Comments by "Blah Smith" (@LittleMew133) on "PsycHacks" channel.

  1. "The degree to which a person can grow is directly proportional to the amount of truth they can accept about themself without running away."
    222
  2. I feel like betrayal stays with you, like forever. No matter who it is done by. Always in the back of your mind.
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  3. I mean, can't say you didn't warn her. I am always baffled by how people treat their closest people the worst, which means 0 sense to me. Like they put on a fake smiley mask for outsiders then come home and beat up their partners - I am confusion...
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  4. What I have learn so far: people really hate free lodging in every sense.
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  5. I think before filing for divorce, do a divorce mock trial. Like get separated for like a year, and see if you actually miss each other. Maybe it was other factors that led to the stress and hatred. My uncle and aunt separated but remained legally married, and they got back together. That was 20+ years ago; they are going to retire in a beach town this year.
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  6. Aye new ironed shirt. Congrats on the shirt and ironing upgrade.
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  7. I don't get it.
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  8. My philosophy in developing or more honestly, just keeping the "goodness" I was born with (thank you universe), is that: Everything (health, wealth, status, etc) can be taken away from me, but they can't really take character away from me.
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  9. Having NEGATIVE emotions in your voice may magnify the negativity back to you. Having positive emotions like some warmth and twinkle in the communication may nullify any existing negativity. My dude, listening comprehension is more than just hearing the sound waves in the air.
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  10. I think the danger is in misplacing the emotional attachment via falling for fantasies; perhaps, in people who don't actually want committed relationship with you; perhaps, in someone who doesn't see or accept you for who you are. Once you find the right person, after you yourself can love an accept yourself - maybe it's 6 months or 6 years, hope it's not 60 years, it would be worth-while.
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  11.  @roses6564  Then they should learn to practice authenticity in all aspects of life. There are plenty of ways to be polite and pleasant without being all fake and smiley.
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  12. Some women love drama. It's their life blood.
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  13. I think the more you like someone, the smaller the compromise looks, even if it's the exact same compromise. So if you don't like your partner AT ALL, something small like not getting your favourite dish for dinner becomes a HUGE deal to throw tandrum over. Because you feel like you already compromised to be with them, someone you don't authentically like, any further compromise feels like too much. On the flip side, if you like them, being with them is more akin to a privilege and not compromise, so your compromise box has lots of room for other compromises.
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  14. Step 1. Apply Step 2. Take the course with mentor Step 3. Write good thesis and defend it Step 4. Get degree Step 5. Set up business with said degree Step 6. Set up YouTube channel Let me know if you need clarifications due to low estrogen level.
    10
  15. This is by far the most insightful guest.
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  16. After my Dad passed away from lung cancer when I was little, I never felt so ... alive. Everyday I and other loved ones had to live was like a miracle - what a blessing. Everything was more vibrant and beautiful. All problems pale by the weight of death.
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  17. Mentally and emotionally strong people don't run from the truth, for long.
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  18.  @roses6564  I think it's the passive aggression + irritation is the issue. Being straight-forward yet non-offensive, geared at improvements / problem solving is the way to go.
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  19. I think the ability to be alone and not lonely is the ultimate saving grace that everyone should learn.
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  20. But do crazy women honor restraining orders? They are too crazy.
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  21. I mean can anyone love anyone they do not respect? I feel like basic respect precedes.
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  22. I wonder why I turned super mega existential starting teenage years, but I was such a content at-peace child.
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  23.  @LM-xh2sd  Can confirm, my Mom stuck around. Tried all kinds of treatments for my Dad.
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  24. Bro, that business would go out of business fast. Another dude would start another firefighting business that actually put out the fire. You know, like actually do their job?
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  25. Also, how did that dude get a monopoly on the literal firefighting profession? A rather primitive market if you ask me...
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  26.  @psychacks  Do you know of firefighting departments that don't put out fires, and put on real estate bids instead?
    6
  27. I cannot tolerate willful ignorance. I think that's the worst kind of way to waste away your 1 and only life, in a daze of self and other deceptions to pass the days. Lies lies lies. More lies to cover up your initial lies. At the end, your life is nothing but a series of lies. You have every chance to create meaning yet you leave behind only meaninglessness.
    6
  28. Enneagram theory is great for dissecting these core fears. I'm basing this on my own 541 enneagram fears: - Enneagram 5: I'm not independent or competent enough. - Enneagram 4: I'm not unique or special. - Enneagram 1: I'm a bad or corrupted person. But when sheet hits the fan (in my mind), I just have to remind myself of the theory and realize "oh, it's a pattern".
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  29. I think there is a difference between "get caught in conflict" and "starting conflict". If I am caught in conflict, I 100% expect my partner to come to my defense.
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  30. If you're really bad at stealth mode, you draw attention. It's true; I'm the living proof. You don't want to be friends, like real friends with people, whom don't value you as a person. It's unstable and won't last. Friends can have interesting chats with friends without needing to film and monetize that content.
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  31. But the ones who pretend to be sweet at first are the real danger. They are very calculating, and usually aim for material comfort; using the men as vehicles. Naive young men tend to fall for these tricks. Until the realization dawned on them, they have wasted years of their lives and brought children into the world. So be thankful that they show you who they really are within the 1st 3 dates.
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  32. Wtf, you need to take her to get mental health checkup. That's not normal. I mean my grandma did that before onset of dementia.
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  33. ​ @cosmictreason2242  I agree with this approach actually. Compromise should result in overall greater gain, even if not equal for that moment. I think people mistake compromise for meeting righr in the middle, which might be worse for both.
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  34. "The odds of being attacked by a cat with a tank are low, but never zero." Many people with cheating spouses never suspected a thing. Comfort and failure are both located in unfound level of security and certainty.
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  35. You think dating apps is conventional dating? That's kinda dystopian mindset. Conventional dating is meeting people organically in your daily life, not swiping across a screen.
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  36. It is very hard to be happy when sick. But some people's bodies just get sick at every chance. I was borned 1.5 months premature. Had to be in incubator. I was diagnosed with -6 near sightedness to perfect vision when I was like 4. Couldn't see the TV. I used to get nose bleed, I kid you not, every single day until I was 10. Then it was more like a monthly occurence. If I went on motorbike rides without wearing a mask, 100% would get sick the next day. I was on and off antibiotics through childhood. Without modern medicine, I don't think I would be alive right now. So it would be really hypocritical of me to bash medicine. Medicine had came a long way from lead covered pills but everything is trial and error. Psych meds are still new and developing.
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  37. People who lie to appeal tend to go down several common routes. One is that they succeed in the short-term, but over time, the layers of the onion peel away to reveal more and more of the true self, which is not pretty because they haven't been working on it since they poured all their energy into appearance. Or, they hold themselves back and seem like a hollow shell of being; they just exist but not living. I try to not become either and to avoid both, because the former is kinda dangerous and the latter, boring.
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  38. My motto is "if you hate me, at least hate me for who I really am". Basically, I want to fail hard and fail fast. I dump all the disclaimers out as soon as I find the appropriate opportunities, front-loaded the entire disclosure process.
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  39. You people need to understand ✨compromise✨ You could have asked her to recommend female authors based on your interests. And she could have given you a list based on what she saw on your bookshelf. Instead of arguing percentage vs raw number. Like seriously, can't even solve a minor problem - how are you gonna navigate anything else? You both subconsciously valued your interest above each other. Perhaps better to not see each other again.
