Comments by "Kasumi Rina" (@KasumiRINA) on "The Onion" channel.

  1. You literally could in Ukraine, he ran for Odesa municipal council and got a seat... Chewbacca and Vader lost the mayoral elections though. (None of that is a joke, look it up).
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  2. Oof shots fired!
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  3. That whole situation is so hilarious for us in East Europe: Americans are fighting for using their COLONIZER'S LANGUAGE and it alone. While we are fighting to reduce our colonizers language to zero. Still doesn't beat the fact that Yanks love Imperial system of measurements despite literally being a product of fighting against said British empire)))
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  4. Was this written before or after the alt right protest against a Wolfenstein game being a "left wing power fantasy" about actually defeating Hitler in World War 2.
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  5. Hello. I am Ukrainian. Boo!
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  6.  @grimmseti  Literally no. Every vote countries in non-communist countries but I guess not in USA where politburo decides over will of the people.
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  7. It's easy with Batman and Terminator, as in, both franchises only made two movies by one director each AND NO MOVIES WERE EVER DONE SINCE DON'T EVEN TRY MENTIONING OTHERWISE!!1!!!!!!! Seriously, not the bat-nipples or the Christian Bale after gokkun party voice. No, that was just a bad dream with poor CG Arnold...
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  8. I always found it funny how Americans insist on ENGLISH language. Like guise, let me tell you what country it comes from...
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  9. And all phones inside the store will automatically start filming them. 911 calls will be redirected to fire department instead of police.
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  10. The irony is that Jesus was sentenced to death by Pilates then finished off being stabbed by a Roman soldier, i.e. one of very few white Europeans in ancient Israel.
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  11. This time, by pure accident, popular vote managed to coincide with the billionare politburo, or as you call it, electoral college. We had that system in USSR, it's a communist thing. We dropped it now and have democracy. Can't explain to Americans what it is, really... but see, in Europe, people actually decide who's the president – not that it matters are 73% of idiots here elected a clown who still is our president. Fuck.
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  12. Onion is mistaken. It's been long known the current minority that's responsible for everything that's wrong is ~~THEM~~
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  13. People outside of USA knew about the slavery and segregation there, but were mostly completely unaware of systematic racism that exists now in criminal system before this year, yeah.
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  14. I am not a graphic designer but I will take your words in support as an IBTC member.
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  15. This is from years ago when everyone used mobile data, duh.
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  16. Relevant to J.D. Vance
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  17. ​ @Z_MIB  that was the joke.
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  18. No, I am the law!
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  19. As a Ukrainian girl who wouldn't even cross Mexico-US border (Alberta is more our thing), I highly warn against deploying Ben Shapiro at the border: hydration is a serious issue and you don't want a lot of dried-up female mummies dying at the border from denyhdration from this overgrown chipmunk's complete and utter inability to make a woman wet.
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  20.  @pindol69  there's a huge risk of government declaring people they don't like "unfit for voting", so yeah, it probably will only do harm.
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  21. Best part is that I don't have to remember new American politicians because literally everyone they mentioned when this video was made and I was a kid is still in power! USA isn't so much different from USSR, the congress looks like Soviet Politburo at this point, at least the Joe Brezhnev had the self-awareness to retire... not Trumpov tho.
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  22. Listen, people are willing to do a lot of things to get rich: work hard, steal harder, even murder!.. but one thing I draw the line is, and I think everyone agrees, is golfing... I wouldn't be caught with a golf club even dead!!! It's so uncool and lame it made Samuel L. Jackson look like... a politician. So if being rich requires you to dress like a moron and drive those tiny carts invasion army uses in the East, get outta here!
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  23. There was a Soviet satirical movie where every employee walks down the company stairs saying "but I'm just one man what could I have done?", aloud. And they keep coming. I don't remember the context but the scene was very surreal.
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  24.  @Sam-lr9oi  Federalism sounds like a disease. I can't imagine if Odesa had separate laws from Dnipro or Kyiv. It would have been madness!
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  25. When you wrote that everyone was saying "crypto", "neuro" and "coin", now the buzzwords are "AGI", "LLM" and "ML", acronyms are the totally awesome rad swag for the fellow zoomers!
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  26. oh another Easter egg!
