitamin, Perfomance). Puritans named their children for Biblical characters (John, Leah, Habakkuk) or pious attributes (Prudence, Silence) because that was their great ambition. In the future, what we want most is sustenance.
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  2. Yes there’s some dumbing down of things, like “6 Senators Killed Dead!” But also languages change, they always have. The first newspaper in what is now the United States (Boston 1690) was titled “Publick Occurrences Both Forreign and Domestick”. My guess for the next 100 years is that English grows more phonetic, shedding more of its French & German roots. Perhaps we’ll also develop (with or without conscious effort) a dialect for international use, richer in loanwords and using simplified grammar.
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