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  40. You know that psychology is a soft science, and many popular beliefs have been proven to be questionable / incorrect over the years, right? Don't take a one person's words as the bible, because you will likely find faults in them 1 way or another down the road.
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  41. ADHD is scannable. Hello?? "Traditionally, ADHD is diagnosed by a combination of psychological and physical evaluations, sometimes including lengthy questionnaires or tests. But over the past two decades, research has shown that the brains of patients with ADHD look different than the brains of people who don’t have ADHD. These differences show up on various brain scans in multiple types of imaging, including a functional MRI, called an fMRI. In a recent study, brains of children with ADHD showed alterations in three regions (the left temporal lobe, the bilateral cuneus and the area around the left central sulcus). Within those patients, brain scans also showed differences in patients with different subtypes of ADHD: inattentive and a combination of inattentive and hyperactive. The distinctions had 80% accuracy."
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  42. No, a date is a marker in time - duration in which the sun rises and sets.
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  43.  @roses6564  I agree with your view point. Do you have any reading suggestions for PIES compatibility theory?
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  44. Should have annulled the marriage right then and there. Can only go down hills from there. Once a faker, always a faker.
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  45. Please stop grouping totally normal women with the women you know. Frankly, they sound like they have IQ of a caterpillar. I know plenty of beautiful, smart, hard-working women. Ask yourself why you don't see these women. Birds of a feather flock together.
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  46. Fighting isn't all bad. I think it's when there's no longer any fights, just silent looks of contempt and distance, it is over over.
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  47. Here's a little biscuit of wisdom: "Type 4’s vice is envy. 4's often compare themselves to others, contributing to their sense of lack and shame. 4's tend to believe that others have what they themselves do not and they also believe that things come more easily to other people. This vice keeps Type 4' heavily focused on what they believe they’re missing. They spend considerable time yearning for something outside of themselves that they feel would benefit them—often the love and approval of others. Type 4's are sensitive, creative, and expressive people who are interested in finding and understanding their own identity. But this search for identity can be a major source of stress because Enneagram 4's want to know they have a special purpose in life, and they want other people to recognize that as well. It’s important to be yourself, even when you’re facing stressful situations. Trying to act like someone else or pretending that you’re not overwhelmed as an Enneagram type 4 is not going to help. Understanding who you are and what causes you stress, however, can help you to find the peace and fulfillment you’re looking for and avoid those situations that get your head spinning. As Type 4's move toward personal growth, they start acting like a healthy Type 1's, the Perfectionist, a serious, responsible, organized person who seeks to make the world a better place for others. Enneagram type 4 needs to feel valued and accepted for who they are and to recognize their own unique identity. By taking time out to reconnect with themselves and using their talents and drives, they can leave stress behind while they become the compassionate, creative artists they were meant to be".
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  48. I'm against pedophilia. What am I trying to hide? And how am I benefiting?
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  49. It's like hearing drunk guys at the bar talking 😂
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  50.  @Meowch3  Thanks :D
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  51. Those women who think they are the hotshots and entitled to superstar treatments are going to have real tough time with time. By that, I mean their only value is their looks and aging ain't so great on them looks, you know? With time, the only thing remains is their horrible personality and entitlement. But the difference is nobody is offering to buy them a drink anymore. Don't be that woman. Be better.
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  52. You got heated by hate comments from recent interviews again? Why do you expect everyone to respond positively when you hold strong controversial stances? Push backs are expected, so expect them.
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  53. I think envy gets a bad reputation. All emotions are neither good or bad. Apathy is horrible. I think envy is only destructive if you wallow in self-pity and/or attempt to bring the other people down, instead of rising to their perceived level. Competition isn't bad; we love a good competition in sports, don't we? It's foul plays that we don't like.
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  54. Can I make a wild guess? After watching a dozen of your videos and interviews, I'm going to guess you're INFJ (strong N over S leaning), enneagram 5 with avoidant attachment style. I don't believe MBTI is liked AT ALL in psychology field, but experimentally speaking, I do see the patterns play out in people in real life.
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  55. I think you should go to therapy. You speak exactly like someone with avoidant issues.
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  56. Lol I think you need to meet more people with different points of view. There are men who are willing to throw way more than 5 figures.
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  57. Me with slight Asperger's: "... oh no."
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  58.  @psychacks  Just do math. Aren't you supposed to be good at that? Value created > cost = profit. "Nothing ventured, nothing gained".
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  59. Idk about you, but I go on dates to see if there is a genuine human connection. You buy prost to get laid. Your reality does not override others' realities. Theory of mind, young fellas.
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  60.  @robertdeland3390  sorry, I didn't understand what you just said. Can you rephrase? 😭
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  61. I don't think older women venture into this corner of the interweb, do they? It is targeted towards young single hetero males.
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  62. I'm pretty sure I have mild ADHD. But guess what I did to combat my attention deficit through school? I studied in short bursts instead of long hours. I made colorful doodles to otherwise boring lecture notes. I never kept any deadlines in my head, but noted them down on a planner I carried around. Your brain is naturally leaning a certain way doesn't mean you cannot do something about it??
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  63.  @VivatVeritas1  Literally proved that it is not circular reasoning. That the brain is wired differently from birth. The egg came first.
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  64. I agree about never ever mention material goods as if it's the only thing good about yourself; it's super trashy. I know a guy whose family member is like the regional (US Northeast) manager of 1 of the Big 4 companies. All that ever came out of his mouth was "look at this Italian leather seat in my car" or "expensive summer through Europe", etc etc as enticements. Not ONCE did I find him remotely attractive, more like "I would slap this mf if the law allows me to". Let your personality speak and your wealth whisper.
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  65. Do you have a video on how to get more angry? How do I substitute the sad for the angy?
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  66. Is also a skill. You can practice to get better at it.
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  67. I was going to say, the currency isn't always money. But you covered it. I don't ask much in the way of money, but on the flip side, the man has to be smitten with me enough to willingly die for me. You're right that all men pay, but they pay differently.
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  68. I'm cackling
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  69. You think being aggressive during courtship, pushy for marriage, and overclaiming spouse's asset in divorce are bad? How about decade-long stalking to get the ex, who already re-married, back? Sounds like material for Hollywood movies, but actually true story.
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  70. Whoever is "dating" after 50 and still think they need to find "excuses" on how to live life, it's MEGA FKING CRINGE, dudes. SUPER CRINGE. Grow up. Go to therapy. Like REAL therapy not this woowoo dating coach sheet.
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  71. I agree! I will somehow tell my Dad to go back in time and not to propose and married my Mom 6 months into knowing each other. I mean then I wouldn't exist, so that would create a time travel paradox and a whole nother split version of the universe.
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  72. I am upset at pickup-ers because they interact with me. Like "please sir, I am simply trying to buy some caffein; why must you terrorize me?"