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  27. He's Greek tho
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  28.  @whentheyD  it's strange how US system works, it's so convoluted and this "states rights" nonsense I can't imagine every oblast' having their own laws, this is why in Europe we have elections last ONE DAY and that's it. You AUTOMATICALLY get registered, show your ID you AUTOMATICALLY got when you're about 16, go to the booth, vote, and go home. I voted thrice against Zelenskyy in 2019 and there were no lines or issues or long delays on everything, next morning came the facepalms and two years of him trying to make peace with enemy that we tried to tell him won't work.
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  29. I learned nouns from picture books as a kid then first grade grammar. Polished it with song lyrics and videogames... Then I watched Kubrick films without subs. Was pain.
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  30. Actually making pizza from scratch looks very similar down to a pre-made sauce, a dozen bowls for ingredients (chopped olives, cheese, tomatoes, pepperoni or other topping), a few baking sheets (because I am NOT doing that much work for ONE pizza) and everything covered with flour and grated cheese pieces.
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  31. Apparently they're the ones voting now.
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  32. This is a really good representation of intelligence level of someone who "isn't into politics".
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  33. The best part he doesn't even make a pause after she finishes the question lmao xD legit crying! :DDDDDDDDDDD
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  34. THey BAAAAAAAAAACK!!!!1!!1
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  35. Yes we have a saying, "if you're not interested in politics, politics is still interested in you". EVERY russian asked always says they're "not into politics". That's how you get putin.
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  36. This aged horribly, the current Kennedy candidate has brain worms!
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  37. Not on black ones in USA.
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  38. ​ @josephsolis6109  you know it's satire on 1960s America, right? It was a thing in the past. Some humans weren't allowed into sections of the bus reserved for "master race".
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  39. Umm... I AM FROM THE FUTURE. Guys vote blue this time.
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  40. Boi I think they had story that Bezos would block WaPo from publishing endorsement leaked to them so quickly used this.
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  41. With Mugabe dying, US has to be the only country keeping the Communist Party of Soviet Union tradition of keeping same people in power for 90+ years! Last bastion of true geriatric communism, the US of A and it's Politburo of 300 year old turtles like McConnel and I-switch-platforms-every-other-year Graham.
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  42. Funny tho is he the guy who marched with BLM and was one of like three republicans who didn't suggest giving more blowjobs to putin? So dude is switching views more often than a man named Lindsey.
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  43. Sane people absolutely DO say voting blue is the only thing that can save the country, you literally have comment below saying it's gonna be the last election if trump wins, and numerous YouTubers said it's the most important one in our lifetime, and they're right, though what also matters is what happens after - next attempt at coup would be better prepared. So to actually make sure this isn't the last election USA sees, Kamala Harris needs to: 1: Win by more than 4 million votes, as in the rigged American system, democrats have a handicap and need to win by literally 8 million votes or more for some reason. 2: Actually prevent a rebellion by already prepared militants who are saying the election is stolen even before the votes were cast. Kremlin-backed Putschists. 3: Survive the gallows they would bring a few months in, as in, not physically get hanged, as this is GOP's official policy for previous vice presidents. No pressure!
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  44.  @griffinrupe  true. Everyone should have a right to vote. In Ukraine convicts vote too, because we are a real democracy and not this electoral college politburo bullshite.
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  45. This is unironically a perfect illustration why media needs to be financed well, so it doesn't depend on ad revenue.
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  46. Yeah no multiple personalities just pseudo hallucinations, mostly audio.
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  47. You can have a good dark joke setup by describing discrimination left-handed people historically faced and trying the other person to guess what category of people you mean. They never do, thinking it's LGBT or Jews or whatever, and when revealed everyone feels STUPID because it's the dumbest reason to hate on someone.
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  48. ​ @honestaspie6405  they're hiding the fact that aliens built the Bass Shop Pro pyramid! Wake up sheeple.
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  49. It's good measles can go away in under 2 hours.
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  50. Performative stuff instead of real action was always a problem and not unique to America. Here's a Soviet joke: -Comrade Lenin, the Shkworks are starving! -What is this word? -Its our newspeak term for teachers, from "school workers". -My, my, what an ugly word to use for such a noble profession! Stop this immediately. -My apologies, comrade Lenin. The sh-teachers are starving. -Now this is much better! That's the punchline. Hypocritically applauding nurses instead of actually following pandemic rules, or attacking Spanish people for their language instead of paying reparations for slavery are the highest points of American hypocrisy.
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