Comments by "SK ONTHEROAD" (@skontheroad2666) on "Lifestyle Of A Hasidic Woman 🇺🇸" video.
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The part when he interjects needs some clarification... there are some Orthodox women who choose NOT to cover their hair at all, and only cover it in synagogue or other religious service (weddings, funerals). Halachically (by Jewish law), one may allow a "tefach" of their hair exposed. So there are many Orthodox Jews who wear just a fall instead of a full wig and they pull out some hair by the hairline and blend it in, so it looks incredibly natural. Within the Ultra-Orthodox community, each group is different and it is based on their culture within their culture (and yes, likely goes back to how the head Rabbi of that group has "poskined" (when a Rabbi gives an opinion know an issue that one has a question about. Chabad Lubovitch--the group he is interviewing--who are the most open and friendly, all wear very expensive, long (dare I say, sexy) wigs. They cost anywhere from $2,500 to $5,000 each and women will usually have at least an everyday wig and another one for shabbat and special occasions. We never change style or color from one day to the next. If you want to change your shade, then you would change all your wigs (and they don't grow back, so you better be sure....). Other groups wear a hat over a wig, just to be sure anyone who may think you are not covering your hair, sees you covering your hair. And they still wear pillbox hats (a hold over from the 60's). Whether you are in the community in Brooklyn or in Israel, they all have the same "look" again, there are many, many groups within Orthodoxy and within Ultra-Orthodoxy. Chabad is a great way to learn about Judaism, but when they bring you in, it is usually the Chabad way or the highway. Whereas another modern-Orthodox group, Aish HaTorah, also does outreach to Jews to bring them back to Orthodoxy. But once one is ready, they don't necessarily keep you within the fold (of Aish), but send you out to explore other Modern Orthodox communities.
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 @itawircberg6376 Yes, I already commented on a previous video (in which Malky says she is Chabad--not that I needed to hear her say it to know), why Chabad is the most open and friendly, as kiruv is their main mission. And that there are 1,000's of shluchim and Chabad houses all over the world, because back in the 1950's the Rebbe said "where there is a Jew, we will build a Chabad house." They may have started in the subway stopping people and asking "are you Jewish" and then trying to get people to lay tefillin or take home shabbos candles to light, but now they have the best online presence of all of the Orthodox groups, great marketing and PR dept's, and they have taken kiruv to a different level. No other Ultra-Orthodox group does that. And even if one is not Chabad, if you are traveling for work or vacation, and you need somewhere to daven or need to find food, Chabad is always there. Regardless if you are in Boston, Bangkok or Bali, you will find Chabad ready and willing to help!
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 @itawircberg6376 Also, I am not stereotyping, I am generalizing. I am very entrenched in the Lubovitch community, which is why it is easy for me to see that Malky is Lubovitch (which she then verified in one of his other videos). Every community has it's own flavor and style. This is a YT video and an overview of Hasidic women. Any overview will lead to generalizations and I think most people understand that. However, people still have questions. And many people who don't understand the culture don't realize that there are Modern Orthodox Jews in Flatbush, for example, whose everyday community life is closer to Chabad than Chabad is to, for example Satmar or Skver, over in Williamsburg or other parts of the City. Not to mention that going into detail about Satmar (which is the largest sect amongst Haredim), would not only be disrespectful to the Satmar, it is difficult to explain the Satmar to people who don't understand Orthodox Judaism (even FFB's), without having people cast aspersions on them. They get enough bad press. They don't need anymore, especially from within the fold. Especially not now.
