Comments by "Gareth Hart" (@tgheretford) on "Chris Williamson" channel.

  1.  @LightYagami_99  Madness isn't it? But there is a big push at the moment for "women's safety" whether through a terror review, new laws or forthcoming requirements under the Online Safety Act. To the point that dating apps are going to have to vet men and that people are going to have to be warned that unwanted attention and communication will be a crime - which also includes rejection. And that's before we get to men who can't find partners being profiled and punished.
    5
  2. We are in a moral panic and I worry that knee jerk reactions will lead to bad law, whether that is further censorship, profiling of certain groups (namely asocial, awkward and autistic single men as there is already lobbying to remove "low mate value" men from society) on the grounds of "safety" and new online safety laws.
    5
  3.  @brianmeen2158  Alex's own data - 20% of women would report a man who gave unwanted attention to her to an authority figure such as HR or the Police (if confident enough that something will be done). That isn't rare and men can't mind read.
    4
  4. The advice that is coming out to men in the mainstream media who are failing in the dating market is that their societal value is based on how women view them, how it is only men who need to improve and no matter how much hard work to succeed in life you do, you still need to "do better, bucko". Dating gurus are exploiting this to get unsuccessful in dating men to promise a quick fix and hope for money. When it inevitably fails, they are told they didn't put in enough effort and upsold more courses. An indefinite cycle. The thing is, life isn't fair. You can't lift to gain good genes. You can't work out to a six foot height. Some people are dealt a bad hand in life and have to make the best they got but you also have to be realistic and not delusional. In the same way that a forty year old can't expect to be a Premier League footballer or the fastest sprinter in the world. You can't expect everyone to be a CEO earning millions and we can't equalise everyone to the same standard.
    4
  5. It's complex. It's also the inability to afford housing, having to have two people in work to make ends meet, single women actively choosing not to have relationships and much more.
    3
  6. I've looked at single person data by sex in the UK and it turns out that single men outnumber single women until both hit their 70s, when life expectancy becomes a factor and the numbers swing in the other direction. Pretty sure the situation in America won't be radically different.
    3
  7. I think dating advice is based around two groups of people - the "promiscuous 10%"and the chronically single 10%, the latter leading the conversation. The "good" 80% of single people are very quickly into long-term relationships and don't recognise what is being said. And virtually all of them don't use online dating either (just nine percent of singles in the last year).
    3
  8.  @nocturnaljoe9543  Pew Research Centre data, so it will be the USA.
    3
  9. If "just lift bro" is so important and critical for both physical and mental health in the same manner as, say, employment, why does society not treat the former in the same way as the latter? If it would solve a whole wealth of issues and abolish the concept of psychologists needing to treat trauma overnight, why has society not implemented enforced fitness in the same way as enforced employment and enforced monogamy?
    3
  10. Most people meet partners via closed social groups. What if that man has no group to be a part of, which becomes predominant when they reach their thirties and beyond?
    3
  11. The advice to wait until your thirties to find someone and have children is bad advice for women and for men. Women have a biological clock, men have an experience clock.
    3
  12. Yes. But reality doesn't make profit. False hope does.
    3
  13. People tend to make the mistaken assumption that hypergamy means date up in terms of money. That isn't the case. Hypergamy has always been a thing before the invention of money. There are many factors that go into it. Nowadays everyone is aiming for the top or nothing. Until that changes, we're stuck in this loop.
    3
  14.  @okaySam  Vogels and McClain, Key findings about online dating in the U.S., Pew Research Centre, February 2. 2023. I believe the 9% figure was worked out from their data and possibly other data sets I don't have to hand but came out before Valentine's Day this year. ETA: One of the other data sets used was Singles in America, Match & Kinsley Institution, 2022.
    3
  15. "Life is cope" as a content creator on this site told me. And he is right. All those seething at what was said on this video, without disrespect, are coping.
