Comments by "exnihilo415" (@exnihilo415) on "Asian Boss" channel.

  1.  @abelincoln7346  My wife is a Thai trans woman. What do you think I don’t understand? Identity politics is literally everywhere in Thailand. PTP, Phak Kao Klai, Royalists, rural vs urban, Buddhists vs Muslim south, hi-so vs lo-so. Identity politics are a facet of every culture and country.
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  2. Watching porn and having a partner are not mutually exclusive. Some couples even watch porn together. It is 2020.
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  3. Keep in mind they’re using the English word here at all, just for your benefit. Many subtleties are lost in translation. Thai people have their own words in Thai to describe And identity trans folks. There is a cultural history of trans people in Thailand (and all over South Asia really) for hundreds and hundreds of years and the evolution of LGBT rights and culture is not on the same evolutionary path as the western model. My wife is a Thai trans women. She doesn’t think of herself as a ladyboy. Her command of English is also quite above average for a Thai person so she understands the western subtext now in ways other Thai people do not. There are also problematic words in here used in Thai, as you can find discussed deep in the comments below. It is not helped that Thai trans women cannot change their legal gender in Thailand no matter what they do and that does take a toll On the agency you have over over your own gender identity when your own identity card betrays you. If you have any questions just ask, this is a topic I know quite a bit about as you can imagine.
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  4. Ok. At the same time the word has come to mean different things in the west vs Thailand. Thats the case for hundreds and hundreds of borrowed words from English with different meanings and subtext in both places. It’s also complicated because Trans people can’t change their legal gender nor can they legally marry their opposite gender spouses. My wife is a Thai trans woman. If you have any questions about LGBT Thailand, just ask. Cheers.
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  5. Oh, please. The cultural history of trans people in Asia goes back thousands of years.
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  6. More urban folklore than anything. There a handful of examples of all sorts of terrible things, doesn't mean it was at all typical. No doubt a handful of parents sold their cis daughters off into sex slavery also. Not typical either.
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  7. You keep trying to draw a social distinction between trans women and cis women that I will never recognize. It does not matter if one woman is stronger than another because they are both women to me. Any argument you could use for trans women imperiling the safety of cis women I could also apply to cis women with a criminal record. Statistically people with a criminal record are more likely to commit more crime than people without a criminal record. Yet no one is suggesting that we should bar cis female criminals from women’s restrooms, or because they are criminals send them in with the men whom can better defend themselves against crime. That is because we recognize the inherent femininity of cis female criminals. I recognize the inherit femininity of trans women. You do not. That’s why this entire back and forth is pointless. We are on opposing sides of this argument. There is zero chance of you convincing me of anything and zero chance of me convincing you of anything. What point is there in continuing?
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  8. Discomfort around trans women, in the restroom or otherwise, is transphobia. I will never see it as anything else. Just you would see banning Caucasian women from women’s restrooms because they’re stronger women on average than Asian women or banning another ethnicity’s women from women’s restrooms because they statistically more likely to commit more crime is racism, I see banning trans women from women’s restrooms as transphobia. Again, nothing you say can convince me otherwise. Yet we continue in sheer pointlessness wasting each other’s time.
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  9. What’s the point of posting the same line of argumentation with two different accounts minutes apart? First, no one will ever read this far down this thread. Second, it’s completely apparent to anyone that it’s you.
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  10. @x x I'm insensitive about this. You're correct. You're welcome to not like my approach. That's not going to change the way I do things. We each decide how we want to conduct ourselves.
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  11. That’s a really great story. Thanks for sharing.
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  12. Gay people are gay. They’re not going to suddenly find women attractive because of this hocus pocus. Ex gay ministries fail spectacularly. Look into the history of them.
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  13.  @_alessandra__  Thanks. I've had many decades to think bout this. I've had the fortune to visit a number of different countries. I'm also old, so I remember how things were and what changed hearts and minds of the general population in various places and what didn't. I'm bisexual. My wife is a Thai trans woman. I've had long term relationships with cis women, gay men and trans women so I can see this from many sides. I also viscerally understand homophobia and transphobia and times were much worse in those early days. As it is the case that in many places you actually have to make sacrifices (sometimes big, sometimes small) to lead an open LGBT life, it's a lot easier to adopt a "My LGBT life is none of your business" attitude because it leads to less cognitive dissonance because underneath it all most everyone realizes that the more LGBT people that are out and visible is a collective good for the LGBT community. Familiarity begets comfort begets understanding and support from allies that help laws get passed that help the LGBT community and reduces social discrimination and hostility.
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  14.  @andynonymous6769  No disagreement here. That’s what I’ve been saying throughout the thread. I don’t know about everyone under 25 being bisexual, though. I live in one of the most progressive places in the world and actual practiced bisexuality just isn’t that common, millennials and zoomers included.
