Comments by "Thump Er the Sweaty Fat Guy" (@SweatyFatGuy) on "Why Today's Children Are Depressed" video.

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  2. I've had PTSD since I was 8 or 9 years old, somewhere around there. Beatings at home from my older brother and dad, kinda minimizes it, because my brother stabbed, poisoned, bludgeoned, pushed me down stairs, ran me over with farm equipment, and a few other things. Never knew when he would attack me. Then I enlisted at 19, way back in 1988. Went to war in 1990, again in 2004. Between that I got married, had kids, divorced, and had so many close calls with the reaper I cannot count them all. The military kicked me out on a medical after the injuries from my 04 deployment left me barely able to walk. Chronic pain, destroyed joints, not from enemy action. The VA said I have dysthymia, a chronic depression kinda like pulling a weighted sled around with you, or being under water while everyone else is above it, along with all the physical problems from my time in the military. At 40 years old in 2009 I was diagnosed with PTSD for the first time, and then it all made sense why I did the things I did. Rifles in every room avoiding crowds, sitting with my back to the wall, scanning and watching everything around me.. anger.. They tried meds, and that was worse. The side effects and the way it made my brain not function, living in a fog is my my thing. So I work out, stay busy building old cars, building my house, working in my yard on my land, big projects like that. Been making videos lately.. Its fun and challenging. Been divorced twice, neither time was because of my PTSD, I try to limit its effect on others. However they can affect me a lot. I found I do much better alone, keeping people away, because other people are the main source of stress in my life. Its not for everyone, some people need to feel wanted and close to others. I actively push people away, not out of fear or anything, life is simpler, easier, and if you want a job done right, do it yourself. The part that relates to you is this. Its called self talk. What we tell ourselves is our reality, if you dwell on the parts of life that depress you, then you will stay there. This is not to say you cannot have an imbalance, but you have a choice every day about how you are going to feel. I still have all the issues from my life, but how I choose to think about them has changed. The chronic pain lets me know I am still alive. Being alive is good because I can do things, go places, and enjoy my time here. I live in the woods so I am close to nature, and that is the big thing for me. I love all the trees and wild life around me. Its really dark here at night, one of the darkest places in the USA outside of Alaska, so I can see all the stars on clear nights like last night. Those stars remind me of two things. That everything that is a problem for me is temporary, and compared to the vastness of space they are small problems. The other thing is that we are all connected to those stars, we are made of the same stuff, so we are the universe, self aware so we can study ourselves and learn about everything there. I find that comforting and very cool. Tell yourself you're good today, and you will be even when the day goes to shit. Your perception and what you tell yourself matters. Its not easy, but eventually you will get used to it, and your brain will change the chemicals in it to fit how you decide to be. Just make sure you tell yourself the truth, no deluding yourself. :)
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