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 @tg2683 Then you are aware of the changes and differences between Aish the org and Aish the shul and how some of the shuls have separated themselves from the org. Just as Rav Bekovitz, who took over as Rosh Yeshiva for the org in Israel, would likely not consider himself personally Modern Orthodox, he would consider Aish HaTorah, the movement, Modern Orthodox in general. The movement is still based on kiruv, and they know that, as an organization, Modern Orthodoxy seems less restrictive and more appealing to people. So as an organization, in the US, they still align themselves with Torah U'Maddah (as you know, it is very different in Israel. But Aish believes in the army, for example. They are still Zionists.) They have a very large presence in LA and after shabbos I asked two of the Aish Rabbis I am close to (one's a relative and one is a neighbor), if they align themselves with Modern Orthodoxy, and moreover, would Rav Weinberg, zt"l, say that Aish (the org) is aligned with Modern Orthodoxy. The answer was yes to both. But I asked about the org, not the shuls that have spun off or the Rosh Yeshiva as an individual. So, in conclusion, I guess one should confer with their Aish Rabbi in their community for further explanation and clarification. If one is asking, then, a. the person asking is likely not FFB, and if they are BT and want to understand the nuances of the differences, B. it is likely signaling to a larger conversation. But hey, that is what exploring Judaism is all about--asking questions!
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 @tg2683 LOL...I totally "hear you"... just this shabbos we were hanging out, talking Torah, and one of my kids starts a dvar Torah, but then does that thing where they cross into medrash (Lubovitch Medrash, that they learn in Gan Izzy or whatever)... and then it just blurs to them when little, but when they get older, they should be able to differentiate between medrash and Torah. My husband and I just looked at each other and rolled our eyes. Then corrected her. So I know what you mean by an insult to some. What I don't get is which other sect could she be?? (Insert Satmar joke here)?? And moshiachists are fairly rare these days (and I will limit my adjectives to that). I don't count those at all. Most of my friends are Gehze, so I have very little to do with the hippie, dippie Chabad crowd. Or Moshiachists, or any other fringe sub group. When my husband was in grad school our Rav was Chabad, we were in the middle of nowhere and the Rabbi could not leave for a Shabbat unless my husband would be there,, bc he was the only one who could daven for the amud and lein. 25 years later, we are still very close. But they taught each other so much in the beginning. Our first meal at his house my husband leans over and asks me "what's a Tanya? 24 years of Yeshiva education and I have never heard of a Tanya before?" Then at their Pidyon, when siblings were visiting, we were telling a story at the shabbos table and his brother asked "what are you guys, reformed?" Oy vey! Such an insult, I had to hold my husband down! But when stuck in an insular community like Brooklyn, that is your world. If you are not sent to Australia for a year, or on shluchus somewhere where there are other kinds of Jews, it is Chabad or nothing (and the rest of us are goyim...). So feeling insulted can work both ways. The Chabad community where we live now has started using the Modern Orthodox schools for a better education that will allow for college. My friends say that their kids are teaching them (the parents) how to become Modern Orthodox! They certainly didn't learn in Crown Heights!
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 @shulamitkalish3060 LOL, yes, I also laughed when my daughter said it. What's old becomes new again! Like sitting on the square on Ben Yehuda... She is Shana alef so you know how they label everyone. My son is Shana bet and he is "shtarking hard" (Israel was the cure for the Corona blues as YU was zoom only--very handy!) I am going to have to look for the video where Malky says she is Chabad (now it is bugging me)--someone else said she is Bobov! That was ridiculous. Can you imagine a Bobove woman in an animal print, a sexy Shevy's, who makes her own music videos and walks the streets of Brooklyn, alone with a random guy filming a YT video?? Not likely... and you are right, it is too hard to explain to outsiders. Brooklyn alone is its own world. The "Lubovitch Light" crowd in Brooklyn is still so different than in LA, for example. I have a whole theory on how and why things changed after the Rebbe, zt"l, was nifter, and then with the introduction of the internet (for another time). I am probably a lot older than you, but even within the NY communities, things have changed a lot over the years. "Modern" Monsey (which has grown so much over the past 30 years) is a very different modern than say, Teaneck or Woodmere. A friend who grew up Chassidish in Brooklyn met a Lubovitch boy, and he told her he was Chassidish... she went to meet his family in Crown Heights and as she had never really been exposed to Chabad, she ended up saying to him "You call yourself Chassidim? This is not Chassidish!" They are married with kids now, 25 yrs later. And she still makes fun of him. My other friend, as Upper Westside Modern as they come, married into a big (gehze) Lubovitch family and even tho YU straightened him out, as she says, he still "plays dress up" on shabbos. And she calls his gartel "his lingerie" (she is very funny). Chabad is as Chabad does... we are as misnogdish as they come and so my husband is a very typical, joyless Jew, as I call him. Whenever in Israel for Pesach, I used to drag him to Moshav Modi'in chol hamoed for their festival to visit old friends of mine. I love a good Carlebach davening. He never liked it. But that is also why I can appreciate Chabad (he can't). They do good for the world! And I travel a lot for work, so when I can't get home for shabbos, Chabad is always there! But they don't look like Bobove Chassidim...lol.. so I will look for the video! Kol tov! Stay healthy!!