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  73. Type Four—Levels of Development Healthy Levels Level 1 (At Their Best): Profoundly creative, expressing the personal and the universal, possibly in a work of art. Inspired, self-renewing and regenerating: able to transform all their experiences into something valuable: self-creative. Level 2: Self-aware, introspective, on the "search for self," aware of feelings and inner impulses. Sensitive and intuitive both to self and others: gentle, tactful, compassionate. Level 3: Highly personal, individualistic, "true to self." Self-revealing, emotionally honest, humane. Ironic view of self and life: can be serious and funny, vulnerable and emotionally strong. Average Levels Level 4: Take an artistic, romantic orientation to life, creating a beautiful, aesthetic environment to cultivate and prolong personal feelings. Heighten reality through fantasy, passionate feelings, and the imagination. Level 5: To stay in touch with feelings, they interiorize everything, taking everything personally, but become self-absorbed and introverted, moody and hypersensitive, shy and self-conscious, unable to be spontaneous or to "get out of themselves." Stay withdrawn to protect their self-image and to buy time to sort out feelings. Level 6: Gradually think that they are different from others, and feel that they are exempt from living as everyone else does. They become melancholy dreamers, disdainful, decadent, and sensual, living in a fantasy world. Self-pity and envy of others leads to self-indulgence, and to becoming increasingly impractical, unproductive, effete, and precious. Unhealthy Levels Level 7: When dreams fail, become self-inhibiting and angry at self, depressed and alienated from self and others, blocked and emotionally paralyzed. Ashamed of self, fatigued and unable to function. Level 8: Tormented by delusional self-contempt, self-reproaches, self-hatred, and morbid thoughts: everything is a source of torment. Blaming others, they drive away anyone who tries to help them. Level 9: Despairing, feel hopeless and become self-destructive, possibly abusing alcohol or drugs to escape. In the extreme: emotional breakdown or suicide is likely. Generally corresponds to the Avoidant, Depressive, and Narcissistic personality disorders.
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  74. I find relationship with myself like a solid 7 out of 10. It helps that my Mom is cheery and always shows me how to appreciate the little things in life like her gardening or watching the sunset; my dog and hamster are hecking adorable. So I only entertain a relationships (friendships or otherwise) that are 8+. Otherwise, it's a step down from my current position. Also, stop banging people you don't want to catch feelings for; them chemicals are stonk.
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  75. I feel like the narrative is being a bit twisted here. The divorce rate is already at 50%, so 50% of the couples that failed at IVF getting divorced is you guess it, exactly average. The divorce is not the result of the failed IVF, like being narrated, at all. There seems to be such a strange narration going around that the only value of men is money and women, reproduction. Much of this theory has been challenged all the way back in 19th century, where questions were posted against the biased assumptions of primitive tribes' behaviors twisted by the oppressive Victorian views of that time. You know the famous biology guy, who advocated for sex within marriage for reproduction only, lived during this time? That's right, Charles hecking Darwin.
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  76. Precisely. And many women want "a bad boy who's just good to her".
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  77. Are you talking about Dom, sub, and normal person? 😂
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  78. I like Joker. Dude asks deep questions about society. And seems like he's always having a blast.
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  79. Same actually. I wonder, do you have the same level of self-compassion? Because I feel like sometimes, those 2 things are at odds with each other.
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  80. It doesn't have to be zero sum. Is beauty not still beautiful regardless? To know that flowers blossom and exist in this (cruel) world - is that not a comfort in and of itself? Why does it have to be torturous unless it sits in a vase in your home? I find solace in knowing people who perceive and experience the world (both enjoying and suffering) similarly to me. Human connections do not add up to zero sums.
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  81. "Religion is for people who fear hell, spirituality is for people who have already been there."
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  82. ​ @Meowch3  Wth... can you put your thoughts into a book that I can purchase and have on my shelf?
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  83.  @Meowch3  In which order should I read his books?
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  84. Do you find people idolizing you ... act kinda weird? I don't think you can have a genuine convo with a fan like you can with a friend.
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  85. "What are you¿"
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  86. ​@BEAST.420G Yeah, but they suffer with dissonance while we don't. If the social mismatch is the price to pay for authenticity, I'm willing to pay.
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  87. Love is dopamine, serotonin, oxytocin, etc. Prob can be medically induced.
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  88. Idk if that's related to aimlessness. I'm not motivated by external things like admiration, fame, money, status, etc. But I respond pathologically well to goals. Like just give me a goal, directly or indirectly, and watch me get there in world's record times while ending with a triple back flip, metaphorically speaking. I think the whole working towards something keeps big questions like "is life really worth living?" away. Apple a day keeps the doctor away.
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  89. 3 parts on escort, the heck?!
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  90. Bruh, you missed an important point. What if the 2 guys don't have the same requests and preferences?? Comparing oranges and apples, then make some random conclusion is inevitable route here XD
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  91. I don't think high value women go to bars to get attention. They already have attention. I would guess that no matter who you approach at the bars, they are going to be a little less high value and a little more responsive.
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  92. Holy, word salad 🥗
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  93. Can't relate. I'm goal oriented. Hate frills and wasting time. People who put on a show to "prove" themselves to others ... make me roll my eyes. It's not like their IQ isn't apparent?? Have you heard stupid people ramble? It's very clear they are stupid.
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  94. Don't get me wrong. I like professionalism, and aesthetics. If an actual company hands out flyer that looks like it was made by an 8 year old on Microsoft Word... Or with zero understanding of business etiquette. That's not OK. But once there is a professional minimum, the rest is just add-on's.
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  95. "All good things were formerly bad things; every original sin has turned into an original virtue." - Friedrich Nietzsche We arbitrarily deem something as "good" or "bad" depending on how we feel about it, and whether or not it support our goals. Genocide does not feel like genocide in the moment; only coined such name in history afterwards.
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  96. Me when I was just born: shut my lips so tight to not drink enough milk to meet quota. Me a little later: "Mom, this story is stupid; the King is a greedy person who didn't let his daughter choose." Me not long later: beat my kindergarten teacher to pulp for lying to parents about how much she loves children. Safe to say I am a menace to society from the moment of existence. Very difficult for me to just accept things as they are.
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  97. You know what I think is really weird with the English language? Instead of saying "my wife is pregnant", the husband says "WE are pregnant". Like he is not physically pregnant or suffering, but get that title in spirits?? And also, "I give her a child", like BRO it's not a gift; it's a mutual agreement and quite frankly, huge responsibility. But I think such phrasings only exist in the US? As far as I know, UK doesn't phrase it like that.
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  98. You're built like a blue piller but for some reasons, you choose to play red pill games. You don't understand your own kit.
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  99. You would be surprised.
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  100. Am I the only one that almost never fantasize? My brain doesn't fill in the gaps with fantasies, but almost like ... logic. People (who are interesting enough) are like puzzles to me, and I want to put the pieces together. Completely disregarding what I want or don't want in that person. I guess this is why I'm decent at reading people?
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  101. Also, 3:33. Why do people get with people they don't really like? YOU'RE NOT EVEN THAT EXTROVERTED? Is being by yourself THAT terrible?? I don't get it.
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  102. Omg that's very me. I think people with that mindsets make GREAT teachers though. Because they can see, guide and encourage people towards certain paths.
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  103.  @jwdsax  Depends on context and tone. "I have been working so hard at the office. You have been home all day? What did YOU do today?!". Totally different.
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  104. I remember petting a dog in someone's backyard while the party was going on. Random dude striked up a convo, getting weirder by the seconds. So I asked where the bathroom was and hid in there for a while. Excellent strategy, would recommend.
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  105. Idk what dark magic compells every guy that I talked to, to want to take me back their home city when their home cities suck ass?? One idiot bought a house according to his family members' tastes and recommendations, not even slightly alligned to his taste or my taste. Like he anchored our future upon some random people's frames. Zero braincell has been used. Negative IQ territory.
