Comments by "Vasectomy Fail" (@vasectomyfail442) on "The Babylon Bee" channel.

  1. I was in line at Starbucks yesterday with my iPhone and MacBook in hand, hating capitalism as I often do, and the birthing person in front of me had a 3 month old offspring , it laughed at something and the barista smiled at it! Disgusting! That thing should’ve been aborted. Every child grows up to be a fascist. Luckily my parents are buying me my own Starbucks franchise. I hate them Oh and it’s gonna be a vegan Starbucks, because animals deserve to live… children don’t but farm animals do
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  2. i'm incredibly offended... not sure by what exactly but i'll get back to ya
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  3. Y’all got a house, and a biggun at that. Definitely privileged
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  4. I’ve been trying to catch it too, I’m just curious what it’s like to not have a sense of smell for a week. But no luck, I will continue to be sad , unvaxxed, and alone
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  5. You can also get plant based cheese and ice cream from this process
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  6. one can only hope the ending is accurate
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  7. “I just don’t like guns” -my mom Most convincing argument I have ever heard.
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  8. yuck
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  9. the best one i've ever seen is "VIRGINITY IS COOL, C'MON C'MON! VIRGINITY IS COOL!"
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  10. yeah, but MY OWN farm and t-shirt business will THRIVE after communism. because me and my friends (who are also 15 years old) truly understand change for our fellow human
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  11. Also any Little Golden Book. All the gold on earth should be reparations to our kings and queens
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  12. What about Hop on Pop? Pops and father figures have NO PLACE in a family. The birthing person should be earning all of zer money off welfare, which means the kids would be too busy eating Cheetos and playing video games to “hop on … yuck … pop” . Plus dr. Seuss was white, need I say more?
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  13. So inspiring! F the haters right in their butts
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  14. one of the characters on spongebob is a starfish, sorry but starfish are reeeeeecist
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  15. You could still have mouth sex, I believe it’s called
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  16. I’m 40 years old and last week I held an actual earwig in an imaginary courtroom and had him charged with criminal trespassing and he was executed by beheading. Would a woman do that ?
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  17. Aww lil fella’s just doing his best. I take back everything I said about Kommie’s speeches
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  18. i've been to the states. back in the 80s you could make jokes about groups of people there. now they got legal weed n stuff. you can go camping and go to amusement parks, make fun of the president, etc. pretty cool.
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  19. I once saw footage of hitler. … and I’ve seen footage of trump. I think we all see what’s going on here
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  20. what is that strange creature with the long hair and higher pitch voice? is that a tree or a type of beetle? i am beyond confused
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  21. This guy’s a jerk
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  22. I was at rite-aid yesterday and there was a poster out front with a woman urging you to get a vaccine, the model on the poster was wearing a mask and pointing to her injection site. The masks are all theater
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  23. If you drop half of your peanut butter n jelly sandwich, the peanut butter or jelly lands on the floor, ruining your sandwich and making a mess. Definitely just one set of footprints on that beach. Nice catch god!
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  24. There’s also counting on your hands, we all know they are counting how many races they can beat up and not just doing math or making a mental checklist. Cracking your knuckles is tell tale as well, they’re practicing cracking the spines of minorities
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