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 @shulamitkalish3060 Yup! Very typical in our community. Most kids do a year in Israel after HS. And whereas I had always said "Shana Bet" were words that would never leave my lips, never say never! I brought him home in March the minute Trump said he was closing the borders (spent 5 hrs on hold with United, then booked tix and called and said you have 4 hrs to get to the airport). Then he spent 4 soul sucking months in his room zooming (and playing way too much Fortnite) and finally I said, enough! And sent him back. So did most parents. It was a good solution. He is done next week and then starting YU. He is in Bet Shemesh and she is in Yerushalayim. Complaining about the weather. They keep pretty close tabs on them, so they don't get out much. Boys schools are less strict. And it is way more strict than it was 30 years ago. Speaking of strict, yes, of course there are exceptions to every rule (can you imagine shaving your head?? I cannot.). But even if someone like your friend were to do a YT video, I would think she would still be respectful and considerate of others and not attempt to bring them into the video without asking them first, don't you think? Like the woman in the sheitl shop who asked not to be shown (even tho it is great advertising!). Malky also said she grew up frum (how frum, or if she grew up Chabad, she didn't elaborate on). So she would know that while she may be ok doing it herself, others would frown on it and would likely not agree to take part in it. I won't even go into Maaris Ayin, lol. You are right, we are getting worked up over shtuiot! BTW, I just heard about that poor woman in the forest, and some other stuff that happened. Baruch Dayan HaEmet. How awful! We never hear about it in the US, just on YT. Are things heating up over there or was it random, usual stuff (you know what I mean)?.
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 @shulamitkalish3060 Thank you! Shana Gimel!! Wow, talk about shtark!! She is already talking Shana bet (I shut that down pretty quickly), but she is already talking marriage too (never had a bf, lol!). Everyday is something else. If it weren't for Corona, I would be annoyed that she calls 5 times a day (and then she calls her sisters). A year away should be a ayear away! On the other hand,, my son barely answers texts. They are closing borders again now. I am getting very Covid weary... we have family in Elkana, and she hasn't been there for shabbos even once. But she did visit a cousin who lives 5 mins from her. Which has also been handy when she needs something. They meet at the gate, that is how strict it is. And we didn't get to visit this year either. I cannot stay home another Pesach!!! No way! I made Pesach last year and said first and only... I thought things were looking up, but now who knows. You are right, it is all in Hashem's hands, so I tend not to stress and leave it up to the Big Guy... what else can you do? Luckily, they are well traveled and independent so they have some street smarts which is helpful. You lived in Brooklyn, you know what I mean...I grew up in the city and my husband is also East Coast. It just freaks me out that my kids are Californians.... camp on the East Coast helped sort them out tho. It is still the center of the Orthodox world!