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  106. Have your parents ever told you that you're very stubborn? Or "I told you so" after you ran face first into the wall that they told you existed?
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  107. Did your Dad ever turn around and say "good job" at all? I mean cannot really argue with progress and results. Or are you guys still "no talk me, I angy" at each other for a couple of decades? There are mf's who tear you down on purpose, and then there are those who try to stop you from "pursuing your dreams" because they worry about your security. You cannot lump those 2 together blindly. And also, life is not that long and anything can happen at any time. Just saying.
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  108. So base on this, will you please be my friend and companion? 🥲
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  109. Aye, you cycled through all the new shirts in the pack you got.
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  110. That dude is so bad at math and logic. How did he even get into MIT? Did he use the national average probability of female math enthusiasts onto the fking MIT campus??
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  111. Confidence is overrated. That is why Silicon Valley investors keep on getting tricked by these supposedly genius start-up personalities, with nothing to show but a grandiose display of confidence. You don't need confidence to do much of anything. You just need competency and willingness to try.
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  112. Then there's me: "I like fried chicken, perhaps we can have fried chicken for dinner." I just realized that FUDGE I WAS THE VICTIM OF RELATIONSHIP CREEP. SPREAD AWARENESS EVERYONE.
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  113. The whole universal "ideal" image is BS. My Mom and grandma specifically wanted soft men, who are emotionally available and family oriented. Just imagine golden retriever puppies with good reading skills. But if my Dad and grandpa had pretended to be someone they weren't, those unions wouldn't have happened. When you are yourself, you risk not appealing to certain demographics. AND IT IS FREAKING WORTH IT 100%.
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  114. If that friend REALLY likes you, they create environments for you to hang together. Like "hey, wanna go to the bar or gym together?" Unless they just like solo time, if they invite others and not you, then you know where you stand. Humans are not rational creatures, never, not even a little. There is a study on patient who damaged the feely bit of their brain, and he was unable to make the decision to turn left or right, since left or right have the same rational weigh. So if you can still turn left or right, congratulations, you are not (completely) rational.
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  115. Yup, hence the song "Love Just Ain't Enough".
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  116. From university onwards, I was BOMBARDED with Red Pill ideology. It's the dominant view in US Northeast anyhow. I don't see such stress in inter-sex relations amongst my European friends. No true segregation between the sexes. They are much better socialized from a young age.
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  117. I don't entirely agree with your view or Red Pill as a whole, because you're saying personality does not matter whatsoever and that is just not true. You're assuming people are entirely rational beings that go for profit optimization, but in another video, you admitted to going for bat sheet crazy batches. So you disprove your own point, that in fact, you never optimized, for yourself. You just sniffed out the --- crazy (pheromones? shared experiences? who knows?). See?
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  118. Jokes on you, I basically supervised and raised myself for 2 months while I was 6 years old. Maybe that kinda explains my fudged up attachment style idk 😂
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  119. Chris, why didnt you choose the chick that flew across the world to be 5 minutes away from your workplace. You know Im just a rice farmer, metaphorically 😊
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  120. Read the fudging book recommendations 😡
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  121. BAHAHAHA I'm actually deceased, because you're mf right. Get an expressive warmth in your voice, and some twinkles in your eyes and I'M SOLD. This is very dangerous information for the public LMAO
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  122.  @MVProfits  In traditional Christianity, women are taught that they are objects belonging to men. I think in the vows state they must obey their husbands? And God has created them from men's ribs or something idk, to serve the men. So yeah, get brainwashed for a bit, and you don't have any self-worth too.
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  123. I think the whole "where am I compared to other people" is prevalent for SO dominant and secondary. If you're SO blind, like I am, it doesn't affect you in the same way. I was bottom of my class for a while because I transitioned into fully speaking English classroom and "er me Enrish wusnt gud" you see. Many others who were not SO blind expected me to feel 1 way or another, like ashamed or self-pitying, about that. But looking back, I was more blind than a bat - apathetic in every which way. All I really cared about was to learn as broadly, deeply and quickly as I could. I gave 0 care about my rank within the class or whether or not everyone else understood that paragraph and I didn't. What I notice SO dominants do is that they care a lot, like ALOT LOT about their images; it's more important for them to APPEAR admirable than BE admirable quietly, if that makes sense? They rather place themselves into a tiny pond to feel like they're the best, than venture out into the ocean and realize they aren't. Ain't me, never was me, never will be me. I am SP dominant so I do care a lot about my bodily health and security. Gladly go live in the woods like Henry David Thoreau, where there are no people or scale to measure yourself against - completely different value system.
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  124. P/S: I moved myself slowly but surely to the top of the class. And soon enough, I was on par with and bested native speakers. Got scholarship and invited into academia societies. When you focus on you and the race with yourself, you will surpass pretty much all other people who are simply trying to talk themselves up, instead of actually doing the thing.
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  125. But overall, I do agree that taking actions towards concrete external goals is the best route. Even if social recognition ain't really your jam, doesn't really hurt.
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  126. SO dominants are usually pretty obvious to me, especially compared to a nearby SO blind. SO blinds usually say these things to SO dominants "bro, nobody cares about you THAT much??" or "why do you compare everyone and everything??" or "all this drama is exhausting, don't you get exhausted??" If you have thought about or said 1 of these things to someone, congrats you are in the presence of an SO dominant while NOT being one. Sorry for your loss, truly, because you will never experience peace ever again.
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  127. This is why I make it a point to hiss even though it's not in my nature. Though, I do find the ones that actually bite (aka assholes) pretty cute.
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  128. Oh! I know a chess Master and he's a real condescending asshole lol He majored in Pscyh at uni too, and teaches chess on the side.
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  129. Stop hypnotizing people please. Where art thy morals?
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  130. "When you stand for nothing, you fall for everything" - Alexander Hamilton.
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  131. I can guarantee you no men worth dating, had ever looked at a bum-like woman with no jobs, friends and hobbies and went like "wow, she's attractive". Never happened in history. Because those women are, repeat after me, b-o-r-i-n-g.
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  132. THOUSANDS of options?! Holy sheet, I'm going to back out of that vicinity immediately, because ... social anxiety.
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  133.  @psychacks  Yo Orion, can I work with you? :D So you know that Christopher H. O'Brien guy? He thinks that I won't fall for another person no matter what. Wanna test that theory? Come to Ho Chi Minh city; we can go out for some coffee and discuss philosophy. Or are you into the cultures and the arts like I am? Did I share the story that my only relationship was with an ex that stole me from the guy I was talking to at the time? I will admit I have a precedence bias, but I'm not so stubborn to not let the universe intervene and change my mind.
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  134. Nothing is less attractive than adults who cannot think and act on their own. My college professors pretty much all said "I know you were taught up until high school to ask permission for everything, including being allowed to use the restroom. But if you're going to do that with me, I'm going to answer "idk, can you?" to the question "can I use the restroom". You're all adults now, learn to adults".
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  135. Clearly haven't met Canadian women.
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  136. Understanding is both ways. If you're an asexual with a sexual person, it's like "yeah, I understand ... but I don't like". LMAO you don't have to accept what you understand.
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  137. Stop exchange the meanings of words. Just use the Oxford dictionary definitions and many problems could be avoided.