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  15.  @siunaldosuwiiiiii  I'm always happy to displease homophobes.
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  16. You don’t think laws can change mindsets and actions? Pretty sure this janitor wouldn’t have forced this trans girl down to the security office if she knew the SOGIE law had passed and knew what would happen to her if she did that.
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  17. Thailand (and many other countries in the area) has had trans women / 3rd gender people for hundreds of years, going back to the Kama Sutra. It’s neither new nor unusual from a historical perspective. Western Europe and it’s colonial expansion were particularly condemning of LGBT people and you’ll find the laws against sodomy where enacted during this time for the first time in many countries. As countries tried to modernize in the face of aggressive colonial expansion local LGBT people were often thrown under the bus. Thailand is unique in SE Asia in that it wasn’t never taken over by a hostile foreign power so some of these traditions are better preserved. Buddhism is also vastly better than abrahamic religions at personal autonomy. From my point of view the question is not “Why are there so many trans women in Thailand” but rather why do other countries repress their trans women so much that they hide and are driven to suicide? My wife is a Thai trans woman. We live in the US now. What questions do you have?
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  18.  @Opal5674  Spent much time in Thailand, have you? My wife is a Thai trans woman so this is a topic I know quite well. She didn’t suffer any sexual abuse nor did any of her Thai trans friends. There really aren’t really that many trans people per capita in Thailand. A percent or so per capita. Seems like more because you see a lot doing sex work in tourist areas but in the countryside it’s far less common. Best estimates for California is 0.6% (Williams institute study) and growing as social hostility and discrimination is becoming less severe by the year. If you want to call people exercising their freedom to dress and love life as they want as a “contagion” that’s on you. I just call it personal freedom.
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  19.  @Opal5674  There are way more Thai trans women than sex trafficked children in Thailand. How much time have you spent in Thailand talking to Thai trans women?
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  20.  @brucehwang9789  Rest assured, I'm very aware of the differences between the LGBT west and L:GBT Thailand up to and including the unfortunate lack of most LGBT law in Thailand that leaves many Thai LGBT people twisting in the wind. That said, as you know, Thailand's democracy is in a pretty deplorable state and getting anything constructive done is quite a logistical challenge. That said, there is hope on the horizon for marriage equality first and then transgender gender change later as is the case in Taiwan, Hong Kong, Korea and Japan.
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  21. Ladyboy is just an easy word for Thai people as basic English speakers to remember and pronounce. Only the person in question can tell you about the gender they identity as. My wife is a Thai trans woman. If you have any questions, just ask.
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  22. ​ @eksdee3709  Why do heterosexual people get to be open about their spouses and families and LGBT people get to hide in the closet twisting in the wind without full legal equality? This is just a defense of the status quo where LGBT people suffer and to defend it is to be complicit in that suffering. In every country, dozens now, there have been fears that too much too soon would lead to a backlash that would slow down equality. It has been proven wrong every time in completely unique cultural circumstances from South Africa, to Uruguay to Spain to Iceland to Canada. Honestly, go look. It is the case. The public needs to understand that LGBT people exist, are being marginalized and that this is a real human rights problem that needs addressing to do right by it's own citizens. If that's uncomfortable for some, great. More will rise to offer support. There is nothing uniquely western about successful political action. You also do not speak for all of Asia. Thai ladyboys are as Asian as they come and they've been living openly for hundreds and hundreds of years before Columbus landed in the Bahamas.
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  23. Trans women are women to me and I don’t care what you have to say about that tbh. I call people what they want to be called. It’s the only decent thing to do. I have no way of ascertaining any biological facts anyway nor is it any of my business.
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  24. Myself and millions of others see trans women as women. Nothing you say will change that.
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  25. Ladyboy does not mean that. Plenty self identifying ladyboys have had GRS and plenty have not. Transsexual isn’t really used as a useful term anymore. It’s all under a broad umbrella of transgender. My wife is a Thai trans woman. If you have any questions, just ask.
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  26. Ladyboys love ladybugs too. 🐞
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  27. As if the word ladyboy wasn’t a western word. Thai trans women have their own Thai words to refer to themselves.
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  28. Thank you for your support.
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  29. They would say the same about your transphobia.
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  30. Did you ask those children if they were happy drressed / presenting that way?. That’s the key question. Many trans children should be so lucky to have such accepting parents.
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  31. You’re that afraid of seeing a trans person? You may never want to leave your house. There are trans people in every country in the world, after all.
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  32. Most Thai trans women are actually not sex workers. You can see them working retail and salon jobs all over untouristed Thailand.