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 @tg2683 LOL!! We are about as misnogdish as they come... Yet I still have a room in my heart for a good Carlebach minyan (because I knew Shlomo years ago--yes, I am old) but my husband is (as I say) a joyless Jew. So when he was at grad school and we lived in "yehuppitz" (as Chabad says), all there was was Chabad (now, 25 yrs later, they are still amongst our closest friends). But the first shabbosom we spent together, "the Rabbi", Shlomie, who grew up (gehze) in Brooklyn, would ask us about our background, our schooling, etc. Bc even tho he was also from NY, he grew up Brooklyn sheltered and knew nothing about Modern Orthodoxy (but he learned, thru us). One meal, he started a dvar Torah and referenced the Tanya. My husband, who only knew Chabad from the subway, 30 yrs ago, when they used to give out candles and try to stop you to lay tefillin (before the invention of the internet), leaned over and said to me "What's a Tanya?? 19 years in Yeshiva and I have never heard of a Tanya before??!" Fast forward a few years (and many funny barbs and stories between the two of them)--and bear in mind that Shlomie could not leave town on Shabbat unless he knew we were in town bc my husband was the only person within a few hundred miles who could daven for the amud and lein... they made a bris and my in-laws happened to be in town so we had shabbat lunch by them. In the middle of the conversation, his brother who was visiting from Brooklyn (and saw us in shul already!), was listening to our convo, as I sat on the shul board and was discussing fundraising thru membership (a foreign concept in Chabad). The brother says "Nu, what are you? Reformed?" I shoot my husband a look before he tries to jump across the table at him...a few minutes later, he gives a dvar Torah that was 100% (Lubovitch) medrash. Finally, my MIL cocks her head to one side and ask them both, "Are we in the same religion??" Your story made me think of that, lol! I totally hear you. Chabad has changed a lot over the years. Since the Rebbe, zt"l, was nifter, and then add the invention of the internet. A lot has changed. BUT....I travel a lot for work, and Chabad is always there for me. As I am not BT, I can take the good and leave the bad. Unfortunately, others can't (and when Chabad "gets you" they keep you!). The Lubovitch Light crowd, especially outside of Brooklyn, is altering the landscape--the kids are attending Modern Orthodox yeshivas bc they want to go to college and then work (their parents say the kids are teaching them how to be Modern Orthodox). I used to get upset that they didn't revamp their own schools (they all want financial aid), but after 10 years, I am cool with it. They give back. In a way, they understand Chassidus better than anyone else! Or we can hope atleast! And yes, living in Israel is a whole different ballgame (I have 2 kids there). Not so much intermingling. But once you all get to Israel, you need eachother less. That is the upside!! Kol tov!! Stay healthy!! I need to go answer someone who thinks Malky is Bobov (she said she was Chabad in a video--I have to find where), and also thinks I am new to Judaism and do not understand the different hashkafot....🤔🙄 I need to take a breath before I answer her, lol!
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 @michellelansky4490 The Aish info is not mine, it is from two of the Aish Rebbeim whom I asked. Again, I was not asking them what they would label themselves (as they are yeshivish, which is appropriate), but what they would tell someone Aish is. As far as "most of Lakewood being Harvard Law students", that is a stretch. At best. And as far as who opposes medical school, well, one has to go to college first. In the Chassidish world, those who are FFB and want to take courses to even allow them to get into college are already fringe. Most yeshivish kollels, or high schools, are not WASC accredited (or any of the other seven titles IV accreditations across the country). Chassidish aligned students are few and far between at YU as it is. And always was. Those who grew up in the depths of sheltered Brooklyn yet changed course and went to YU (such a rebel!) are few and far between, and fairly well known as "the success story" certainly going back at least the 30 years that I can account for of YU grads. Yes, there are some. But they need to working towards it starting at 16 if they don't want to fall behind, and depending on what community one lives in, that can be an onerous (and expensive) task. If one wants to get into a top Yeshiva HS in the US, such as Frisch, Ramaz, DRS, YULA, they need to be at the top of their class in grade school. And after HS, they need to spend atleast Shana alef at a top Yeshiva (or "sem" as people started calling it 20 years ago). Girls can go to Harvard Law too (like my sister in law did)! Unfortunately, one does not wake up one day and say "I want my kid to be a doctor, what do I do?" And suddenly switch paths. It is not that easy for those who grew up frum. For those who are older, and then found Yiddishkeit (likely thanks to Chabad), it is easier to incorporate into your life. And I won't even go into the back story of the Lakewood yeshiva boys who may have been Harvard Boys, as it would just lead to lashon hora. But they all have a story. It is not the norm.
