Youtube activity of "Average Alien" (@AverageAlien) on "The Onion" channel.
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"Al Qaeda Also Fed Up With Ground Zero Construction Delays"
"Animator Misses The Birth Of His Child So Mr. Incredible Could Have Consistently Sized Penis Bulge"
"Apple Introduces Revolutionary New Laptop With No Keyboard"
"Back Of Library Smells Like Weed"
"Brain-Dead Teen, Only Capable Of Rolling Eyes And Texting, To Be Euthanized"
"Concentric Circles Emanating From Glowing Red Dot"
"Cop Explains How It Feels To Live Every Day In Fear Someone Might Record You Brutalizing A Civilian"
"Cucumber Is Everywhere, So Why Are People Still Fat?"
"Everyone At Office Planning Shooting Spree For Same Day"
"Ex-Pedophile Shares Tips On How To Make Your Kids Less Attractive"
"Hollow Point Bullets Recalled That Don't Explode In Targets"
"Hot Kids - Teachers, Ep. 2"
"How Do Archers Resist Firing Arrows At Everyone In The Spectator Gallery?"
"How To Play Golf Against The Man Whose Wife You're Banging On The Side"
"Is The Government Spying On Schizophrenics Enough?"
"Judge Rules White Girl Will Be Tried As Black Adult"
"Little Boy Heroically Shoots, Mutilates Burglar"
"Missing Teen's Friends Go On TV To Plead For Her Release, Gossip About Ugly Classmates"
"New Anti-Smoking Ads Warn Teens 'It's Gay To Smoke'"
"New Prius Helps Environment By Killing Its Owner"
"New Wearable Computer Also Sucks Your Dick"
"Overcome Stress By Visualizing It As A Greedy, Hook-Nosed Race Of Creatures"
"Patriotic Teen Fails Spanish"
"Police Say School Shooter Had History Of School Shootings"
"Political Talk Show Host Suddenly Very Interested In Manslaughter Law Loopholes"
"Pretend You Give A Shit About The Election"
"Scientists Successfully Teach Gorilla It Will Die Someday"
"Search Crews Continue To Look For Obviously Dead Hikers"
"Slow-Witted Conspiracy Theorist Convinced Government Behind NASA"
"Special Boy With Freakishly Large Brain Wins Spelling Bee"
"Supreme Court Revokes Annoying Man's Free Speech Rights (Season 1 Ep: 3 on IFC)"
"U.S. Government Stages Fake Coup To Wipe Out National Debt"
"World's Oldest Neurosurgeon Turns 100"