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  33.  @cloudyheart5148  Can't stop. Won't stop. My wife is a trans woman and she's legally female. No one knows what it's really like to be another person, male or female. Plenty of women (cis and trans alike) can't have their own children. Doesn't make them any less of a woman. Gender is in the mind, not the body. Feel free to disagree. I'm going to be here supporting trans women (and trans men) in their gender identity. Feel free to promote whatever exclusionary practices you like.
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  34. That is a big difference. That isn’t true in many other countries among middle aged people.
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  35.  @Pedro-pl6to  I’m Not interested in supernatural mumbo jumbo. Thai people are 90%+ Buddhist and have no use for Jesus either. Better luck elsewhere buddy.
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  36.  @kinndah2519  She’s a woman to me. Gender isn’t the same thing as biology. It’s a cultural role and an identity.
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  37. There never is the same MTF to FTM ratio anywhere.
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  38. Ladyboy in Thailand is just an English word used largely for the convenience of English speakers. Thai folks have their own words in Thai with their own subtext.
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  39. My wife is legally female and the county clerk said, “I now pronounce you husband and wife”. Love is love. Disapprove all you like, I’ll just love my wife more the more adversity I face. It’s like a daily reminder to appreciate what you have. Thanks!
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  40. Very sad. Here’s to hoping conditions for LGBT people improve in Malaysia.
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  41. That’s what all the homophobes and transphobes say.
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  42. That’s what all the homophobes and transphobes say.
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  43.  @ichsanabdilah4724  I am absolutely certain that there is nothing wrong with being bisexual. It is as normal and right as being left handed. Your “my friend” gaslighting homophobia is as sad as it is passive aggressive. Your naïveté about sexual orientation is an embarrassment in 2021. LGBT people deserve nothing less than full equality under the law for their relationships, anything less is 2nd class citizenship.
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  44. Have you spent much time in Thailand talking to Thai ladyboys?
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  45.  @janemadrid2845  Do you know trans people personally in the US?
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  46. There isn’t all that many in Thailand. 1% of the population or so. There are trans women in every country. Thailand is very tolerant and has been for quite some time. Lots of countries have a lot of hostility and discrimination against trans people so a lot fewer actually transition which is changing now that trans people are being more accepted. Know hope!
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  47.  @torogenghis1609  No cis women over 55 are getting pregnant either. They’re still women. Fertility isn’t femininity.
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  48. ​ @gaafailok3719  Transgender demographics are quite difficult to ascertain but one can get in the ballpark. Lets look at rates of prevalence. In the US the Williams Institute, estimated with the best available data that 0.58% of U.S. adults identify as transgender. That's about 3 in 500 people, or about 1.4 million for the US as a whole. Are the rates higher in Thailand. Absolutely. But how much higher? For that one needs to actually go to Thailand in various places and do observations for a sustained length of time keeping in mind that some trans women are completely unclockable, but only about 10% would really fall into this category to someone with a trained eye. Having done that I'm going to put the metrics at about 3 per 100 people or 3%. It's less in the country side there are fewer and in Bangkok there are more. There are number of factors that make it seem like there are more trans women than they are. 1. Publicity. Thailand is famous for this so everyone is looking for this. There are a number of ladyboy cabaret shows which are well publicized and marketed to tourists. 2. In the tourist areas there are a number of red-light districts with many trans women in them that tourists are going to see by visiting. Soi Cowboy, Nana Plaza, Patpong, Soi 6 / Walking Street Pattaya. In other, less tourist-ed parts of the country there really are a lot less. There is a cultural tradition of 3rd gendered people in many countries in the world that western europe / US doesn't have. Muxes in Mexico. Waria in Indonesia. Hijra in India. Two-spirit people in Native Americans, and yes Kathoey in Thailand. They have all been part of the cultural landscape for hundred and hundreds of years without a strong social prohibition. This is very much not the case in the west. Discrimination against trans people has only in the last 20 years lessened. It wasn't until the mid 1970s that many US cities (Chiciago, Houston, Denver, etc) made cross dressing not against the law. Trans people still face a great deal of discrimination but it's clear that in the last 20 years that the number of new patients at gender clinics in the US and the UK has gone up by a tremendous year over year increase every year. For many people in the west the risk of living publicly as trans wasn't worth the cost but that equation is now changing and more and more people are transitioning. In San Francisco, I run into almost as many trans women as I do in Bangkok. It's also much easier to access transgender health care in Thailand and the costs are fairly low. There is very little gatekeeping involved unlike the west. These are the factors. If you have any followup questions, just ask. This is a topic that I know quite a bit about.
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  49. You are aware that Thailand is 90%+ Buddhist, right? This Transphobic God of yours isn’t very applicable to the vast majority of Thai people.
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  50. Sadly, all those haters will never understand genetics or endocrinology at this level.
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