Comments by "gnarth d\x27arkanen" (@gnarthdarkanen7464) on "How To Stop Being A People Pleaser" video.

  1. It's worth pointing out that at some level we ALL bear our masks to the general public. It would be silly and unsurvivable to do otherwise. However, while our physical growth "tops out" in our twenties or thirties, our mental and emotional growth continues throughout our lives. Every experience shapes and molds that growth in fairly predictable fashions. Through failures, shortcomings, and stumbling, we learn the things that do NOT work well. We begin to be able to predict things that won't end well. Through our successes, goals, accomplishments, and recoveries, we build our confidence and learn the things that DO work well. We shape our earlier misconceptions into newer and better, often more nuanced, prescriptions for making those adjustments to help things that probably won't end well, go not quite so badly, and for turning as many more into things that WILL go well. That NEVER EVER stops happening, until the day and very last syllable of breath escapes as we die. What Charlie teaches us, isn't a prescription for a new person. It's not even a method for recreating the persons we are. It's a directive for SHAPING the means of our growth in that intangible mental and emotional fashion. Finding these insights about psychology, charisma, meditation, self-control, and self-awareness is just a part of the litany of things we will use to shape our continued growth, by listing the possible solutions to such problems. They're not the only solutions, just the best ones Charlie and Ben can come up with "just now"... AND among the litany of others out there, in various forms, we add to our CHOICES of ways to handle life's many different faults, obstacles, and problems as we continue to shamble forward learning as we go. SO I'd have to posit, "No". It's not exactly a mask, nor a charade. It's not fake, though the first attempts at action often have a modicum of fakery to them... That old "fake it until you make it" methodology coming to usefulness at least from time to time. Rather, we EVOLVE anyway... AND these videos, philosophical or psychological as such, help us to pay attention and at opportunity to take control of the SHAPING of that EVOLUTION as we're experiencing it anyway. ;o)
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  2. Sorry to burst this bubble, but actually, you are INCORRECT about that.  Most of the time, due to hierarchy, a person tends to be agreeable to a boss's demands. BUT there are rarer instances when the boss is demanding something simply TOO ridiculous, obviously abusive of office... OR worse, as in my own case a couple of times, outright ILLEGAL... In which case, I heartily recommend not only a stern, "No, sir." but even the freedom to respond flat-out, "Go fuck yourself, sir." ...or even worse depending upon just how egregious the demand. The fact is, regardless of social climes or conditioning, we live in a society based on LAWS and RESPECT. The so-called "caving in" to demands over monetary gains absolutely must be weighed against the structure of that society and we individually must support it. This comes at a constant cost of personal responsibility. Regardless of a command or requirement, it is still the person receiving that command or requirement who must "pull the trigger" and commit to the deed itself. Otherwise, the courts asking "Why did you commit murder?" really CAN be answered with "I was just doing my job." OR perhaps, "Why did you commit MASS murder?" can be answered the same... ;o)
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