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 @michellelansky4490 I am sure I am older than you, so as far as bringing Jews back to Yiddishkeit and the history behind it that started in the 80's with Rabbi Riskin's famous shabbos drash about "if you are going to sleep over at HER house, at least bring your tefillin with you"... a well known drash he gave on shabbos during the AIDS epidemic. In concert, Chabad was still among up their Kiruv movement, albeit candles in the subway, or guys trying to lay tefillin...but together they created a movement (you can look it up. There are many interesting stories and books about it). It was a period in time, after EST, the start of Scientology and people seeking out gurus to find the meaning of life, when shuls and organizations from "wink and stare" on the UWS to Shlomo, to Chabad in CH, all worked their hardest to bring Jews back to Judaism. The rebirth of the Ba'al Tshuvah movement. And they achieved a lot! Sadly, Shlomo, zt"l, and the Rebbe, zt"l, were nifter in the 90's and things faltered for a while. Then the internet was invented and it changed the world. Including the Orthodox Jewish world. From Modern Orthodox to Hassidim. Fast forward to now as those who got married back then have kids who are getting married. But without the Rebbe, and people who remember him (or even kids on the Moshav who didn't even grow up with him), there is a whole generation trying to grow, and fit in, and make a living, without a Rebbe for guidance. So, Chabad kids, "Lubovitch Light", who are not gehze, and can't get a good shluchus spot (or don't want to be in shluchus), are stuck. So what do they do? They infiltrate the modern Orthodox yeshivot. It was a problem 10 years ago as they all wanted financial aid. But, as the parents have said "the kids are teaching us how to be Modern Orthodox", and the parents are, in fact, giving back. Granted, you wouldn't see it happen in Misnogdish or Litvish circles, but Chabad is as Chabad does. And they possibly understand Chassidus better than anyone, so the ner tamid still shines thru and guides them. Or they just want their kids to succeed in life. Either way, we will take them.
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 @michellelansky4490 I don't know your background or where you are from. Nor would I be so presumptuous as to ask or guess. However, (as if I have nothing else to do), I will find the video in which she says she is Lubovitch. As I have a lot of Lubovitch friends, perhaps it is clearer to me, and that is why I saw it right away. But even if she were a Bobov outlier, she said she grew up frum. So while she may be outside the box, it is extremely unlikely that a Bobove woman, who records her own music videos, would wander around Brooklyn in an animal print, with a long, luscious top of the line Shevy's, walking alongside a random (sorry) shaygetz, through her neighborhood where she knows she will likely encounter people she knows and then spontaneously approach them to be on the video for YT with them, without contacting them and asking them first. She grew up frum and knows better than to put someone else in that predicament. You would never see that happen on the street with someone who grew up Bobov. Regardless how "open" they are.
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 @shulamitkalish3060 Thank you! You are right, I think her anxiety is real right now. And they are stuck in the dorm together was more than they would (and should) be, so it is leading to a lot of drama. She has a crazy roommate and she (and the other girls) have had so many issues with this girl since day one. My daughter always likes to handle things herself, so I let her. And bc I have always sat on the EB of all their schools, and the shul, she knows that I can reach out and help, but I have also always told them that we don't ask for special favors, or throw our weight around. We follow the rules and get in line and wait our turn. But, she also has learned that the one who yells the loudest gets the most attention. So, finally, yesterday, she called in tears and said "Mommy, you are right. You need to call the school." So for the first time since she has been there, I called the school (and showed them who can yell the loudest). What has been going on is totally crazy, and they need to move her room (which she has been asking to do since October). And, after one 10 minute phone call, it was sorted. So hopefully she will feel better about being there and atleast that stressful situation will hopefully be behind her. We shall see... as you say, when you are 18, you are supposed to be happy, having fun, and dreaming about your future. And her thoughts and "goals" certainly do change daily, lol!
