Comments by "Jack B" (@WindFireAllThatKindOfThing) on "Late Night with Seth Meyers" channel.

  1. But with Manchin & Sinema there, even with Vice President voting for dems and Warnock clinching Georgia, it's more like 50-51 in Republicans favor.
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  2. He really loses the accent when he's sober, amirite?
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  3. The jackal in me wants to tell Seth that aged paper discoloration is called "foxing" But I won't. I'm not that passive aggressive.
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  4. That we ever lived in a world where Donald Trump was made into a celebrity since the 80's demonstrates that we've been in the Idiocracy for a long, looooong time.
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  5. I mean, technically we should be calling our cars "gas wagons" and bathrooms the "mostly used to poop room", but sometimes you gotta go with the better branding rather than the more ascetic descriptor
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  6. "You're farm people" You’ve got to remember that these are just simple farmers. These are people of the land. The common clay of the new West. You know… morons. - Jim
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  7. Dear Brits: Why call it a flat when they're usually in a building stacked on top of each other? Seems like a Stack to me.
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  8. I'm almost impressed by Trump's ability to not break rhythm while crapping himself on stage
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  9. Jesus Murphy, no... Edit: In fact, stop saying that. End this meme right now before he gets wind of it and Twittershits it out in the next 10 minutes
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  10. He's a master jabaiter, and the entire jackal nation can't resist. It's in our constitutional bylaws.
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  11.  @goldwincs  Well, look on the bright side: People are going to see a living example of the difference between a memelord and someone who is legit funny
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  12. Even Cobra Commander is trying to distance himself by saying he's become a "Libertarian" now. Which is like saying "BASE!" when you've been cornered playing tag.
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  13. "Woke mob cancels neckwear" My Evil Liberal Agenda sympathy just went up another notch.
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  14. Winkler not only regifted a hat he didnt want, he got Tapper to legit thank him for it Bloody mastermind
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  15. Thankfully, that silly southern twang in their accent serves as a helpful warning sign that what you're about to hear is nothing more than the neighing and braying of barnyard animals It really does prove one is as dumb and salty as the stereotypes suggest.
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  16.  @thisisutubnottwitterwhyhandles  Filibustering a full senate vote for SCOTUS nominations is no longer allowed. That's a rule Republicans made so they could ram THEIR 3 justices through.
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  17.  @grakkerful  They got their benefits packages and sleezed off into the sunset. Especially after Ryan led the charge on multiple spending bills that run up deficits while going Blah Blah Blah about fiscal conservatism regarding anything that actually helped veterans and working people, and practicing none of it when it came to spending contracts and sweetheart business tax bennies.
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  18. I also recommend Sausage Party and The Onion Movie for children. Highly educational, rich in fiber and protien.
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  19. New Biden Administration Strat should be: Crush your enemies, see them driven before you, and hear the lamentation of their lobbyists
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  20. And that, ladies and gentlemen, is what 3 WIS and 3 INT, and 18 CON looks like Because if you're gonna be dumb, then you better be tough
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  21. When the Idiocracy met Orwell's Oceania.
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  22. It's like when you see some of the Daily Show crew get together, past and present. Just pure joy.
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  23. A Potato would feel bad losing to Walker. At least the potato has some nutritional value.
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  24. Rake Gate has been SOOOO memeworthy today
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  25. "I'm Cobra Commander™, and I approved this message"
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  26.  @vadimastprojects8770  As a post-doc grad of Agitator University, can confirm: I was there
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  27. Sadly, Meatloaf would have been there either way
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  28. He's on the Dick Cheney health plan. He just eats orphans and gets free heart transplants with his Heart of the Month Club membership
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  29. She fought in the battle of Bowling Green with Seth Rich
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  30. Blood and circuses for the Pro Wrestling crowd from a guy who promised to throw the Brown and Gay into the Arena. They ain't worried about bread...take one look at them and you can see not one of them has ever missed a meal.
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  31.  @DPowered2  And he offered to be a narc for Nixon.
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  32. He tried to infiltrate the DNC without DAAAAA HAIRS
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  33. We all know Bernie would look more like Yoda. Hell, he already DOES look like Yoda.
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  34. I have higher standards for mobsters. At least they're experienced law professionals. At breaking it, sure, but it's not amateur hour all day long.
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  35. The only thing he has in common with the Constitution are the letters C, U, N, and T
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  36. Joy is the kind of guest who is in the green room having alot of those wine popsicles.
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  37. @MomoTheBellyDancer Yep. It's been a courtesy for Congress to have the Justice Dept. handle (and jail) those who commit contempt of congress, but the Sergeants at Arms are not obligated to go through them. They and their subordinates are fully badged law enforcement officers in their own right that work with the Capitol Police Chief, and do not answer to the Attorney General. It's been all courtesy and team work between them up to this point. Since there is no (useable) capitol jail, and they can't trust the DOJ when the AG is in on the caper, anyone they do put in cuffs will likely have to be held in a DC precinct jail until they are tried by the House. The lore & story of the Capitol Building "jail" is too convoluted to cover here.
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  38. lol @ the rubes who thought this segment was about making actually funny plays on words, not groan puns meant to make Seth look awkward, which is funnier "Scotty, you just don't get it, do you?"
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  39. My god. I think you got to the bottom of the mystery. Putin own the controlling stake in Orville Reddenbocker & Pop Secret! It's all so clear now....
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  40. The Alpha Jackal will always be Leave 'Em Alone guy
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  41. Barry Goldwater would be a radical liberal to today's Conservatives And he was jewish, so that's an automatic showstopper with the Tiki Torch demographic They're actually getting more Confederate every year.
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  42. Bigots throwing money at you to channel their bigotry for them, and a Party made to weaponize exactly that kind of behavior It's a growth industry. Limbaugh, Hannity, Stone, Jones, O'Reilly, the list goes on and keeps growing. We just call them Republicans, even when they lie and say they're "Libertarian"
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  43. "This Presidency is so half-baked and toxic it literally skipped past food poisoning and went straight to Cancer. Honestly, who thinks Tea Pot Dome involved doilies and a cozy? You gave up a King for this? God save the Queen. Old tart that she is, still better than this."
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  44.  @mws8389  <--- that whole Nuke-A-Hurricane-With-A-Straight-Face plan was the Gold Medal winner right there
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  45. Next thing you know, some draft dodging All-American 'Hero' actor will try to be the next John Wayne (who never served) and have his fans and allies in government assault and imprison American citizens he doesn't like...the kind of person might even try to become presid....oh wait.
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  46. Red meat is PART of your health. But only about 3 oz a day. We did evolve on it, for hundreds of thousands of years so let's not muddy the waters with misinformation. Veganism causes malnutrition medical effects in the long term that Vegetarian or Pescatarian diets do not. That still doesn't change the fact that Republicans have jacked up the Bullshit Meter to 11 by trying to appeal to the Anti Vegans.
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  47. Because it happens online, its technically an e-Jackalation.
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  48. When he said he was 'touched' by Republicans who told him not to let 'these people' see him, he should have realized they were telling him 'We have a mob, and I've sent them after you. Run, hide, resign, whatever. But don't let my people see you.'
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  49. He's just lucky we live in the era of widescreen TV's. If you watch him in 4:3, you'd be forgiven for thinking the image was from a funhouse mirror
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  50. Ft Polk. Heard it around Alexandria all the time. Thought people were putting me on. The worst part of getting new orders is when the accents start to rub off on you and your fellow meatballs after just a few months on post.
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