Comments by "Widdekuu91" (@Widdekuu91) on "2022 was rough // leaving Russia u0026 mental health" video.
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Allow me to mention some things that help.
- This will change and not stay this way
- Most people are decent. They've done studies. You just remember the 'mean/evil' ones better. But most people are proper decent folk that have good intentions.
- Sometimes you get a warm hug from someone on the couch and you realise that all the worries don't matter that much. Those moments will be there! At some point in life, it might be every evening.
- There are so many great things you will get to do in life, get to see and get to explore. Stories to tell people, that will be amazed and admire you. There will be moments in life in which you will dance and scream and laugh and think you're going insane with happiness.
- Your art, music or written word (or otherwise) can greatly influence other people. People don't always mention how grateful they are for small gifts or kind words, but you will find, later in life, that people remember them. I felt I had quite a sheltered life with hardly any friends, but a shopowner that I visited often, handed me an envelope when she retired. It had a handmade card with drawings and flowers and a long story about everything we'd talked about, what she remembered about me and that it always made her day a good day, whenever I visited the shop and talked about my life to her.
- There is a lot of loudness and nastyness in this world and it will pass. The important things last. People we love, live on in stories, memories and in symbolism.
- Kind souls and disarming humans are important, strong and need to love themselves more.
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Also, I want to tell another story.
Back in the day, I joined a parade, that has existed for more than a hundred years, so it's a highlight each year. Adults that have lived in these cities for their whole life, will bring their kids and stand at the side, waving and singing. It's a parade where people walk around incognito, you can see their eyes, but you can't see who they are. I joined the parade in costume and made some kids very happy with candy and dancing.
A bit later, I came past some older people, in their 80's. I spoke to them, shook their hand and told them that they must be cold. They agreed and said it was time for them to go inside again. I complimented them on their scarfs and moved on.
Then, some people around the age of 50 stood around, looking a bit grumpily and cold. They frowned and seemed to want to enjoy the parade, but didn't know how to, without feeling embarrassed. It was, they thought meant for the kids, not for them. But the kids were enjoying themselves plenty, speaking to adults doesn't hinder their excitement about the music and costumes.
So I stepped forward and leaned into a man's personal space, saying; 'Hello there sir! Are you enjoying yourself today?'
The man looked a bit startled at first, but once he realised I had no bad intentions to mock him, he grinned and said; 'Yes! But it's very cold!'
I answered; 'Yes, I know! I think so too. Thank you for coming to see us, in this cold.."
His eyes started shimmering a bit and he said; 'Thank you for being here!' I grinned and said; 'The pleasure is on our side, sir, we wouldn't have want to miss this for the world!'
I then handed the kids some candy and gave the man some too. I can't quite explain, but he seemed to have turned 20 years younger without the frown and his eyes were still glistening.
He's seen the costumes as a kid, too, ofcourse, he was reliving his nostalgic moments.
I walked on, and had the same experience with several other, grumpily looking adults. The moment you look them in the eye (even incognito) or put a hand on their shoulder and wholeheartedly (and honestly) tell them that you're happy that they are there, their eyes start shimmering and you can see their soul right in there.
I don't know how to explain it properly, apart from the shimmering lights that appear right before. But you can actually see "them" in there, as if you are looking at a house, where suddenly a child or person peeks around a door and waves.
It's for a short moment and the door closes quite quickly again afterwards, to protect themselves from harm. But it's a honour to meet people, especially strangers that will open the doors in their eyes for you and wave in the doorway. Sometimes you meet someone like that and it feels like a great honour and a very special moment.
Now, Roman showed a video, a while ago, of NewYearsEve with pro-Z content in it. He commented on how the celebrities look dead behind the eyes or had a void behind them.
To me, it looked empty as well, like a disappointed child hiding behind metal walls, from miles away.
Roman still has lights in his eyes, but the door is very much closed, understandably. He needs to remember that there is someone behind that door though and let him out once in a while, when he has the chance. Even if it's just during a rainy Sunday, by dancing around in his house or doing things he enjoys.
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Goals for 2023 are fine, just make sure that many of them are also just for fun.
Otherwise you're destroying the last bit of enjoyment that you have.
Plan fun things after workouts, even if you did not meet your expectations.
And allow yourself to go (positively) crazy every once in a while.
I like to dance around on silly music, like I'm a mad(wo)man. Sometimes songs like "Aphrodite's Child- The Four Horsemen' and sometimes the tune to "Eigen Huis en Tuin" (Dutch show) and then I'll act like I'm a deranged gopher and hop through the room.
And I like art, so I try to plan artmaking into the mix.
Make yourself some Christmas-decorations with friends (even silly ones) by printing out pictures and simply glueing them to a ribbon.
Write wellwishes on notes and hang them in a plant or in a jar or..I don't know, get some creative materials and decorate your toiletdoor.
Leave random friendly notes in the bus, or put cards with 'happy easter stranger!' in popular books in the library.
Bake your favorite cake or pie or bread and put foodcolouring in it, to make it look ridiculous. Make it 'marbled' with the foorcolouring in layers.
You can paint on the wall if that's permitted and tie-dye an old shirt. You're part of the solution to the war ending, but you're not "the only" part, so know when you've done enough and rest after that!
p.s. I think you can find it on Youtube, but there's a Dutch sketchshow that was ridiculing Putin a few years before. It's called Koefnoen - Cooking with Putin. Maybe it'll cheer you up.
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