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 @shulamitkalish3060 LOL, of course I am familiar with heimish (and all the other dozens of labels), however, I don't like to make assumptions about strangers on YT, even when they are pretty clear based on what they are saying, especially if they are BT. Because in my world, there are certain labels that we make fun of, which of course, is not very nice. So I don't want to insult anyone, even if they are a stranger and being offensive to me (and plenty of people make fun of our crowd too). But while Brooklyn has a huge Jewish community, with so many different types of religious groups, it is still very insular and many who grew up there can be very sheltered. Then you have the whole BT crowd who became religious via one of the Brooklyn groups, so they only know what they know (apart from exposure to Lakewood, Monsey, bungalow colonies, the correlating communities in Israel, etc). It is such a huge learning curve for someone just within their little world within the world, and one is constantly learning just as the communities are constantly changing. My comment about "where do they daven" wasn't literal, as there are tons of options all over each neighborhood. A shtiebel minyan may be the obvious answer (tho typically one would likely say "I daven by Rabbi so and so"), but generally when in grows up in say, a YI or 770, and then possibly changes course and ends up at say, Aish, it says something about who that person is and who they identify with. Does that make sense? Very similar to when someone makes Aliyah and chooses which community they are going to live in. Sure, there are always exceptions to every rule, but if someone moves to Chashmonaim, or Efrat, it signals to what label they identify themselves with. And as much as things evolve and change, I don't think Modern Orthodoxy is going away anytime soon. Am I making sense?
Someone just tested positive at her Sem. Now they are all going back into quarantine for 2 weeks....oy vey! More tears...
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 @shulamitkalish3060 BTW, about Flatbush. Remember when it used to be 30% "SY" and 70% "Jdub"? The school I am talking about (I am joking when I use those old references btw). And now the Syrians have basically taken over Flatbush and they make up 70-80%? The Syrian community has also gotten much more frum over the years, which has changed Flatbush so much in the past 30 years. And which each neighborhood changing and growing, they spill over into neighboring neighborhoods, which in turn changes that neighborhood. Brooklyn used to be much more straightforward as to which groups lived where. But just as there are always breakaway shuls, there are breakaway schools, and that, ultimately is usually one of the main driving forces of change in frum neighborhoods. I am sure you have heard about the tuition crisis in America. I have been working on a National committee for over 10 years trying to find a solution (not to be negative, but there isn't one...🙄--aliyah is the smartest move, as you know!), and the studies of the community schools and their breakaways really highlight the growth and changes in the larger Jewish communities both within the Tri-State area and beyond (Florida, LA). With each generation what people want for their kids education seems to grow as parents want more balanced and accredited schools (which is a good thing, in my opinion). It would be fascinating if it weren't so depressing!
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 @shulamitkalish3060 Ignorant is definitely not the word I would use, don't be silly! First of all you are way younger than I am, and while you said you had lived in Brooklyn, I was guessing that was during your early 20's, but, you could have possibly gone to Flatbush...(again, I don't like to be presumptuous as it can be offensive to people). But you are too nice to have grown up a NYer, lol... another clue! But even if you did, the expressions "Jdubs" (what "SY's" used to call Ashkenazim) would have predated you regardless. It doesn't have the nicest connotation anymore, depending who is saying it and how, but you can google it and read the (infamous) articles that were written about the Flatbush (and Deal) communities (they are funny actually, as long as one doesn't take offense). Back in the day, when my cousins went to Flatbush, it was a very different world. Nowadays, Flatbush can barely get a spot at Sarachek, they have dropped out so much from the mainstream Modern Orthodox scene. The a
Syrians made a spin off Yeshiva HS, Magen David (say it with the right accent, lol!), and they did play well at Sarachek the past few years, so maybe that is why Flatbush's team is so bad. They took all the good players. Who knows? But anyway, just as those expressions are old and therefore unfamiliar to you, and have been replaced by new ones, is the example I am making about how things change with each generation. And if one is BT and is only learning about the current, new stuff (and possibly occasionally the just recently passé expressions and ideology), they don't really understand the bigger picture and cultural history and background of Orthodox Jewish culture and how we got to where we are today. If that makes sense. I am a history and sociology geek, so I find these things interesting in general (Jewish or otherwise). Things don't just evolve and change on their own. Outside forces affect change. Even within Judaism, Orthodox or otherwise. Such as post WW2, how did Judaism evolve in the US and what forces of change affected the outcome. I find that fascinating. If you can ever find the book called "How to run a traditional Jewish Household" written by Blu Greenberg, you would find it a fascinating read! Even when it was new it was great! But it is so "out of date" now as so many years have passed and "rules" have changed. Maybe you can get an online copy--you would really enjoy it (sadly, her son, who she writes about a lot in the book, was a great friend and passed erev YK, years ago. Tragic.). But Blu and Rabbi Greenberg were the Rabbi and Rebbetzin in Riverdale in the 80's (and were friends with my in-laws, who started out in the Bronx and then moved to NJ where they started what is now a huge, well known community). I don't want to give details bc it will become political (which likely tells you what and where I am talking about...). Now I am just rambling, lol. OH! I had something else to ask your opinion on! Will send another message shortly. Thanks!!
