Comments by "buddermonger2000" (@buddermonger2000) on "Truth About Porn, Sex, Women, AI Girlfriends, Laziness u0026 Toxic Masculinity | Dr. K (Healthy Gamer)" video.

The thing about the low birth rates is misleading. The problem isn't people getting together, though people are lonely and without connection more than ever today, it's that those people who are together, refuse to have kids. They each have 1, maybe 2. Very few couples are having 3 kids. In many ways, if you look at the divorce rate (I think it's near 50%), I'm not sure many couples are together long enough to even have 3 kids. Though, generally, couples simply choose to not have 3 kids. Due to prescriptions about the world and their place in it. That's the cause of fertility rate decline. Every time.
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@Outstanding_Gal No, it's not. Everyone goes to that. That's never how it works. The poor have more kids, because the attitude is just "we make it work and this is right" "Not having the money to have kids" is a problem of worldview that is inherent to the fertility problem and why it's very correlated with religiosity and negatively correlated with wealth.
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@Outstanding_Gal It's not the truth. As i said, you make it work. Daycare is 100% a luxury. As are extracurriculars. You can scrap those immediately. Clothes can be bottom of the barrel and hand-me-downs. Bills that's fair, but realistically, it doesn't change too much from adding two kids from two adults. Rent doesn't change either. Rent doesn't change from adding two kids. Education is free in just about everywhere where these costs are concerns. The increase in expenses are food and medicine, and they don't even eat as much as children. That's most of it. The reason I can say that is because the poorer families have 2 and 3 kids. They have larger families. In comparison, it's the wealthy people who don't have kids, as i said. They're the ones who cap out at 1 most often. If you go to the ghetto they usually have 2 or 3 kids. If you go to the country, they usually have 2 or 3 kids. If you go to the suburbs, they still tend to have 2 kids, but you see more 1s and 2s than 2s and 3s. If you go into the wealthy city center, you see 1 kid, if any at all. Sometimes 2.
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@Outstanding_Gal I think if you prioritize having more first, the rest will fall into place. In the West, it's very difficult to have unhealthy children. It's very difficult to leave them uneducated. What's most difficult is to raise them with your values without specific effort put in, but that seems to be a fact that isn't affected by the amount of children you have. I don't need "super children" who are in every extracurricular and at the top of their class in everything. I think giving them just a loving environment will do a lot more.
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@Outstanding_Gal I'm sorry, that would be incorrect. I know it's not necessarily cheap, and I know what goes into it. It's a misconception on your part, however, on just how much it costs. You need to learn how to stretch budgets, and you give up a great many luxuries, however, it's nowhere near impossible. You make it work. Separately, you're again incorrect as to why it's difficult to find uneducated and unhealthy children in the West. The reason isn't because we focus our money and resources into that kid, but instead that it's all subsidized by our governments via our taxes. You do not have to provide that yourself. You are in a clean environment that has free education for everyone for at least 12 years of life. It's very difficult to be unhealthy in the West. It was not a result of focused effort. In fact, the story of America's founding, is having 7 children per generation who were all healthier and more educated than their European counterparts, and populating entire sections of a continent as a result. As an addendum, have you ever met people from those families? Me personally, when I have, I never found them wanting for much of anything.
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@Outstanding_Gal Unfortunately, you'd again be incorrect. If neglectful parenting was such a problem, you'd find those with worse mental health among the lower classes who have more kids and their parents working more often. However, that's not the case. You find it disproportionately, again, among the middle-high classes with MORE money, not less. The reason for the skyrocketing increase in mental health issues is for a combination of reasons. One of them, is in fact just the rise of the internet and loneliness. The social impacts of the internet are just now being fully felt, and we don't know how to deal with them. We don't know how to properly use the internet. For young women, they often have a ton of comparison and platforms where bullying never stops because it follows them on social media. Separately, we've actually done something very bad. We've been too hands on as parents for the last 10 or so years. What that has done is that, with those fewer kids and focusing off all of those resources, the children have been more and more sheltered until they were unable to actually develop properly their response mechanisms and now essentially have mental allergies. Their mental immune systems are intensely overactive, thus decreasing their overall health. Realistically, there are plenty of other things, but suffice to say that the modern world is best characterized by a combination of crude social experiments that we've no social adaptations for yet. So we get hit with the worst effects today, and that tanks all of our collective mental health. It also bears mentioning that just like high religiosity is correlated with more children, it's also correlated with better mental health.
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@Dimitris_Half What does it mean to be poor in your eyes?
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@Outstanding_Gal I don't think you are understanding me. The wealthy children are those with worse mental health, more generally. It's not about getting help, but instead that they're simply less well off mentally. Which is the crux of my point. They're worse off, despite better access.
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@Outstanding_Gal Good, we established a definition we can agree on. None of that comes about from having too many kids lol.
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@Outstanding_Gal The problem is not "if you're poor". That's not the main argument. No no no. You've confused correlation with causation. My argument is a very simple one: money is negatively correlated with children. That is not a casual relationship. However, in order for not having money to indeed a factor in NOT having children, they have to at least be correlated. Everything I've discussed is to point out a certain truth: that you make it work. My point in discussing not relying on things like daycare and similar is to point out that what you describe is an apprehension which is more linked to worldview than it is a reflection of reality. In truth, everything you've brought up doesn't affect the children that much except for your definition of poor. That definition of poor is one where you're basically at rock bottom. Though yes they too are more likely to have more children than the wealthy, it's why I've specifically mentioned "lower class" and similar. However, it's not very difficult to avoid that. You'll sacrifice a lot that's true. But what you'll sacrifice is more things like expensive vacations and new technology. Things that are more basic but not really limiting overall quality of life. It's also why I mentioned religion in both mental health and having more children. It's to push the idea that it is worldview, not economic woes.
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@Outstanding_Gal From the get-go I said it was expensive, but less than you'd think, IE: not enough to be a significant factor in the decision. I think a better question is: what is the best life for your kids? One of luxury, or one where they understand the costs and appreciate everything?
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@Outstanding_Gal The first part is completely doable in near any environment. But the best Healthcare and best education? What constitutes good healthcare? What constitutes good education? "The Best" especially is very difficult no matter what. Everything else you said, just like i said before you don't need to be wealthy at all to do accomplish, however.
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@Dimitris_Half When you start doing private school, piano, martial arts, etc, that is indeed expensive. They're wealthy people things and always have been.
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