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  138. I cannot NOT ask: did the whose child it was situation get resolved? 🥺
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  139. Apparent, genders only exist in US? ​ @marktapley7571 
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  140. I is psychologist? Woooow xD
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  141. Here's some tips for you guys: assume the worst, until they prove you wrong. Not the other way around. I assumed my love interest would never be interested in me, is an uncaring asshole, is a player, values work and everything above me, is a broke ass who cannot afford to send his potential children to university, etc etc. And I still like the bastard. But then he proved all of those assumptions wrong, so they become extra perks and not the foundation to the connection.
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  142. Oh no. Why you do dis?
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  143. Close your ears, Chris. It is not true. Everything is just a dream rofl
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  144. As a daughter of 2 pharmacists, I will not stand medicine slander. Treason! Also, take some magnesium y'all.
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  145. Truth helps people make "correct" decisions, for those who want to make decisions at all. Lies are for losers who don't wan to make decisions, and just want to pretend everything is sunshine and butterflies.
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  146. I think women or jusr anyone at all, should stop using emotions to justify their bad behaviors and to manipulate. It's not classy.
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  147. "Spend hours staring at thin strips of processed pulp covered in lines of dried ink" - thanks, I feel offended.
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  148. Idk why age matters? Confused. Just a couple of hundred years ago or even now, people marry 12-14 years old girls while being like 40-60. It is fine for the time and religion apparently. 🤷‍♀️
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  149. It's the lesson of "don't shoot the messenger" or else, he won't deliver jack sheet info anymore.
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  150. We all want good sammiches
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  151. I feel like it's uniquely US guys' problem where they don't know what they want. Probably due to US marriage laws being kinda ass. And the push for independence from a young age, so they don't have a strong sense of family like in Europe and Asia. US was the frontier for independent explorers after all.
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  152. On the other end of the spectrum, extremely traditional Asian men get married so his parents can have grandchildren. The women are just the vehicles for children. No need for personality, charm, wit or bonding either. Opposite end of the spectrum to independent US men, but the women' roles are more or less the same.
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  153.  @russ9921  Which country are you from? And which legal system did you divorced under?
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  154. BAHAHAHAH so the whole women using sex as a bargaining chip to keep men around after fudging them over is a real thing? HAHAHA I thought it was just a cliche HAHAHAHAHAH I guess this is the difference between women who have good command of logic vs bad command of logic. Can't rationalize or justify? Just lay down naked, I suppose.
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  155. And then there is my INFJ uncle who dated 10 chicks at once, and none of them realized. Found perfect reasons to dump them as he saw fit. Single-handedly traumatized his little sister aka my Mom in the process. What a mess.
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  156. Haha, if I was mugged in NYC by teenage boys like I feared, I would have been like "take it all, leave me alone". I feel like people who do drastic sheet like going half way across the globe are the ones that have some kind of existential crisis. And to have existential crisis, you need to think a lot, and have more than 5 braincells. Good job, you're not a dumbass.
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  157. Did you just publicly denounce the physical act of shivering to increase body temperature? Respectfully, what the hell?? It doesn't even make any sense. Like mashing a bunch of words together in some vague fictional scenario to produce somewhat poetic string of words. Shivering is an evolutionarily adaptation and good for survival of species.
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  158. .................................................................................. Sorry for misunderstanding, not actually single, already have love interest. Went on these video to study. Some of the comments were left for said love inferest. Christopher O'Brien, stop stalking me on all my accounts. Are you my love interest or not, you weirdo stalker? 😅
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  159. Btw, I have the capacity to care for other human beings in completely non-transactional ways. Everyone wants advices from the therapist, yet nobody asks how the therapist feels. You are enough, as you are. Don't need to prove jack sheet to anyone, anywhere in society. Disregard your parent or peers' disparaging comments and opinions about your personality or mannerism or whatever else. Stop carrying those around - that is their problem, why are you making it yours?? I know A TON of male INFJ's with long-term partners. My Dad was an ENFJ who cried at little things. They are absolutely exactly perfectly fine the way they are, so are you. I am willing to spam this message over and over, as exposure therapy.
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  160. ALSO, you could have just said "acts of services" is a big love language for me. So when you do simple things around the house for me, like doing my laundry. Even if it's a simple act of putting clothes into the washer, it makes me feel cared for and loved. WHY CAN'T YOU JUST SAY THAT INSTEAD OF ... ALL OF WHATEVER YOU JUST SAID?? You know you are allowed to like things and have personal preferences, right? You don't have to disguise personal preferences under some kind of intellectual or societal veil. Do you see children trying to reason and convince you why them liking strawberry ice cream is the correct path in life? NO, BECAUSE THAT'S RIDICULOUS. Stop acting ridiculous and own up to what you like and don't like.
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  161. ALSO ALSO, stop trying to craft intricate complex social thesis, hoping to be proven false. You could have just said "I say to you today, my friends, that in spite of the difficulties and frustrations of the moment, I still have a dream. Now is the time to rise from the dark and desolate valley of segregation to the sunlit path of [gender] justice. I have a dream that one day this [planet] will rise up and live out the true meaning of its creed — we hold these truths to be self-evident: that all [humans] are created equal. Let us not seek to satisfy our thirst for freedom by drinking from the cup of bitterness and hatred. The whirlwinds of revolt will continue to shake the foundations of our [planet] until the bright day of justice emerges. We refuse to believe that the bank of justice is bankrupt. When we allow freedom to ring, when we let it ring from every village and every hamlet, from every state and every city, we will be able to speed up that day when all of [universe]’s children, black men and white men, Jews and Gentiles, Protestants and Catholics, will be able to join hands and sing in the words of the spiritual: “Free at last! Free at last! thank God Almighty, we are free at last!" Because isn't the weight of cognitive dissonance so very heavy?
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  162. ... Wait a hecking minute, did you use suggestive hypnosis on me? This is absolutely mal-practice >:[
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  163. Who tf went on the teacup ride 50 times in a row? I'm concerned for them.
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  164. Because the cow is hella cute.
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  165. I hope for honesty and authenticity. Do you? 😮
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  166. I love A Room of One's Own 😢
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  167. Chris, you would cook for me and hire maid, right? 🥺 Just my adorableness pays itself out of debt? 😆
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  168. Chris, you're technically my boss, aren't you? Just letting you know you're a dumbass who listens blindly to authority, and makes the same kind of mistakes over and over. Wake up, get good. (Still love me? 🥺)
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  169. The more you learn about science, history, culture, etc the more you will realize whatever many people preach as the truthest truth or immovable rules are ... more or less zeitgeists, and mostly made up.
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  170. Depends on the company. Jeff Bezos's wife weathered with him through early Amazon days, where they stayed awake together to pack orders. Just for him to cheat on her after 25 years of marriage. And also have yacht full of who-knows-what's.
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  171. The problem occurs when both people are "F U this is me" kind of people 😂 Battles of will draw out for years, and they're both strong-willed 😅
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  172. The heck is hysterical pregnancy? The sarcasm here is cackling.
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  173. It really depends on your personality and judgement, but yeah, I recommend (nice) guys to not jump the gun into marriage (under US laws). I know people who marry people who verbally and physically abuse them, cheat on them, and still get half of their hard-earned wealth after divorce. Sounds a bit like a scam even to me. If you're iffy or concerned, get a prenup that outlines that the other party forfeits any extra earnings (that they themselves could not have earned during the course of the marriage - think giving up career to be stay-at-home) if they violate certain conditions (abuse, cheating, etc).
