Comments by "gnarth d\x27arkanen" (@gnarthdarkanen7464) on "How To Be Charismatic If You're "Nerdy"" video.

  1. It's worth pointing out that there's a difference between being a bit nerdy... or liking something stereotypically nerdy... and setting yourself up to be a life-long social reject... It's okay to have a hobby like TTRPG's (like D&D) but you should probably have more than JUST D&D that's "cool" to you... or fun to do. Nothing wrong with video games, and I've played just about all the "dangerous" games through the 90's and into the early 2000's... BUT you should also probably be capable of having a reasonable discussion about more than games or comics or whatever else you might be intensely tempted to "geek out" about. Obviously, the 30-something shut-in who hasn't showered in a week or combed his hair in a month isn't going to win any popularity contests... When you've passed the intensity from fandom to full on addiction, it's a problem, and you should address it as such. AND if it's not a "problem", then you have nothing to be ashamed of or embarrassed about. ;o)
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  2. "Everybody seems normal until you get to know them better." Not sure where it originated, but I rather enjoy blaming Mark Twain for it... Doesn't make it any less true. ;o)
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  3. People tend to be attracted (in the generic sense) to like minded people... This is part of why a diverse variety of interests and even personal tastes can make you more relatable than having a strong knowledge or interest in a very narrow selection of interests or skills. Perhaps the top tip is to just be comfortable with the fact that not everyone is going to like you or be attracted to you. It's okay. You're just as valid as the people who would be your polar opposite are. If you get out and meet enough people there are going to be some who simply don't care for your company... ...AND that's okay, too. Here's the question you should ask yourself BEFORE you hide interests or hobbies or skills. "Do I really want to attract people into my life and my circle of friends when they're likely to hate everything I like???" I'd much rather have a few truly good friends than a massive following who believe I don't ride motorcycles just to ride motorcycles, or that I don't play D&D or GURPS or literally dozens of other TTRPG's, or who can't stand me carving leather or blacksmithing... or welding... or any of dozens of other things I find personally fulfilling and fun or satisfying to do or collect, or trade around with fellow "traders". I'd go so far as to admit that I'd just rather be honest and have NO friends at all, than hide myself away and worry that I might still get found out or "outed" by someone who knows me... like family knows me. AND being authentic is a major key to being confident. It doesn't matter how much you're willing to change to satisfy others for friendship, either. If anything, that is self defeating. Yeah, I'm a guy who likes cats more than I like dogs... so what? It doesn't mean I hate dogs, or even that there's a sense of dislike or lack of fun for having a pet dog. My cat, Harley, was rifle-broke... He'd point and retrieve, too... BUT only if it wasn't still kicking or he'd come back and sit on my foot until I'd shot it again... which the fam' thought was hilarious. Only downside was the limit to what a 10 pound cat could carry... so there's that. TL:DR? Be honest... You'll attract like minded people with just a little relatability and even decent grooming and communication skills. Chances are it'll be less stressful as soon as you stop hiding who your really are, in part or total. ;o)
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  4.  @zalamael  Well, it's not like a 10 pound white long-haired cat with a missing tail could retrieve even a wild turkey... It would've been mean for me to even try... BUT squirrels and the occasional duck or quail wasn't out of the question... Anyway, thanks... glad you got a chuckle. Even that it's true the humor was why I shared it... and the rarity of a cat being "rifle broke"... As clunky and rambly as I can get on a "non-sleeping" night, I still try to pepper in something fun, just to reward those who do bother to read... It's not ALL meant to be "brass tacks"... ya'' know? ;o)
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  5.  @zalamael  Yeah, we should. ;o)
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  6.  @zalamael  Well, I'm certainly more inclined to share a beer with you than throw a stein at your head for walking into the Pub... (lolz) Yeah, you're probably right. ;o)
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