    3
  16. We're starting to see women, particularly those who have a career and as childless women now outearn their male peers, rejecting the "beta bux" and replacing men with the state, family and other women for their financial and emotional needs.
    3
  17. Peterson can't make every man a winner. There will always be losers, that's always been the case in life. Life is not fair and you can be dealt a bad hand at birth. If the men currently lower in value improve, the men above them will also improve and to a greater extent, raising standards even more. Things that were exceptional eventually become the expectation. And the bar raises even higher for every man to meet.
    2
  18. The problem is, that doesn't sell self-help coaching programmes or therapy sessions where people will suddenly deny genetics and go full "blank slate" in the belief that everyone can be equally successful if they just work hard, go to the gym and touch grass.
    2
  19. Some of the comments on here want us all to aspire to be something that isn't possible for the vast majority of people. The models you see either take substances regularly or other unhealthy practices leading to body dysphoria, have their images doctored and filtered, are swamped with expensive make-up, have beauty regimes which are simply impossible to fit in, have expensive private surgery or are living on the bank of someone else where money is not a worry. This is not normal. This is not average. This is not aspirational to be average or the norm. Most people work in essential jobs which are long hours, do not have eighteen spare hours a day to work out at the gym and we can't all physically aspire to be what is deemed the peak. In the same way everyone can not be Usain Bolt. What about the men who are below six feet, how will a gym make them taller? Life is not ITV's Love Island or an Instagram feed.
    2
  20.  @gorguts-x9y  "Then date someone who's not into social media" Could be translated as "just unicorn bruh".
    2
  21. 100% of divorce is caused by marriage. That's a statistic you can take to the bank.
    2
  22. My observations are that women who want relationships are already in them while single women don't want them. I'd also argue that men struggle to get relationships because it is women, not men, who determine the conditions for mating, dating and relationships.
    2
  23. ​ @nidavelliir  Correct. Elon Musk didn't work his backside off in the womb before he was born, most CEO's did not stretch themselves on the rack at the gym to be over six foot and Usain Bolt did not train eighteen hours a day before birth either. With all due respect, anyone advocating for the "blank slate" and believe that hard work cancels genetics and that everyone can have equal outcomes if they just work hard is coping.
    2
  24. According to recent data, only a small percentage of men are on online dating. As are a smaller percentage of women.
    2
  25. And increasingly, by the whole of society through a custodial sentence, being put on a register and given a criminal record.
    2
  26.  @okaySam  The data I saw from the Pew Research data suggested 30% have used dating apps at any time, which would make the 9% for the last year of data collected as legitimate. The latest data from Michael Rosenfeld on how couples met (Stanford, 2021) suggests around 53% met online. But as I stated in my original post, meeting online is not the same as meeting via online dating. That's the mistake I originally made as well. As I stated in the OP, most people who meet online don't meet their partner via online dating.
    2
  27. Women want to be approached by attractive, high-status men and will make that clear to said men. It's the large percentile of men who are average or below whom women do not want approaching them. It's why you are starting to see the emergence of new women's safety laws which will deal with rejection, "creeps" and unwanted communication/attention.
    2
  28. The mainstream media's suggestion for the dating and mating crisis is that it is exclusively men's fault. Yet the expectations placed upon men when they are told to "do better, bucko" is rising so high that increasing numbers of men can simply not meet those expectations. We're setting them all up to fail which ultimately makes them unattractive which sets them up to fail and the cycle continues. I am noticing that there are increasing numbers of women exiting the dating market and having their own child alone (with a greater income and Government help than their male peers), a pet or a same-sex relationship. We know men have also exited the dating market because the game is rigged against them but I posit that women find it much easier to exit the market than men and are doing so in greater numbers. And its probably down to biological reality in terms of reproductive cost. If a large number of men exit society, the remaining men will take up the slack alongside immigration and automation. If a large number of women did the same thing, your society will collapse in a generation.