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 @shulamitkalish3060 Oh, to be young again! Again, I am much older than you, so if one goes back to the late 80's when Rabbi Riskin made his famous speech at "wink and stare" (AKA Lincoln Square--where I grew up). Way before he moved to Efrat), and told everyone (from the Bima!), if you are going to sleep over at your girlfriends house, at least bring your tefillin with you! That was a huge moment. It was after the AIDS outbreak of the early 80's, when so many people were coming back to Judaism, many organizations (and even individuals such as Esther Jungreis), made a huge impact on so many people and Jewish communities. And just as any new community has to build a mikveh first, the reason that the school is so important is because it is the center of the community--it helps shape, define and drive the community. Hence the concept of "the community school". A concept now somewhat forgotten, unfortunately. But much like the joke about the person stranded on the desert island who shows his rescuers around...one Jew, 2 opinions, or 2 shuls..."what is that building? OH, that is "the other shul"--I wouldn't be caught dead davening there! (The punchline to the joke). Flatbush has always been one of the prototypes for how a community and community school can be "taken over" and redefined by changing forces and growth (in this instance, the growth of the Syrian community and how the next generations started to become more frum). It is inevitable. It is when the growth is not harmonious that we start to see divisions and problems. Which has made finding a solution to the tuition crisis in America next to impossible. It is truly tragic.
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 @shulamitkalish3060 Also, if I wrote anything offense, I apologize. They are actually not just my views. And while I sit on many boards, and these are the general, current, Modern Orthodox views in America right now, I certainly understand that there are many who may disagree. I am still pondering how to reply to Michelle who said that Modern Orthodoxy died with Rav Soloveitchik, zt"l, and that YU should strip the word Yeshiva from its name. I obviously feel strongly that YU is a necessary institution in America, especially with what goes on on college campuses right now. It is really awful right now in the US. Thank goodness for org's like standwithus.org! Kids should be allowed to attend whatever university they want, and not be harassed for being Jewish, or for their beliefs in general. It is times like these that I consider aliyah! (Briefly..😉. You are stronger and better than I am!)
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 @michellelansky4490 I am hardly painting anything with one brush--there just is not enough room, or time, to go through each label, segment, and sub segment of each group who identifies with Orthodox Judaism (from Conservadox to Ultra-Orthodox and everything in between). I am trying to address each of your comments and ideas one by one, however, while I really do not want to give a stranger mussar in a public forum, I will however point out that while you are entitled to your own opinions, please do remember that this IS a public forum, and some of what appears to be your own opinions, are in fact, yours alone. A public cry to shut down YU is, again, YOUR opinion. There are hundreds and hundreds of people who would disagree with you. Just as your statement about modern Orthodoxy being dead is very controversial. And if it were dead, then what would become of all the yeshivot and seminaries in Israel that are all still well attended (and needed)? And have been for decades? They are a now under the umbrella of MASA and YU (as they should be) and still represent the foundation of modern orthodoxy. Here, and in Israel.. Your definition of Halacha is exactly that. Yours. EVERYONE picks and chooses. No one is perfect. Just as you have decided to pick and choose which Loshon Hora halachot are important to you. And please bear in mind that I am only illustrating a point, however some of your statements are a slap in the face to halacha itself. The "issues" you have with YU are not the issues that YU sees as a "challenge", whether they offend you personally, or not. If you were a graduate of Stern, or affiliated in some way, you would have a better understanding of what YU is, what it's history is, what it stands for, and why so many are proud and thankful that it exists. Calling for the word "Yeshiva" to be stripped from it's name, and stating that one should not "mix this Judaism stuff in" is beyond a shande. It is the stuff that the Neturei Karta is made of!