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  174. @klaaspekala6804  oh dont worry, me having slightly average to above average experiences rub people wrong all the time. Jealous people think they deserve things more than me, while they don't spend an ounce on hard work or discipline. They don't even cultivate a pleasant personality, or at least dont spread nasty rumors and bully others. Then they wonder why no men like them. Idk maybe they are not stupid?
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  175. If you find out the secret, you'd be a billionaire. Divorce lawyers hate to see you come.
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  176. No 2 people are exactly identical. Never happened in history, ever.
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  177. I have 541 tritype, with 4 5 6 over 95% match. Out of the bunch, 4 has given me the most identity but also has caused me the most trouble. Before I was aware of it, I had episodes where I was being extra EXTRA melodramatic, like breaking down sobbing at spilled milk - the literal kind. My poor friends had to console me over a meltdown like every single month, on minimum. Just putting this info about there for anyone with core 4 or strong wing 4 to gain awareness.
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  178. I don't have the first kindness in regard to people who have pissed me off prior. Basically, I go like "told you so" or "well well, guess who's reaping what they sowed". I do have a lot of the second kind of kindness, again, to people whom I deem appropriate. I used to make a whole ass study plan for my friends to raise their grades. Truly busy body works right there.
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  179. At 1 point, I was thinking about mortality like every single day. It was er unproductive, to say the least. So a trick that I use to get out of analysis paralysis that is tied to mortality is to ask myself "if I were to live forever, what would I do". And paradoxically, it works. I have a streak of self-sabotage, because I thought "things were going to sheet (death) anyways, might as well". But what if ... it never goes to sheet, and I would have to live with that choice forever? I think twice before I self-sabotage. It's a weird little mental trick but it works.
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  180. Totally agree with the statement that (some) people DO respond positively to the whole "hey, I really like you, would you like to go out with me?". In fact, my 1 and only relationship started just like that (I'm not NOT a picky person). People like people who are like themselves, to a certain extent. So if you play a lot of dumb games, you're going to get a lot of dumb lovers / partners. You're maximizing your chances to the wrong demographic that you (hopefully) want to stay away from.
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  181. Idk about other people, but I don't even like more than like 3 people (of all ages and gender) at any given time. Like 3 is the max, a lot of the time, it's 0. So exclusivity is not expensive to me. There is almost no opportunity cost, because the rest aren't real opportunities in my eyes - I hate them all xD
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  182. Had no insecurities about bantering with Grad students as an Undergrad. I preferred them. They had more than 5 non-drunk braincells.
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  183. Me: I don't know any of these examples...
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  184. I'm proud of you. You got so far ✨ (You're a proper psychologist by profession. I am an unlicensed one by heart).
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  185. Repeat after me, guys: "strong opinions held loosely, not loose opinions held strongly". I don't get ANGY unless some party (people, animals, environment, etc) was harmed. I'm okay with people becoming monks; I'm okay with people having 7 wives; I'm okay with people wanting to be called they/them. But if I see someone randomly kick a puppy, I have beef with them.
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  186. That would be quite interesting
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  187. I can sense who can take a truth hit and who cannot. By cannot, I mean the people who would give me hell for stating literal facts that can be Googled. I avoid those people at every and all costs.
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  188. People don't analyze movies and other artistic medium?? That's absolutely bizarre. What missed opportunities. I don't believe such people exist.
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  189. Being human is extremely difficult. One of the only living things to understand the self when seen in a mirror, and account for the amount of time left. Wewy biggie questions, much existential. Ever since I was a wittle child, like before I could read, I have a calling to do philanthropic work. If I can eventually set that up, I would feel that my life has immense meaning.
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  190. @xerf84  hhhmmmmmmm
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  191. Batman is different from Joker. Batman became a "hero" because he wants to rid of crimes. His loving parents were mordered by criminals and left him all alone in the world as a small child. So he wants to create a world where that cannot and won't exist. The intrinsic motivations are different even if the characters do seemingly similar things.
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  192. Woah, the DSM5 is smol. I thought it would be like a massive uni textbook with air-thin pages.
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  193. Are you sure you didn't pass out?
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  194. I would like to add not just the absence of emotions, but also absence of mind. Hard to explain why such absences feel so anxiety-inducing, in certain instances. I think if you're a naturally worrying person, learning that emotions are temporary and use distractions like meditation and reading, would help.
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  195. - "Those with the highest walls, have the deepest love." - "Kintsugi, or Kintsukuroi, literally golden (“kin”) and repair (“tsugi”). Kintsugi is the process of repairing ceramics traditionally with lacquer and gold, leaving a gold seam where the cracks were. Pieces are put back together to form a new whole - the "scars" are then covered with real gold. Behind this is the idea that all things are unique - and breakage is not the end." As a fellow INFJ 5w4 (with prob the worst attachment style possible), I understand the guarding and the pain. I had to make the choice between head and heart, and I chose the former. You can say I have been there, done that. At some point, I genuinely thought that relationship might be forever. Spent the next however much time learning about myself and human psychology and inter-relations. Where did it go wrong; how do I not repeat that? But may everyone's pieces be put back together in gold, with more beauty and depth than before.
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  196. Nice Christmas shirt.
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  197. Are you trying to sell me on a gay dating sim?
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  198. How do you meditate meditate? I do the half-price version via painting or walking, ie flow state. But I cannot really just sit and focus on my breath.
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  199. Haha no, I left with HIS Netflix password. Ex let me continue to use all of his accts but I was so pissed, I deleted them all from cookie 😅
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  200. Chris, you're a mf dragon chaser.
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  201.  @SALTYCOMBATDIVER-ExInstructor  Peterson is governed by the Canadian board. I think they are stricter over there.
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  202.  @georgeelder8415  Wot from Boston? The idiot sammiches?
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  203. I was an idiot and I want to remain an idiot. It allows you to see past the superficial rules and really understand human and human connections.
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  204. That's why there's the stereotype that people who peaked in highschool go downhill from there.
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  205. Don't you want Victorian values? Women are not allowed formal education or to work. She is only taught home-making skills. And whether or not she starves is depended on whom she marries. She cannot own properties, even if they once belonged to her parents. Also, if 1 of her family members does anything horrible at all, somehow her reputation is fudged too. So she starves. That seems nice. I'm sure many women would love to experience that era.
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  206. I think for TV, it's around 7PM
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  207. I would say Western men are quite the romantics, especially compared to men raised in the East. Sure, some sleep around when young, but when they commit, they really do mf commit. The lyrics "ain't no mountain high, ain't no valley low, ain't no river wide enough" prove to be true with them.
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  208. I'm more worried about why tf the dude proposed to everything that moved LMAO
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  209. Chris, are you bullying random poor sick man on the internet? Stop it.
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  210. People have bestfriends as adults? DAMN.
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  211. I feel like each person defines "nice" differently. To some men, being nice is being a yes-man or a pushover. When I say I like assholes, I mean I like guys with spines that don't flinch at the prospect of being hated.
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  212. Most relationships are just label based. Ask married couples what they like about each other - nothing. Nothing is their answer.
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  213. The humiliated self thing is just masochistic tendency, that needs a dom. Trust.
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  214. Specifically the "service sub" category.
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  215. Does this tie up with the findings that DNA isn't fixed, but certain portion turns on/off depends on externalities?
