Comments by "Sexy Beast" (@sexybeast7728) on "Charisma on Command"
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I can give you example, yesterday i was on main square with 4 girls and 2 guys from my college class standing and waiting for tram and i started conversation asking every one of them which path they are heading.
All of them answered except for one girl that was like,
- "why would you ask, why would you care, it's none of your business, it's my private life..." (she was just teasing, but still), i responded to her:
- "why would i not ask?, i am just making a conversation going. everyone said where they are going, what's the big deal" - i got an agreement form the group and whole focus was on her.
She kept teasing for a little bit more than she stopped for the rest of the night. I also told her in joking way that i will never ask her that question ever again because he clearly is upset by it (and i mean it). She gave me smile.
That also gives me fundation for future jokes. Simple line like: "I would ask you where are you going now but i said i will never do that again so..". That line will make her giggle for a bit.
The point is, as long as you act confidently and assuming that you are acting the way people should act in that social situation, you have nothing to worry about.
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- - , i talk from an experience. I used to say that i "hate" small talks, but as it turns out, i just wasnt good at it, and i love them now. I am an introvert, btw. After a huge party, i need 3 days for myself, to be with my thoughts only, to energize, then i am good to go again (definition of an introvertism is not that you dont like socializing, but that you get tired by it, opposed to extroverts who get energized by it). I love every bit of socializing, but not too often.
You might not like small talks, but hate is too strong word. It's like saying: "I love swimming, but i hate getting wet." It makes no sense. You are lying. Small talk is just a medium to get to deeper conversation, a stage of interaction in which you build trust. You need it, i need it, everybody needs it, that's why it is there so let go off your ego and fucking get good at it. You dont hate small talks, you just hate engaging in an activity you suck at. Do something about that!
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