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 @shulamitkalish3060 I don't have Instagram, but will ask my kids to look it up. I don't know if you saw it but I posted a comment saying exactly that. That Jews often get caught up in playing "who is the most frum card". It happens everywhere, in every community. And I just replied to the comment about how YU should stop associating all the "Judaism stuff" with it's name, and remove Yeshiva from it's title. That was only part of the person's post, but to claim the YU/Stern is not "Jewish enough" and doesn't observe halacha, and then point out specifically why, in that person's opinion, in a public forum, is not ok. The comment itself just devolved into negative PR for YU (or otherwise known as Loshon Hora!). I have worked too hard (and still work too hard), for Jewish education in America to stay on the right path and be accessible and available to anyone who wants it! I hear you and understand your perspective, but as you did benefit from a Stern education, even tho you are amongst the lucky ones who made aliyah, there are still so many here in the US who want a Jewish education from grade school through college. And then beyond if they want it. And I will continue to fight for that. Thank g-d for people like LH, who have made it their goal, personally and financially, to pull YU out of the Madoff hole we fell into, and get us back on track! Hopefully this Covid era will not set us back too far. And while there are still plenty of other (unaccredited) Jewish schools doing ok, if there are kids who want to cross over into the world of those college bound, there are plenty of us here to help them. Financially and otherwise. I am passionate about it as I know a lot of people who grew up at a Chofetz Chain or Bais Chaya Mushke, but clawed their way into college and beyond and any kid should be allowed that opportunity. Those who find out too late that it is so difficult really struggle and it is really hard to watch. Especially when they have a large family to support. Until there are no kids asking for help left, I will continue to fight in their behalf and make sure that YU and Stern will always be there to help them!
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 @shulamitkalish3060 I certainly did not mean to say anything negative about Ricky! In fact, again, if she is single, I have the perfect shidduch for her!! But I am very protective of YU and all it stands for (and as an old friend and huge admirer of Richard Joel, I have nothing negative to say about his tenure). Yes, YU went thru changes, as you mentioned, but anything with a label will go through changes. Including YU, as you know from being there at that time. Yet, I don't like to air "dirty laundry" in a public forum, especially when people don't understand the nuances. And as I mentioned about 6 degrees... I am not asking you to post details, but we are one step away from a list of (atleast) 10 common friends, lol! Jewish geography! But again, as evolution happens, whatever YU went through while you were there, was then overshadowed by the Madoff scandal, and that took precedence. We are still feeling the ripple affects. And trying to overcome it so that thos who want to have a secure, Jewish Orthodox college experience, will be able to. Labels, in general, are dangerous and are not a healthy thing. Some people need them more than others. And while their definitions are fluid and constantly changing, many don't feel the need to be defined by them. Nor should they. That is what leads to one group feeling superior over another.
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 @mikeherschhersch82 Yes, it truly is an oxymoron. And the wig culture, especially in Modern Orthodox circles, is definitely a mystery that no one would be able to give you a rational answer as to how it has become ok to wear such sexy locks (that are almost always nicer than the real thing). Certainly if you are going to spend $3-$5K on a wig, you want it to look as good as possible. And tzniut, while there are of course, rules, is still largely a concept. Shoes for example. One would not normally think if shoes as "too sexy", however I have friends who won't wear certain shoes because they are not tznius (maybe their husband has a foot fetish?) Other, more strict sects, have their own standards as to what a wig should look like, or whether one should wear a hat as well. But if you look back over the decades, the style of hat has not changed (still 1960's), the haircut is out of style and the wig itself is of a lesser quality (and less expensive), so all of those things together make all the women look the same--dowdy, not fashionable and not attractive. But they wear it with pride because it also signals to "I am more religious than you" (another neighboring sect in Brooklyn for example), which is very common. Everyone is always trying to outdo the person next door in the "who is the most religious" contest. In some Chabad circles, it is who has the hippest, best quality, best looking wig. Whereas in Satmar, they have a different look and a different standard. It is confusing and complicated. And has changed a lot over the years.
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