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  216. Sounds like you're sick as heck. REST.
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  217. "Tradition is peer pressure from dead people"
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  218. I would start laughing at the collision. Y'all need to get some humor into your veins.
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  219. Like just THINK, there is another fool out there having the bright idea of canoe-ing on a very very foggy day. JUST LIKE YOU, LOOK AT THAT!
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  220. Also, you need to separate out the FEELING of confidence and the DISPLAY of confidence. Usually people who display the most confidence lack inner guidance and confidence, so they over-compensate (think salespeople, guru's, etc). If you watch interviews with billionaire investors and techies, they do not display much outward confidence; many have really awkward habits. HOWEVER, when they dive into their missions and strategies, you KNOW they feel confident in their abilities. How do you decipher fraud vs genuine? Read their minute body language and eye movements.
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  221. This is why I end my sentences with "idk I might be crazy though".
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  222. My motto is more like "time is not the master of me", which completely negates the amount of time I have. Can't lose if you don't even play the game.
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  223. Are you a child of "I have your back, you have mine" union? Lucky for me, I did. But guess what? That puts me and anyone else who does at risk. There are many MANY children of transactional relationships. The only thing they know how to do is to follow their parents - to transact. Even for their closest relationships. That is the norm for them. That's why you need to learn to read people, not as men vs women, but as each and every individual. You will not win at their game, so don't even attempt to play. Just don't play.
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  224. If you're unlucky and are not the result of such unions. I am the living proof that such unions exist. My grandparents and my parents are prime examples. Cheers!
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  225.  @davepazz580  Yes it does. That's like griefing people for not giving you apples when you asked for oranges? Match your actions with your words and your desires are important adult skill to have.
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  226.  @davepazz580  Then why didn't you ask for a whole fruit aka a virgin? Make it explicit you only want virgins or nothing at all. The result would be you're either handed a non-bitten fruit or no fruit at all.
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  227.  @davepazz580  Common sense also tells me that most people don't walk around demanding only virgins... That's perhaps the thing in 18-19th century.
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  228. My Mom used to tell me that a good indicator of how genuine someone is, is how awkward and clumsy they are in front of you. Never trust a smooth talker because their feelings aren't strong enough to make them act weird.
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  229. You're going to be like a father figure to me? 🥺You're not old enough; how about big brother?
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  230. I just think, if this person is here right now, do they really want to see me inflict myself with more grief? Absolutely hecking not.
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  231. A very important point is that you can't just accept any virtue the culture and time tell you is virtuous, you have come to that conclusion yourself. Some things that goes against the mass can be virtuous in its own rights. You can only stand tall against the rocks being thrown at you when you're anchored in your own values that you distilled yourself. Every value you holds is for yourself, as oppose to for show.
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  232. Your age range for dating is plus minus 15 years? That's very open minded 🤔
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  233. INTJs don't engage in lengthy verbal sparrings. They cut people down, sharp and swift. Basically just tell people to stfu and move them out of the way of their goals. I think INFJs are mostly barks but INTJs are mostly bites.
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  234.  @cosmictreason2242  "ideological enemy in public forum" - real INTJs give 0 fudge about such nonsense. They don't mind disagreements and they definitely do not mind "the public". They don't have high Fe.
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  235. TROPHY WIVES BE QUAKING!
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  236. Aw, that's kind of sweet actually haha Once you realize your dog is special because he is yours and your memories built together. You don't demand the rest of the world deem your dog as special, then you are at peace. One person's taste and feelings do not have to extrapolate to the rest of humanity. That's maturity and ability to view the world under different lens.
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  237. You cannot control emotions. You can fight them tooth and nails, or you can welcome them in and watch them pass.
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  238. No relationship. Just a viewer. Parasocial maybe.
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  239. This is going to sound strange, but I don't think most intelligent men want obedient women. Obedient women are the ones who cannot think for themselves, and those are a dime in a dozen. Like water at restaurants. But believe it or not, in Europe, restaurants charge you for tap water. Many men also don't want children, I know, crazy. Best case scenario is when the man wants the woman for who she is, and the children are simply the byproduct. Which is the opposite of the woman being a vehicle for the children. Don't be the tool, be the goal.
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  240. My Mom used to tell my Dad "you can piss me off because I let you", and I think that is just so true since she gives 0 fudge about many people.
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  241.  @rainbowodysseybyjonlion  You don't notice he wears many old wrinkly shirts?
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  242. Definitely not cow milk. Most cats cannot have dairy.
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  243. Chasing Cars is so nostalgic.
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  244. Dude, if I have personal relationships like the one I have with my boss, it's the most un-fun relationships ever - why would I want that? Sarcasm is hella fun, have you tried it?
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  245. A therapist support you via you paying them. You give them 100% of the money, as in they give you 0% of their money. And they in turn, give you 100% of the advice, as in, they don't go into a session expecting advice from you. That's impersonal; they in fact, gives 0 actual fudge if you die tomorrow or not. Hopefully, HOPEFULLY, you want a partner for personal reasons and not for the transactional side of things. You want to share in burdens and duties, regardless of the specific resources, in your PERSONAL lives, because who knows, stock market is going to burst tomorrow and HOPEFULLY, your partner won't dip on you like your therapist you haven't been paying.
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  246. You get physically intimate with whom you consider 🐕? Pretty that's illegal in most countries. Idk, maybe consider companion of your own species.
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  247.  @1Whipperin  If you cannot spell basic words, you are a kidergartener baby 🐥🍼
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  248. I think it has to be looked at case by case basis. Example: people with a J in MBTI and enneagram 1 needs to stop thinking and start doing. And vice versa, people with P and idk enneagram 7 can benefit from a little more thinking before doing.
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  249. I play games. Have you heard of League of Legends?
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  250. Wait wth, wanting to be competent and building an empire with someone is NOT a good thing?? WHAT.
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  251. The art looks so nice
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  252. Wait, so based on this logic, gay people are the laziest?
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  253. Don't men's brains mature like on average 3-5 years later than women's? People probably want people on their wavelengths, rather than how many times they have looped around the burning ball of helium and hydrogen.
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  254. YOU HAVE LOTS OF BOOKS THERE. WILL YOU DO BOOK RECS PLEEAAASEEEE.
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  255. This "why do men like bat sheet crazy batches?" is the exact flip side of "why do women like assholes?". My problem is no matter how much "healing" I do, I still like assholes. I think it's just in my genetics.
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  256. I mean I always glared back and was still bullied. So idk this technique doesn't seem to work for me lol Perhaps, it works in the case of men and not women?
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  257. WHAT ABOUT MEEEEEE???
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  258. Aaaah, okay, now I focus on listening... I would say you should separate out personal life and work life in your analysis. Work life is entirely transactional, and personal life is certainly not close to that level. Gratitude is often expected and expressed in personal life, but almost never in work life. You hear stories of people sacrificing their lives for their loved ones all the time, but never for their bosses. Muddling these 2 parts of life would be ... strange.
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  259. ... Talk about inappropriate disclosure!
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  260. The book The Midnight Library talks about the paths un-taken. I think the conclusion to the book is very comforting.