    2
  29.  @midatlantic09  I'm looking at Office of National Statistics data in the UK. It is clear that young and childless women are outearning men.
    2
  30. The assumption that 30 chances means that 1/10 men will practically succeed with 10/10 women is not correlating with the real life experiences of 1/10 men. Or any men under 5/10 I would fathom. I suspect men low on the attractiveness scale are not swiping right thirty times and succeeding in attaining a long term relationship with the hottest woman on Tinder. The data I have seen suggests they'll be doing exceptionally well to go on one date with any woman after 3,000 swipes! We are being asked to reject the evidence of our eyes and ears.
    2
  31. They've been on a mass deletion trend lately. I get shadowbanned, replies hidden and comments deleted regularly despite being civil and polite. I called it out this afternoon on another video by editing the comment and all of a sudden, people started seeing it, left likes and commented.
    1
  32.  @throwacnt7603  Search YouTube for PsycHacks - Women Are Making Society Polygamous.
    1
  33.  @RunninQHsRock  I think all of my posts are getting shadowbanned now because I am suddenly getting zero to little engagement for comments on any channel, including channels unrelated to such topics such as computing and media.
    1
  34. The modern day Copernican heliocentrism. Where society deems such a suggestion taboo, stigmatised and heresy. But it's true.
    1
  35.  @HiNickCares  Correct. Designed to get the public to agree to new online safety and anti-misogyny laws that the UK Government (and beyond) had planned to introduce all along that takes freedom away and gives the state power under the guise of "safety".
    1
  36.  @mickvonbornemann3824  The Public Order Act, harassment and stalking laws, the Online Safety Act and soon the Protection From Sex-based Harassment Bill and the Worker Protection Bill. And you don't have to do it more than once to break the law. Why do you think police officers have been stationed in nightclubs in the UK? It isn't for a drink and a dance. It's because women have told them they don't want to be hit on or chatted up at all. Once is one too many.
    1
  37.  @scottbarnett3566  But on the flip side, it saves money for social healthcare systems.
    1
  38. There are increasing numbers of men now who believe they have nothing to lose as they priced out of housing, employment and family. This is not good for society and civilisation.
    1
  39. At this point, it's like getting people off alcohol and go clean and sober. It's the other socially acceptable vice.
    1
  40. Highly upvoted comments: "dating is so hard, men are struggling and women are telling men not to approach". Commentators on videos: "just shoot your shot bruh, it's easy and you're guaranteed success - no consequences". The high status latter need to listen to the wisdom of the demos.
    1
  41. We have a Children's Commissioner who believes parents and adults should lead by example - ie. ban the use of mobile phones by themselves and not use social media.
    1
  42.  @jayc342009  Not all men are equal. Would those 70% of women change their mind if that man was unattractive?
    1
  43. It's actually changed in the last few years. Women do want to "play the field" as you put it but no longer want to get married or want relationships (with anyone except the top tier men) through the rest of their lives. The question for society becomes what do we do with all the leftover men? That question wasn't really answered in this video.
    1
  44. And the thing is, genetic winners benefit from the halo effect which informs their social interactions.
    1
  45. There will be a push to ban AI generated adult entertainment and bots/dolls. It is the anti-dating/relationship behaviour they enable and the men they help that people have an objection to. We value heterosexual men based on their ability and status to be pre-selected and attractive to a woman. The same reason why we are seeing a push to try and get adult entertainment banned (with age restriction as plan B in the bank) in the Online Safety Bill while politicians and activists still have a chance before it becomes law. And why they also want to shut down avenues for men to learn how to attract women online (though I have my criticisms of the dating coaches online today).
    1
  46. This is the mindset behind the "blank slate" where genetics are considered a myth, no-one inherits wealth from their parents and that everyone can achieve equal outcomes if everyone works hard equally.
    1
  47.  @midatlantic09  Women are outearning men when young and childless. That reverses when they leave the workforce to have a child.
    1