Comments by "Sammy B" (@sammyb1651) on "How women DISRESPECT men without realizing it: understanding power" video.

This video is fundamentally wrong-headed anyway. Women breezily disrespect men all the time but it's not really what is at the heart of the matter. The problem of disrespect is downstream of a more significant issue and that is the horrendous mismatch in requirements between male and female partners. Women have a huge laundry list of reasons for getting into a relationship with a man. They view a man as an endless performer of tasks. Men have practically zero requirements of a female partner and seek a relationship mainly for intimacy. The solipsistic idea women have in their head of all the tasks a man should be performing/ways in which he should be "behaving" (essentially in support of her and her objectives) renders many of them unable to act respectfully. This is because-in many regards-the idea of his being sovereign and independent is completely in conflict with the myriad acts of service she wants him for in the first place. This is women's problem to resolve. It's not a man's fault. The 'respect' thing is dealing with the symptoms, not the cause.
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@Alexxx492 You miss the point. If you want a "high value man" its because your laundry list of the things you want him to do for you is effectively EVEN LONGER still.
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This video is fundamentally wrong-headed anyway. Women breezily disrespect men all the time but it's not really what is at the heart of the matter. The problem of disrespect is downstream of a more significant issue and that is the horrendous mismatch in requirements between male and female partners. Women have a huge laundry list of reasons for getting into a relationship with a man. They view a man as an endless performer of tasks. Men have practically zero requirements of a female partner and seek a relationship mainly for intimacy. The solipsistic idea women have in their head of all the tasks a man should be performing/ways in which he should be "behaving" (essentially in support of her and her objectives) makes them unable to act respectfully towards him because-in many regards-the idea of his being sovereign and independent is completely in conflict with what she wants him for in the first place. This is women's problem to resolve. It's not a man's fault. The 'respect' thing is dealing with the symptoms, not the cause, so Orion is wasting his time here.
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Thats a fair point but it's a bit of an unlikely example. The more common example we see is women requiring their partner to say when they'll be home from a night out/punishing them for being any later/checking on them (etc etc) while the same woman would absolutely laugh at the notion her man deserved to be appraised of her likely return home time. She's out with her friends and she can damn well do as she pleases. Thats the more direct equivalent and it exposes how women are happy to behave with appalling hypocrisy.
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@JS-mh1fh A man likes to feel appreciated for the work he does that is necessary to make the household function. What he doesn't want is to be taken for granted and put on and endless treadmill of labours that a woman feels are appropriate for him to do. Most of them are not. And I mean that either directly or by proxy (ie buying a load of crap that isn't worth having). Most of them are simply borne of the female's greed, vacuous consumerism or her desire to make her friends envious. This last one is extremely significant. Ultimately a man learns the things he is being tasked to do/buy don't really make her happy anyway (as she's already pointing to the next thing on the list). She is in a constant p!ssing contest with her friends for status and she has made the man's function to discharge whatever tasks allow her to compete on that totem pole. Most men know that a woman will do very few things for his express pleasure or even with any consideration or thought towards him at all. He can reconcile himself to this though (as he asks so little of her) provided his effort is deployed on things that are actually meaningful and beneficial to his family.
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And yet women typically have no problem doing so.
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Good stuff!
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@rhuiden4086 Agree. At the very heart of the matter is that women don't have very interesting internal lives (compared to men). You only have to look at the things they value and how easily they become bored. They're fundamentally consumers rather than producers. Because of this their instinct is to insert themselves at the centre of a relationship and make the relationship about them. Men are typically awarded the "job" of keeping the woman happy. Men need to resist this at all costs. They need to insist that a woman takes responsibility for her own happiness. Anything short of this is (essentially) akin to dating a child and more needs to be done to shame women for thinking this is ok. It isn't. Ps...women: If you're bored, it's because YOU'RE a boring person.
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Say fair enough and ask her what her thoughts are on signing a pre-up? Bear with me: Assuming you both want children (this is virtually always the case), you're both gaining equal benefit from a union. In other words, you're not getting some unearned benefit from her-she WANTS children so she isn't doing you some sort of one-sided service in having your children. It has to be fully understood and agreed upon that the getting of a family is the main objective/benefit of marriage and that that benefit is completely MUTUAL and equitable. Once that point is established, ask her if she'd be prepared to agree to a negative financial settlement on divorce if SHE ends the marriage, or in the event of her infidelity. This would be mirrored by a similar commitment on your end. I'm just talking about the principle here (not presenting her with a formal document), for the sake of a discussion/thought experiment. In the scenario above, her concern about you leaving the marriage and "robbing" her of her youth is addressed. You're committed to the union and you agree to a financial penalty if you renege on it in future. If she says "no", you can reasonably dismiss her arguments. Her concern isn't around the risk you'll leave her in future, her concern is actually that she'll lose her optionality of leaving you in a financially advantageous way. Nb she can argue all sorts of other things (possibility you'll become abusive etc etc) in an attempt to de-rail the discussion, but resist that and point out you're not presenting her with a binding document. It's a thought experiment and you're judging her responses to gauge where her true motivations lie.
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@Kellyfox98 You're not saying anything unreasonable there. I don't know a man who wouldn't agree with that as a fair settlement between the sexes. My point however-and I made it very plainly using an extremely common example-is that most women don't behave in that way. They behave utterly hypocritically.
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