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  261. I have been thinking about this topic for a bit, backburner kind of thing. And I think this whole obsession with virtues is a very Enneagram 1. But the problem with this line of thinking is, there is no nuance; everything is black and white. And the black and white-ness is very ... arbitrary, a lot of the time. Enneagram 1, or at least in my case, cares broadly and equally. Like I care about people and humanity, and am willing to make certain sacrifices to be in line with my beliefs. But if you really think about it, that's really very fudging stupid and idiotic. My Mom told me this when I was in middle school: "okay, that's nice, but about how people who love you and me, who raised you??" The inability to think and act in a simple-minded, tribal-istic way is both a pro and a con. The flip side of 1 is maybe 8. 8 can also champion people, but not entirely indiscriminately or equally. They are willing to "wage wars to make peace". Enneagram 1 thinks "oh, you are another consciousness, I treat good", but 8 is more "you prove yourself trash, no deserve".
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  262. Kinda like an idealist getting lost in the details of principles and a realist getting there via a few questionable routes. But in the end, can we really say who has done more cumulative "good", if that was the end goal?
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  263. His name is Conan??
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  264. OMG, I just realized why a small percentage of BIMBO/HIMBO seem like they are the majority? There's a saying in my mother tongue that translates to "empty vessels make the most noise". Or another saying in English: "intelligent people are full of doubts, while the stupid ones are full of confidence". The dumbass 10% speak so goddang loud, it envelopes the remaining sensible 90%. And let's be real the sensible 90% aren't really trying to consume contents about how to get laid; they're probably already in long-term relationships. Selection bias, if you will.
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  265. You, in fact, can earn or buy tax breaks. Example: if you provide low(er) income housings in certain areas, you get gov grants and/or tax breaks. Similarly, donations are deductible from taxation. I'm sure there are countless other ways that I don't know about. So yes, technically, you can negotiate. Just not in the pity party way you're talking about.
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  266. Why couldn't you put the teleprompter far away instead of ... the rest of the setup? If you guys ever need someone to think good, hire me. I think pretty good. Any field, any problem. Contact me.
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  267. Except music. I am tone deaf. Anything else though - finance, econ, law, psychology, art, etc.
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  268. Idk dude, Korean dude was always away on "business trips", never home, and yet he couldn't stand his Taiwanese wife and filed for divorce. They already never saw each other, like never. They couldn't tell you anything about each other except their ethnicity and they could reproduce, that's it.
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  269. Everyone should have autism and cut back on the BS. World would increase in productivity and fairness by at least 1800%.
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  270. Who is allowing or not allowing me to talk about what? Law, God, the "cool" kids? Most shackles are imaginary.
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  271. I'm ded
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  272. I agree with Roberto that characters who get punched by life but punch back cheerfully are the best characters. I aspire to be like those characters. People can never guess the sheet that I have been through based on my mannerism. I'm not faking my bubbly-ness. I just don't want to be defined by what happened to me. "Such wounds to the heart will probably never heal. But we cannot simply sit and stare at our wounds forever".
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  273. The vocabs he uses are prob too complex for children.
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  274.  @mattvideoeditor  I agree. It's a lot less rules-based in Europe and Asia. At least, from my very limited experience and observations.
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  275. You don't know the subtype of men that like to break cute things? They are the first half of S&M.
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  276.  @extra2ab  I would say being alone without feeling lonely is easier achieved by some people than others. Extroverts tend to need people to feel energized. In Enneagram theory, self preservation dominant (me) are generally pretty content alone. Just depends on the individual.
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  277. Yeah Orion, when are we gonna talk about neuro-transmitters?
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  278. Someone legit went like "yeah, she cheated on her partner with me. Now, I am taking her on as a partner. I'm sure this will end well for me."
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  279. Science is just 50% making sheet up with confidence.
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  280. I think a stable relationship requires a certain degree of selfishness, even just on a somewhat superficial level. Need to balance out internal self love and outward love. The word "love" in English is so confusing, because of the whole Disney mirage. I think the word "care" is a better representation.
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  281. Does it not depend on your personality? Some people cannot work under pressure while others thrive on it.
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  282. Step 1: stop calling dating the sexual marketplace
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  283. Dude, that MIT dude needs to scrape the "live near me" criteria. All he gotta do is go to math conferences around the country. BAM! At least 100x the chance. Work smarter not harder.
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  284.  @patricksullivan1827  Well, having middle managers is already a waste of ... every resource available. If the company is so large, they should make it flat/horizontal with different specializations instead of keep on going up and up with random nodes in between. There are plenty of stories of techies, who transitioned into middle manager roles, complaining that they went from being useful at coding and creating projects to now ... just sitting in on random meetings all day that produce nothing.
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  285. The funny thing is Asian parents are guilty of constantly saying their love is conditional, yet act like it's completely unconditional. So your poor brain is confused.
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  286. Can attest to this truth.
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  287. ​ @CBraximus A title can only dictate so much.
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  288. Most people are way too un-interesting to occupy that much space in my mind. Most people are like blobs to me.
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  289. I find this so funny, because I have dealt with people who talk way too much and do too little and also the opposite. Gotta find the balance in the middle.
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  290. I'm so grateful for my upbringing in a culture soaked in Buddhism, because the whole compassion for the universe and everything in it feels ... so natural. Only went through 1 breakup in my entire existence. Sucked ass actually, 5 stages of grief, the whole shabang. But even in anger and resentment, I always wish them well and health. I think because Buddhism teaches acceptance of things as they are, and not because they are yours or not yours. You can care for them as another human being, a flicker of consciousness in the universe, without having them as your partner. Feels very peaceful.
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  291.  @Christine-j7b  No thanks.
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  292. I think many men mistakenly think that ALL women are inherently irrational, and will go out of their way to be emotional terrorists. I beg to differ. My Mom is many more times more rational and level-headed than my emotional Dad.
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  293. "To see, we must forget the name of the thing we are looking at" - Claude Monet. Not sure if the passing of loved one example is from your own life. If it is, sending virtual hugs 🫂
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  294. I don't mind the hustling; business is business. But you know what grinds my gears? Imagine people claiming to be on great terms with you to influence other people's decisions. They know they never had and never will have strong influence, so they gotta attach your name into the sentences for power boost. Like "bro, use your own ass reputation and leave mine alone. You're tanking my elo and I didn't even queue with you".
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  295. Ooooh. No, I'm not encouraged or praised by anyone. I just have mole rat tendencies from being a Self-preservation Enneagram 5.
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  296. Schools should have mandatory empathy courses for kids, as young as kindergarten. This info but somehow simplified so children can grasp it. Maybe some practice examples scattered in. I think that would greatly reduce hostility and bullying in class, at school, at work, everywhere else in society.
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  297. Speak not of Calculus. My brain decides that Algebra is enough. We need not such witchcraft as Calculus.
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  298. Hard disagree. Dogs know gratitude. Elephants mourn loss. Dolphins play. All for no gain. I'm sure 2 legged apes that are us can too.
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  299. Wait, so men cheat for no reasons? Wack.
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  300. Also, you seem to have a lot of problems with anger after all that meditating in rural Chinese temple? Defintely do not take humor well. Can't remember the last time I was truly that angry about something so minor 🤔
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  301. British women: "man, American men have 0 sense of humor. Is that why they have no luck with the ladies over there? 😮"
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  302. I recommend the book "Come As You Are" to better understand non-accordance in female sexuality. Just because something is registered in her body as relevant, doesn't mean that's what she actually wants, psychologically speaking.
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  303. Wait, so men cheat for no reasons? Wack.
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